|Reviews for A Third Path to the Future|
| tamagat chapter 20 . 17h
HUNKA HUNKA BURNING LOVE!
| thedwo chapter 27 . 10/24
Chapter 27 brings up an inconsistency - You have the Hellion as a Light Fist/Frigate. In this chapter that's '5 fighter jets long' which puts it between 50 and 100 m, depending on the exact fighter (although 50 is more like the early jet fighters, rather then modern). However, way back when the Hellion first appeared, it was about 1/2 a mile long. Not only a size difference, but a strength difference in terms of boarding actions as well (in that you implied almost everyone but Jean or Harry would have to board it to destroy it) but here you have Johnny disabling one from the outside, seemingly easily. The larger size also makes more sense in terms of how much effort it took them to take the ship back then.
Or did you change it so that a Frigate meant Fast Fist instead of a Light Fist?
Also, you seem to be bouncing around with 'Heavy Cruiser' and 'Battle Cruiser.' Are they the same thing?
| Sphygmus chapter 28 . 10/23
Love the story. Just one thing, the adaptable armour from the Sentinels that can become immune to certain attacks after being exposed to it. If its used on the ships, should make them immune to enemy weapon fire, giving them a huge advantage.
Don't let them forget about it, as usually happens where the good guys get something but don't ever use it again or exploit it.
| Fainfan chapter 9 . 10/22
Wow. I'm hooked on your Long chapters
| thedwo chapter 25 . 10/23
So, I'm not really liking how your space battles in chapter 25 went, what with Jean so easily smashing through 18 ships. Basically, either Jean is absurdly overpowered, or the Kree starships are pathetically weak.
I get that the Phoenix could do that easily, but Jean is not the Phoenix, and more importantly, giving her that level of power kinda limits the story on Earth. Sure, you might be able to say that Jean can't go all out without massive collateral damage on a planet, but with the weapons fire the Kree sent her way, there really shouldn't be anyone able to do any damage to her either.
I suppose with the way the battle goes in chapter 26, you could just say that, despite being somewhere between centuries and millennia more advanced then us, their spaceships are pretty pathetic compared to what the high end earthers (like Jean or Doom) can do. But that still seems weird, since you gave Doom the ability to one shot a battlecruisers shields, from his man sized armor.
In that vein, with Harry's latest battle (with Thanos) he really needs to come up with high end, single target spells. This is something like the third time he's found out his 'mid-level' spells are useless and his high level spells seem to all be area of effect spells that he can't use around anyone else. Thanos and Doom clearly have single target attacks that didn't seem to have any AoE, so it is clearly possible. It's basically getting to the point where it's starting to negatively effect the story when he's always limiting himself like that. Especially because, in this story at least, magic is incredibly versatile compared to every other power other people use. It'd be different if it was some limitation of his power, like he could only make explosions, which clearly have a wider blast radius the more power was put into one, but that's not his power.
| Fainfan chapter 2 . 10/20
Awe snap. This is a nice chapter
| newboy chapter 28 . 10/15
I just wanted to say that I really do enjoy this story and look forward to more chapters, if anyone of your reviewers dislikes this story, that is there own problem. I have noticed a couple of new reviewers, I am surprised at some of the more negative comments they have, just ignore them in my opinion.
I am also curious if Emma Steed will ever wake up from that coma or not, that problem has kind have been left hanging for a lot of chapters, I am curious if a resolution will be found?
| Guest chapter 1 . 10/15
Type your review for this chapter here...After reading your first chapter of this fic.I've got to say i'm impress or maybe more than impressed with was actually fantastic with the get together,though i was wondering you would like doing a Harry or Ranma/Dc universe fic may be with the Flash TV Series,Arrow or Smalliville. And yes i know you got alot in your hands, feel free to do any of them at your own leisure
| Simianpower chapter 11 . 10/14
You really need to work on your numbers, man. They're even more nonsensical than JKR's. Last I remember, Harry had something under $4M. Let's start from there. He buys up THIRTY-EIGHT PERCENT of Stark Industries at $100k/percent. Now, Stark Industries is basically THE arms company. In the real world, Raytheon is only AN arms company and they are worth $40 BILLION dollars. So I'd assume that Stark Industries is worth at least $200 billion or so before Tony fucks with it. So $400M/percent. If he's buying it at $100k/percent, that means that the stock has fallen by a factor of around 4000 and is far, far worse than a junk stock. Not only that, but buying 38 percent means he spent (even at this ridiculous rate) $3.8M of his money, all on a company that was in freefall. And then gave away about a third of it to a girl he has been around for maybe a day and a half. If you're not seeing how ludicrous all of this is, then there's no point in continuing the discussion.
As a side note, Harry conjures a 6'x'6x1' slab of metal and later says that conjuring enough for a suit would wreck him? Really? He's like 5'4" and absolutely does NOT need foot-thick armor wrapped around him three times. Also, "discovering" that someone can't dent foot-thick metal isn't much of a discovery. If he had conjured a quarter-inch thick plate and she couldn't dent it, that would be a different story, but honestly!
You say you hate plot holes, but your numbers often leave several large ones. It's careless.
With all of these issues, and the fact that the story is SO... PAINFULLY... SLOW, I fear I've just lost interest. Couldn't even finish this chapter. You could be a good writer if you actually edited your work for content, wordiness, and general plot coherence, but since this seems to be unedited train-of-thought it winds up being rather mediocre. I'll give it 6/10 because it kept my interest this long.
| salsas100 chapter 9 . 10/12
It's a bit slow though. The almost d'au to day timeline is a bit tiring. The story is interesting, but kinda lost in the writings if you get what I mean.
| salsas100 chapter 12 . 10/12
So far I like what I've read. Harry's for the middle road, but I guess that's the hardest path. The better one though. I like your "opened" storm
| Simianpower chapter 9 . 10/12
So, runes, which takes wizards from Harry's 'verse 5 years to learn to use effectively, takes Kitty Pryde about 3 weeks of off-and-on training WITHOUT having a magical core. Yeah. That makes sense. You have this problem that you do day-by-day descriptions of events, resulting in a very slow timeline, and yet have massive progress being made at the same time. Instead of saying "the next few days passed the same way", and picking up 2-3 days later, why not replace days with weeks, or months? One of the few things that JKR did well was allow time to pass. Sure, she described very little of what her students were actually learning, and thus after 5-6 years they had only 10-15 spells in their arsenals, but at least she allowed the time to learn occur. You're skipping the learning part and going straight to the success part and it's very unrealistic.
Also, capitalized underlined spells now? But only sometimes? That's just ugly writing. Though BUBBLEHEAD CHARM had me laughing. Not so much with you, but still. And turning the floor to custard was actually funny.
I also think you're vastly overpowering a "magnetic shield" against magic. Magic isn't magnetic. Hell, telekinesis isn't magnetic. Lightning and fire are plasma, so I can see the shield stopping them, but BOMBARDA isn't, nor is a telekinetic fist pulling Eric's helmet off. Writers always overpower Magneto because otherwise he's extremely vulnerable to anything non-ferrous. But it's always annoying. Throwing out words like "shield" is too simplistic when you realize that it's NOT a Starship Enterprise shield, but rather more of a superstrong Van Allen Belt. It can stop radiation, plasma, possibly even light (though that usually requires gravity), but NOT a lot of other things like ceramics, thoughts, direct manipulations or transfigurations, etc. Your Magneto is ridiculous.
| Simianpower chapter 7 . 10/11
How did Emma, who was driving her Ferrari in Italy, take a private jet home to New York and then drive in her Ferrari? Does she have two? Or was this private jet large enough to carry a sports-car across the Atlantic? (Unlikely, that last.)
| Simianpower chapter 5 . 10/11
That was a good chapter. Harry treating X as Dumbles is actually pretty fair. Both have a huge blind spot with regards to actually killing enemies. In comics it makes sense because comic writers are lazy and don't want to keep coming up with new villains, so instead they just keep recycling the old ones. But in a realistic character it's absolutely stupid.
| Simianpower chapter 4 . 10/11
This is getting better, but it's extremely SLOW. It's also unfortunate that you started with the teeny-bopper version from the later cartoon rather than the X-Men cartoon, but I can sort of understand why. It just lends itself to stupidity too easily, with tons of mutants all at the same high school.