|Reviews for In the Darkness|
| jordanwardle11 chapter 5 . 10/4/2013
Good story but will there be more
| WeaverOfFate chapter 1 . 7/12/2013
Interesting take on the beginning. I love this game, and I wanta know more about this so please continue writing
| kaji21 chapter 4 . 7/12/2013
Impressive so far. I wonder where you'll take this?
| TheVeteran chapter 4 . 7/12/2013
Wow. This is really good!
| BenignViewer chapter 4 . 7/10/2013
Ah, the old cliff hanger ending. Hope you post the next chapter especially soon. Although a funny thing about planes is that unless they are pushed into a dive, they actually continue to glide for quite a long distance, and in funny 'up and down' motion. Also - the faster a plane gets, the easier and more inclined it is to pull up, especially at lower altitutdes (where air is denser), unless, once again, the nose is pointed directly at teh ground. As a physics student, (and a fan of the Canadian show ACI) I'm a bit of a stickler for plane details, and it was unclear what the exact crisis the plane was in (other than the shooting and infected on board) that lead for it to begin crashing - even breaking one or both engines, with auto pilot still enabled, would not cause the plane los control, merely begin a gradual and turbulent gliding descent.
Also the ground proximity warning system (GPWS) does not, nor has nto ever produced a "Warning! Pull up!" GPWS system on all commercial planes (of which the learjet would be one) adheres to the following standard warnings, which are:
Excessive descent rate ("SINK RATE" "PULL UP")
Excessive terrain closure rate ("TERRAIN" "PULL UP")
Altitude loss after take off or with a high power setting ("DON'T SINK")
Unsafe terrain clearance ("TOO LOW – TERRAIN" "TOO LOW – GEAR" "TOO LOW – FLAPS")
Excessive deviation below glideslope ("GLIDESLOPE")
Excessively steep bank angle ("BANK ANGLE")
Windshear protection ("WINDSHEAR")
So if they (Joel and Ellie) entered a steep dive on the plane, they would first hear the "SINK RATE" "PULL UP" warning, followed by "TERRAIN" "PULL UP" once they got close to the ground (which takes some time, at least two minutes, when nosediving under full power from 30000-35000 feet (standard cruising altitude).
So yeah, forgive my being so anal about it, but I'm a bit of a plane nut, and I like to see the details being used correctly.
Other than that flaw, the rest of the chapter was great. Your writing and pacing is energetic without feeling rushed, and the cliifhanger, on both Sarah and Tommy's and Joel and Ellie's part has me waiting anxiously for more. Your action sequences are once again, great to read, and capture the desperation of each struggle faced against the infected. Your grammar, too, is practically perfect too, and it makes for a great read. I loved the way you interwove and manipulated the game's original opening events in addition to all this. The scene of Sarah searching, alone in the house, was especially gripping for me, and thus far is my personal favourite from your story over all. You did it, the game and its characters great justice.
All in all - good work, keep it up, please tweak your plane details (if you can), update soon, and my best wishes;
| deadvermin chapter 3 . 7/9/2013
Love it so far, update soon
| BenignViewer chapter 3 . 7/2/2013
Brilliant; as well written as the chapters before. Some very nice character development thus far, you are doing them all justice, and what's more the obvious foreshadowing meshes perfectly with teh scene setting which has me anticipating the next chapter all the more! I hope for my sake, you manage to update again soon XD.
All the best;
| BenignViewer chapter 2 . 6/28/2013
That wa a really intense chapter, adrenaline filled and action packed. It had a real Matthew Reilly feel to it, and you portrayed the action very well. Just as entertaining as the action was, so too were Tommy and Sarah's family moments - touching in their normalcy and a great counterpoint ot the developments surrounding Joel. And all the while, the plot progresses beyond even the characters' cnotrol as the infection begins to spread. All is set for the apocalypse to come flooding over the beaches, the hills and the streets of the world.
A very well structured and delivered chapter, with nary a spelling mistake of mispunctuation within. It has built on the uncertain grounds of your first chapter (prologue?) and now everything is poised for the third entry. I'll admit, I had reservations about how could this story could be, your opening chapter began on quite the turning point, but I am very impressed with how you have continued it, and am very glad you have done so in this manner.
Outstanding so far!
| Kaioo chapter 2 . 6/28/2013
Damn son, this is good reading. Keep up the good work.
| UnderminetheAuthority chapter 2 . 6/28/2013
Looking good! I can't wait to see how everything ties together with this new plot! You had better keep Sarah alive, though xP
| BenignViewer chapter 1 . 6/24/2013
This has a lot of promise. Well wrtten thus far, structured and formatted nicely to boot! You kept it true to where the game left off and have dealt admirably with the harsh, dark reality of the post apocalypse, and post Fireflies incident world. Would love to read more from you. Keep it up.
As a side note - this game will undoubtedly be game of the year. It is the best game I've played all-round of the modern era. It has the best story I've seen since the great classic games past of Final Fantasy VII and The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time. The list of 'most shocking moments in Video Game histoy' has a new entry no doubt, and the Last of Us should in my opinion, proudly hold the number 2 spot (behind Aerith's death). If you want to discuss, debate, wax poetic or even rave like a fanboy about the game, feel free to PM me P [I would also be happy to further discuss this story, but, after finishing the game... well, you know ;)].
All the best;