you think they would have had dumbles kissed funny part of that being he is gay and dementors all sort of look male.

where the fuck is bones

I am really interested in how you handle Hermione and Daphne's first time with Harry. I hope it is more detailed than the vague hints that you have supplied so far. It does not have to be smut or dirty. Sex is a natural activity and can be described with decorum and taste.

This is a very well written story, I truly enjoy seeing it written where there is someone who is competent in the ministry and simply needed to be informed of what was going on in order to act. Truly it’s enjoyable to see the champions banding together when even they understood that the tournament was ridiculous to continue with when it’s obvious that it had been compromised.

Really look forward to the remaining chapters and hope your muse speaks to you about this one. Thanks!

I just discovered this story, and after reading through all the chapters that have currently been put up I have to say it’s really very well written. And yes I include the final chapter in that. I’m looking forward to seeing what more comes up in the story. Thank you so much for a wonderful read.

The only issues I have are with spelling, and grammar. Aside from this, I love the story so far. Hope the small errors don't stop you from enjoying writing.

more please keep typing and please reply

i hope you get better soon and to me the quality is just as good as its always been. i really enjoyed this story it was a nice read very smooth and i sincerely hope you can update sometime soon with a positive update on your health

inrteting and romantic but agian few quesitons
ok how has harry never saw her name on the map before and how does everyone know the name riddle is bad?i doesnt make sense also if hermione is so fast rivaling harry or surpassing him how come she couldnt dodge the cutter and harry had to save her? for becca why didnt harry just put her under his protection from the jump?

nice cute sweet and interesting but
how could she be a small fourth year when harry in fourth year ? dont you mean first year? also when was she sorted? surly harry would of heard about her by now unless dumbledore did a private sorting? also how does everyone know about riddle? wouldnt the purebloods be up in arms if everyones knows? also he doesnt have glasses any more no scarcruxs no eye problems

if katie was next to harry while on victor lap and draco was next to harry and luna was now next to victor/katie how could they be sitting across the table from katie and flitwick? also wasnt luna on harry team why was she and ginny then later attack him?

hermione put the sliencing chamr up twice when ones meant to be the locking charm as well .

nice chapter

when harry was 'summoning siruis wouldnt he of written wormtail prongspeed instead sicne that would be code for danger need response fast?

I like this story please continue

Ok, so in terms of grammar I've definitely seen worse. The biggest issue that I can see is the lack of proper punctuation at the start of your sentences. Most of the characters are very OOC, but I appreciate that this is a fanfiction and as such you have the creative liberty here.

Overall the largest problem by far is the story telling. Believe me I know how tempting it is to just jump right into the action while writing a story and bypass all the tedious buildup, but it is still very necessary. New characters, villains and plot points keep getting suddenly introduced out of nowhere, only to then be disposed of quite as fast as they came.

And the repetitive nature of these plot-points really doesn't help at all: new character gets introduced, talks about tragic past, new villain gets introduced, they try to ruin new characters life, Harry and friends confront new villain, new villain insults Hermione, Hermione cries, Harry gets mad, New villain tries and fails to commit murder and then Sirius arrests new villain who we don't hear from ever again.

In your future writing endeavors, and I truly do hope that you continue to write, I recommend having just one or two consistent primary antagonists and a more solid plot. Or if you just want to write a fluffy slice of life kind of story then you don't necessarily need such high stakes any way.