|Reviews for Battle Royale: Die With a Smile|
| Silver Medals chapter 9 . 11/12/2013
You referenced THG! :D
This was a great chapter, and you showed a lot of development.
| A Kitten With A Pen chapter 7 . 10/9/2013
*cries deeply* This was probably the saddest the thing I have read in awhile! I already knew the twist, but I'm still surprised about it! The chapter was great, Ally. I admit I don't remember who Tia was, but nonetheless, I was still upset about Tias death.
| tasherekalb chapter 6 . 9/21/2013
i loved this chapter i really feel sorry for them i mean finding out a boy likes u just before he is killed and your family too. but i wonder if they will die early as they will be seen as outsiders or put in the game to make people kill or if they will be overlooked...anyway i look forward to the next chapter
| A Kitten With A Pen chapter 6 . 9/7/2013
Aww, that was the most sweetest, sadist thing ever. You did a great job Lala. Poor Jittery and Viola.
| CountessMorgana chapter 6 . 9/4/2013
Sorry I haven't been about for a while. Real Life and all that.
I am still in shock over Tara from last chapter. Giggly girl and brutal killer. She's crazy in a likeable fashion, if that makes any sense. I'm reminded of Dexter (from the TV series) for background and Harley Quinn (from Batman) for personality. Was that intentional? It's certainly an intriguing mix! And anyone who quotes - or sings - Monty Python is all right in my book!
And now we know who's got Lettie's leash - the Prez himself!? Yikes! I didn't think this went all the way to the White House! You continue to surprise me, and I guess there's plenty of incentive to kill on national TV if there's essentially a Presidential pardon waiting at the end to absolve you.
The replacement girls surprised me, if only because no such provision exists in the original BRP. Students who die before the commencement of the Program are considered collateral damage. All three BR adaptions agree on this point, which is why I'm uncertain as to this turn of events. Unless the President is invoking some sort of "Screw the rules, I make them" mindset in deliberately punishing Lectitia.
The point of BR is to see how far will one go to stay alive when pitted against the very people and friends you've grown up with. These new girls are unknowns - where did they come from, did they attend the same school or classes as the Chosen, is there anything at all, any emotional or personal ties to invoke that pathos of indecision in killing the people you know and love, who in turn might round on you? Unless there's precedent for this sort of game change, I really don't think this should have happened.
More to say, but I haven't the space here. Aside from the above, good writing so far. Not outstanding but good. Here's hoping for focus on our classmates next run.
| jaffacakesyumm chapter 5 . 8/27/2013
And...always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the light side of life...
For life is quite absurd
And death's the final word
You must always face the curtain with a bow.
Forget about your sin - give the audience a grin
Enjoy it - it's your last chance anyhow.
you have that song in my head now!
Tara is crazy but for some reason I like her and I like the idea of the knife on the street lamp!
I think the gang is going to fall apart soon, by the sounds of it none of them trust of really like each other and Campbell seems to be thinking of something...
I love Kevin! I thought it was grate the way he tried to fool Ms. Leticia into thinking his dad was important
and I am glad you found out more about his character in this chapter.
I look forward to the next chapter
| Brooke Laurel chapter 5 . 8/23/2013
Gosh, I can't sign in...
Wonderful chapter, I must say! 'Acey-wacey' was a cute character, a strange one at that... Tara is teasing, (and it's only right that she got her cupcakes, phew) and that's a strange, interesting factor...
A lot of arrogants and recklessness on the non-primary side, I must say ('I must say' a lot of things today) , so that will be a 'strange, interesting factor'... Exciting. If I'm going to repeat things, I should at least add adjectives. This was the best chapter so far!
| The Rational Hatter chapter 5 . 8/24/2013
OH. MY. GOD. It's Tara!
And HOLY $HIT is she fcking crazy! Really crazy! I mean I know I said she was nuts but JEEZ booby-trapping the lamppost?! And taking out the eye too!? DAMN that is better than anything I could've rigged!
I don't know why I thought she'd be a bit saner than she is right now, and I wrote her! One kill down, so many more to go...
Keep posting? I'll keep an eye out!
| tasherekalb chapter 1 . 8/24/2013
I love the story!
my favourite character at the moment is Kevin he is so cute _
but I have a feeling that he will get killed by one of the gang maybe Campbell. I just know it will be sad :(
Natasha or ryan have not made much of appearance but on the plus side they are not dead...yet
can't wait for the next chapter as you are starting to introduce the killers like Tara. I just hope you bring more killers who have a reason for killing not just for fun but are just a deadly.
anyway good luck :)
| A Kitten With A Pen chapter 3 . 8/22/2013
Ally-love your mean, I was starting to like Cheyenne. :( Why do all the narcissist die first!?
| Silver Medals chapter 4 . 8/6/2013
Wunderbar! I loved this chapter, Brooke died! (No offense, I need deaths.) Although some creators' students' deaths have gone a bit unwritten..
| CountessMorgana chapter 4 . 8/6/2013
Bit pressed for time here, so I have to make this quick.
The end of the elite squad, a notion I was never comfortable with. And what a way to go! Well, serves them right. I'm willing to bet the boys won't last long. Especially Emmett. Double-crossing everyone else in front of said classmates? I doubt one of my characters would stick around long enough to snipe them, but I hope someone else does!
Is this BR going to be in a city? If it is, I feel sorry for nearly everyone. They don't call urban warfare the worst of them for no reason...
Awaiting your next instalment!
| Axe Smelling God chapter 4 . 8/6/2013
This is the former axe smelling god but i cant beileve that Brooke is dead she seemed so strong and i thought she would win actually
| The Rational Hatter chapter 3 . 7/27/2013
Ooh! Was not expecting that! Nice twist!
No sign of my girl, but I guess that's a good thing when there's unstable nutters with guns in the room.
Game's about to start! Yaaaaayyyy! And Tara's got cupcakes! At least, she should have cupcakes. Unless Leticia took them or something, sounds like a thing she'd do, nobody's allowed extra food rations... Right? *shrugs*
I almost thought Brooke was Tara at first, since they're both tiny blonde gymnasts. Is Brooke a cheerleader too? It'd be funny if she were or was at some point but quit!
So excited can't wait please update soon!
| CountessMorgana chapter 3 . 7/26/2013
I am quite enjoying this so far! Two things, however, I have issues with.
First, there's no such thing as a sonic grenade. There are concussion grenades that could work, but are limited in scope. The closer one is to the centre the harder one is hit with the concussive force. Even those within the outer circumference of the grenade's reach should have, at the very least, been hit with some fragments from the casing, and everyone by rights would be dead - these are lethal, pure and simple. Flashbangs are nonlethal, are designed to be reused, but work on overwhelming the targets' senses: the eyes via light and the ears (and balance) with the sound. The effect is meant to temporary and isn't meant to last more than minutes. You may well be looking for a chemical/gas grenade containing a soporific that knocked out everyone for them to be transported and set up the way depicted.
Secondly, as the overseer of the Program, Ms. Leticia by rights ought to be neutral. She cannot be seen to physically favour any of the students over the others. That's the whole point of Battle Royale - utter chance, random draws, survival of the fittest. Everyone is equal. The "winner" continues with his or her life as if nothing happened. Despite the superficial similarities, this isn't the Hunger Games. Nobody from the outside can sponsor, and most importantly, the administrators cannot interfere or intervene. They can taunt, they can tease, they can verbally and physically abuse their victims. But, and this is the most important part - only when they absolutely have no choice in order to keep the game going, do they resort to the kill.
We can all agree that Leticia is crazy, freaking bipolar schizophrenic knife-edge crazy. Anyone in her place would have to be in some form. That said, I do not agree with her "demonstration". Nor I do agree with Emmett's plot. By rights, he should be dead - the overseer in the person of Leticia is sacrosanct/untouchable because without her There Is. No. Program. That's why there are armed guards when the students are brought in and "briefed"; precisely to prevent any kind of "uprising" and ending the whole thing before it can even begin. Emmett should be little more than a bloody bullet-ridden corpse right now, and the fact that he's not - the fact that he's trying to dictate terms before the start and skew the odds into his favour - that really turns me off.
You had a great premise, an excellent beginning, loads of fascinating characters. I sincerely hope that the plot will get better. Otherwise, there's really no point.
PS. Cheyenne's death didn't bother me so much. Nothing like seeing firsthand in living colour just what those collars will do to you if you don't give it your all to steel people into the right mindset.