I just thought I'd point out as I've just now noticed even though I've cold a lot of the "build up" you've done pointless which it is as you just make them as strong as you want for a set moment but I just now notice... anyone can skip the first 12 chapters of your story and it'll do jackshit to it. You have flash backs to crap we've litarely just read which makes it nul an void, and all the "training" you had ichigo do amounted to fuck all? Because the main abilities you had him training he can no longer do? Even if get rid of them is impossible you still did it and there fall us sitting through three chapters reading jackshit as he trained was pointless? And I don't mean in an insulating way it was literally pointless because he can't use that ability you had us reading about and him training so it's a plot point that's lead no where

Even though you've boosted Halibel power by a lot by your own admission you're making her once again struggle against bloody Toshiro? Who by all accounts has done the exact same as canon? She was dominating in their fight on canon but you've dumbed her power down so much she's now struggling? She should of curb stomped the half pint even "holding back" all that power up litarely useless

The Getsuga Tenshou isn't the same as a cero it's a power he inherited from the Shiba line it's why he's dad can do it and "gasp shock the horror" his dad isn't a fuckin hollow! He doesn't have a hollow he's pure soul reaper! Getsuga Tenshou is their blades ability there for even hollow he should be able to use it, it just wouldn't be as strong because it's a soul reaper power not hollow

In all honesty I don't mind ichigo not having memory but I believe you should of started the story here with flash backs and glimpses at what happened that way we would know what ichigo knows it'd be far more interesting to read then the last 19 chapters being pretty much useless

He actually left his blade?... How retarded are you making this ichigo? No seriously how much did you dumb him down? All that training all those instincts go to waste for him to do something so infinity retarded! They know that both of them have been ordered to not harm him he can have nel beat the shit out of teson if he gets to close and there's nothing he can do unless he wants to piss off aizen! They have all the power in that position complete brain dead moron!

...I have to keep reminding myself this is your first story... The idea is fine if not completely strangely thrown together and making absolutely no sense what so ever. Spelling is fine for the most part but you struggle with the easiest parts like you rushed every chapter out as fast as you possibly could. Because there's words missing sentences switching without reason people saying shit that makes no sense what so ever like answering a question that was never asked at all. Did you just copy the manga then splice it together with your own writing like a freaky Frankenstein story.

It's constantly making me question my sanity and why I keep bloody reading.

But besides that your characters for better words suck their interactions only feel normal when something is "serious" everything else is just so wooden and pointless

"Oh I hint at sex" someone blushed blood explodes and they faint... That's not how someone reacts! It's not fun to read in manga what made you think it was fun in this? And then you add on to the fact that so many characters are so OOC it's not even funny... There's a lot and I mean a LOT wrong but as first go...eh I'll give it a 5 maybe, but that's hoping your story picks up but if it's like this for more then the next 10 chapters... Ima dip

Haven't read this yet but I really hand to point out he wasn't actually told how to travel vie garganta or how ever the hell it's spelt so theoretically he should instantly fall into the endless void not knowing what the fuck to do not knowing to make a platform... Congratulations you just got rid of ichigo far easier then aizen ever could

You should think about what he says all he was told was that he couldn't talk to anyone that means technically he could leave a note, he never says he can't interact with anyone just that he couldn't talk he never said he can't see anyone just can't talk... There's a lot of holes there

Why are all the guys so pathetic over such a thing?... No one actually acts like that and it's not fun or entertaining to read. It's just sad and annoying I now see why that guy in the reviews said he skipped all your dialog because it's stupid, I doubt he's the only one either I know I'm about to join him with how retarded every male in this story is, it's like reading a bunch of 13 year olds act like adult and failing

I haven't fully read this chapter but what the fuck... I don't know if you've left fanfiction or not but I don't care, because you really need to fix this chapter that whole arm this with chad is so damn confusing you kept switching arms and by the end of it, it felt like Chad had six arms! The actual hell?

Also they don't fade from existence when killed well unless killed by a Quincy but they destroy anything's soul when they kill it's why the soul reapers killed them...or at least tried to lmao they just rejoin the well of souls to be given a new life they had a full episodes explaining that with how a soul reapers blade purified hollow and not killing them

Chad's shield is in his right arm not left I'm pretty sure... And there's a really messed up line near the beginning can't remember what it is or where is is but just look you'll see it it's something like "I won't is this" like you tried started the line two different ways.

And lastly, you made him 13? Are you batshit crazy? I can think of 5 that have proven themselves stronger then this dude and you make him 13!?... I don't believe that one moment not at all this did is paper-mache compared to some we've seen all this guy has is he can shoot shit out his blade...that's it!

I never liked the whole Karin and Toshiro thing for one I thought it was pretty forced even in canon and two... TOSHIRO IS OVER 50! He's older then ichigo and Karin put together! Yea but that's a large NO from me not into that pedo shite

good

Great fanfic haha was worth the time I spent, a sequel would definitely be appreciated. To be honest the ending definitely fit someone like Aizen hahaha, he easily fooled them.

i lost interest when he became and arrancar.