Reviews for The First Movement of the Odyssey
Chris chapter 8 . 3/8
Ok this beast has a lot of problems. The first of which is a cast of thousands, secondly you don't need to explain everything to the reader, chaces are that every reader is aware of the story arcs in SG1 and Halo, so you only need to alude to them. Third you need to decide the direction you are going with this story, because you are including everything, as far as I can see there is no story path.

Decide on a story path, i can't make that decision for you, but i can give you a path: my personal preference would be, the Odyssey jumps to s new universe, protects Reach, there is a tech exchange and the Odyssey gets to go home, Halo forces defeat the Covenssnt because of the new tech, Sg1 defeats the Ori because of the new manufacturing capabilities of Earth.

You need to reduce the amount of charaters you are talking about and only include scenes that make sence for the story. You probably could have written a superb story with just 50k words.

That is just my 2 cents worth.
Chris
MrScorch chapter 7 . 12/11/2023
Easiest way to kill my interest in Halo fic is to get on the ONI-Paragonsky-secret-inside-secret Karen Traviss clownfiesta. Just details the whole story, even worse when it's still during the war. Postwar I can somewhat understand the would-be Sangheili sabotage and Osman being mad child soldier puppet, but during the war it makes little sense to divide UNSC this way.

Anyway, liked the rest of the story, hope someone someday maybe continues this further.
Guest chapter 8 . 12/6/2023
Someone should finish this. Dude's either dead or married to a Halo hater. We need an end, this pilgrimage we keep making is pointless.
taintedahab chapter 8 . 5/8/2023
It’s too bad this story died, it was really well written
kirosyamcha chapter 7 . 12/23/2022
In general I like the story it’s just that I find most of the pure halo bits boring, not that they aren’t well written it’s just I think I’d Prefer more Stargate crew involved stuff probably.
LordVladhe chapter 8 . 6/12/2022
You know. I come back to this story and reread it every so often. Over a dozen times through the years and it always breaks my heart that it was abandoned. Author has such a talent for describing things. Shame that it ended.
Guest chapter 8 . 10/11/2021
It has been quite a long time since anything has been added to this story.
I do hope that more chapters will be forth coming soon.
Mugen-Muse chapter 2 . 9/16/2021
Hm, I wonder if the discreet leak of information might have been the result of some time travel event that hasn't quite happened yet.
ShadoWARmadaN chapter 8 . 7/19/2021
more please
ShadoWARmadaN chapter 4 . 7/18/2021
hahaha the face on the covenant when they run Odyssey threw a translator...
Guest chapter 5 . 5/24/2021
Roland clearly displayed in halo 4 that emergency use AI codes don’t really work that well.
scyfly chapter 7 . 3/24/2021
yeah this is bullshit, the tech of the unsc is only usefull in the sense that earth does not need to develop it but with the AI thor and their databanks this is negligible. no the only thing the unsc can offer thst is of use is their history of how earth unified under one banner, the economic hastle that will be alone is invaluable if you have a counterpart to compare it with
scyfly chapter 6 . 3/24/2021
ohh and to add the icing on top, your sollution is to decide to disarm your own weapons and make the unsc dependant on your naquada. that is not a sollution but a stop gap messure at best
scyfly chapter 6 . 3/24/2021
seriously the idea that the asgard rely only on naquada for energy and room temprature conducters is rediculous hell replicater blocks count as a superconducter and batteries and these things can be made of any kind of metal. as for the energy requirements of the synthesiser the obvious solutions would be a dyson sphere.

what i never got is why sgc never took the asgard tech to the next level, because smart those guys may be but they know jack squat of war and utility. i mean stones to opperate your ships?

so yeah you shouldve build a dyson sphere big enough to supply energy, then use this to fuel the synthesisers and put together a whole new ship. the hull of replicaterblocks made of nutronium the engines nutrino ion from the asgard. as for weaponry... well there is no such thing as a one size fits all weapon so diversity is the key. small plasma canons, large plasma beams, railguns(mac's), drones-phaseshifter-hyperspace(if an x-302 can jump past shields...)-nukes, and instead of x-302 drones contolled by an AIbasicly drone swarms like from stargate universe, the whole ship needs to have neural connection chairs(with seatbelts!) and plenty of replicators for repair work. if an small ship like the oddessy could be so powerful imagne what a 10km big ship could do(about 50 times bigger)
you can downgrade all this to goauld level and have the unsc give their ship wrecks and turn out whole new ships in likely days time.

ofc it would also be smart to create a cloning device and give yourself the best possible human body you can get, meaning alteran. because why not have super bodies. spartan armor advanced? bah human form replicators turned into suits wouldnt even need shields.

see what i mean with plain under utilizing technology?
scyfly chapter 4 . 3/24/2021
this is filled with random tangents and is far far to long for it. like just about everyone else you fastly underultilize asgard tech and on top of that make a lot of tactical mistakes in battle that are nothing short of plain stupid.

so its to long to skim for the fun stuf and to dumb to read it all
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