|Reviews for anchorless in the broken world|
| memingers chapter 1 . 8/13/2013
Wow. This is beautiful. I love me some Endverse, and I think you nailed Castiel's characterization. Same with Dean, the poor baby. ;_; It was very poetic without being a freeverse, which I liked, and the title was cool. I also really loved how it felt like a snippet of life - it didn't really end conclusively and it was nice and short.
I don't really have much criticism, to be honest. I do wish I didn't have to squint so hard to see the Destiel - I don't think it was really a DeanCas fic even though it said so in the summary. Thanks for this! I really enjoyed it.
| eSJa chapter 1 . 8/1/2013
Cass, this is so heart-wrenching I can't even begin to count all the feels.
Castiel is a hard character to get a grip on simply because he's a freakin angel and who knows what goes through their heads. However he can be very human at times you captured it well.
I didn't remember much of the episode until I started reading but once I did it all came back. The Dean you show is exactly the Dean he would be in this situation, dark, uncaring and only alive because he hasn't done it himself yet.
The de-angeled Castiel is one of my favorites, you can feel how much pain he is in and even though he states it at the end it comes through right away how he feels. This drabble is a perfect example of show instead of tell.
There is a darkness that creeps into you as you read and I don't know if it's because I know the universe this is set in but I feel it's more than that. By the end of the second paragraph you're just as empty and fearful as Castiel and you want to stop reading but you can't because it's too compelling.
I really enjoyed the little detail of Dean tossing a beer to the man he kills. It's perfectly Dean, a distraction that seems totally normal, because in the past it would have been a silent "thanks" but now even that is just one more trick to get the kill.
Even if you don't know the fandom everything you need to know, to feel is right here and that makes it not just a great SPN fic but a great stand alone fic.
Great job Cass!
| Hurlstien chapter 1 . 7/6/2013
[always fighting to survive in a world that was already dead.] I enjoyed the contrast here, and already it gives me a good idea as to the kind of life they're living.
[He watches Dean as he tosses a beer to a man who has been with their group almost since the beginning, watches as Dean tells him "good job" and then blows his brains out.] I like the casual way you've described the death here, and the contrast is strange - though this may just be fandom blindness - he tosses the guy a beer, suggesting friendly relations, and this guy has been with them for a year, which makes it confusing when Dean suddenly kills him, for no reason, it seems. Though, having said that, this is something that simply draws me into the story more; I want to know why he did this, who the guy is, who Dean and Castiel are.
Ah, now it makes more sense; I just looked up [Croat] to find out it's some sort of zombie-like virus and that people with it are shot on site. Oh, and now I've found out the guy wasn't a Croat, and that he actually just screwed up a lot. The fact that his friend, Castiel, could tell he was lying simply by his posture was good, shows the closeness between them.
[Dean catches his eye and gives him a dark look, daring him to judge him for his little impromptu execution.] The silent conflict between the two suggests the closeness we can already tell is there and also the difference in opinion, while the [daring him to judge him] bit made me think Dean has the dominant role in their relationship, and it is added to with this next bit: [There's nothing left of Dean in those eyes, nothing left of the man who had sacrificed his soul, once, in exchange for Sam's life] he sounds like he used to be a really good guy, and, like most things in life, people change for many different reasons. Sounds like this Dean guy has been affected a lot by the life he's living and his brother's death and it's changed him into this cold person who can do-away with a comrade easily. I felt you got that across rather well.
[The angels had gone and the Devil wouldn't deal.] Great line. Short and sweet!
[Something darker asks him what if it's your head he decides to puts that bullet in?] Loved this bit! Because it's true that it's so easy to think things like this, even about the people you're closest to. There is so much beneath the surface that even our loved ones don't see.
To say I know nothing about the fandom, I really enjoyed this, and that's because it's well written and explores an interesting situation and relationship between two people. A reflection on a friend by someone close to them, the sort of reflection that isn't entirely happy, where the bad points are picked up on rather than the good. Great little one-shot, or if you're continuing with it, first chapter.
| tangled sentence chapter 1 . 6/15/2013
It wasn't enough to get me into horrible fandoms, you had to rip my heart out afterwards. As if the damned show didn't do that on a regular basis. Thanks, Cas. You're a real pal. *tips hat sarcastically*
Overall, what I really love about your writing is the way you manage to make the emotions bleed through. I'm sure I've said this a million times already, but I'll reiterate. You have a knack for writing stories that always make me feel hollow. (Some day I'd like to see you write something non-painful, just to see if it would come through there as well, but I doubt you'll ever write something with a nice ending.) I like the simple details in your writing. The way you state everything about Sam, for instance. Cold, hard facts.
"The man he used to know; the man he fought beside, died for – the man he had loved, once – is gone." I really like the structure of this sentence. I mean, I have no idea if it's grammatically correct, but whatever. It really flowed well in my head, with the pauses and the connections.
"They fought – and when they lost Sam, they fought harder; always fighting to survive in a world that was already dead." I think you really have Dean's character here. I think a lot of people see him as some kind of doormat for Sam, but Dean didn't just lay down and die for nothing. He's more than that. And, even with his brother dead, I don't think he'd let himself die. He's too proud.
"They survived, but something had broken inside Dean, then, something fragile and irreplaceable, and Castiel sees the damage leaking through. " My favourite line in this piece. I just, I dunno, the implication that losing Sam is an infection that he can't cure really got me.
"He's anything but surprised – the man had screwed up once too many, and Dean had been itching to put a bullet in his head for weeks." *hands you my heart* Just take it, okay? You seem to enjoy ripping it out. Maybe you wanna eat it in front of me too? I have so many feels over End!verse Dean. I wish we had the chance to see more of what happened to him because, honestly, he turned into so much of a monster.
*cries all over your fic*
| DjinniFires chapter 1 . 6/14/2013
Ah, this scene is so bleak (which makes it so very Dean Winchester). Castiel's point-of-view, both sympathetic and objective at the same time, is well done. The description of Dean is nicely angsty and poetic with the use of complex, multi-clause sentences and images of something broken and something adrift without an anchor.
A few comments on wording:
Paragraph 4, sentence 3: "then" is a vague reference here. I think the word refers to Sam dying, but this is unclear because other events (Dean and Castiel fighting to survive) intervene. Also, "damage" is something visible in solids so it can't really "leak," which would be what a liquid would do. Maybe the wording should be "showing through"?
Paragraph 5: I think Dean would be giving his explanation to his "shocked companions" rather than to a "shocked expression." You could divide this thought into two sentences, i.e., Castiel seeing that Dean's explanation does not change the shocked expressions on his companions' faces? I *think* "once" should be changed to "one time too many," but I'm not sure.
Last paragraph: no comma after "this thing."
This is a good *opening* to a scene. Could you possibly expand on it based on the action a bit?
| Rosawyn chapter 1 . 6/3/2013
You say this is implied Dean/Cas, but that implication is pretty vague. Cas loves Dean; this is just a fact - even here, I see little to imply that he loved him in a "pairing" sort of way. It doesn't make the story any better as a story, but it might be a reasons certain people are reading/not reading. Possibly. I mean, there isn't even any kissing. :P I want kissing, damn it.
This thing is just so dark and depressing. But you probably already know I think that. But it is. Which is justified and everything, because 2014 End!verse was pretty freaking dark and depressing too. The one interesting thing here is that Cas doesn't seem to be drugged up on everything at the moment. Unless I'm just missing that? I know you mention in your A/N that there's no past!Dean, but I miss him. I loved how future!Cas liked past!Dean. I guess that's sort of the basis for this, though. Cas sees Dean turning into something else, and even though no past version of Dean shows up to remind him of who Dean had been, he still remembers who Dean used to be.
I do wonder, though, if a bullet in the head would even kill Cas, at least...permanently. I know logically it would, but in the show he doesn't seem to stay dead very well. And then it makes me wonder (as I often have) what happens to an angel when he dies - heaven? purgatory? Just...nothing?
Poor Cas, though. I wish past!Dean would come and give him a hug and tell him it's going to be okay. Not that past!Dean would even do that, but he should. :(