|Reviews for She is the Light|
| usuihentai727 chapter 3 . 9/26/2013
Great story...but it would have been better if they ended up in the same house...
Oh, can you make this story Neville/Lucille? I haven't seen many stories of Neville/OC, and he's a great character...OH, and Luna's friend, next year? She's really cool!
Anyway, PLEASE UPDATE SOON! :D
| PureAngelEyes chapter 3 . 9/6/2013
Awwww poor Lucy, thought she'd be in the same house?..hope Harry doesn't have a heart attack by thinking he won't be able to protect his sister like he told himself he would. Can't wait to read more :)
| xXMizz Alec VolturiXx chapter 3 . 8/14/2013
really good start! this is going to be interesting. Ive never read a story were she was placed in Hufflepuff! Please go on! Lucille/Theo
| Matt Guthrie chapter 3 . 8/14/2013
"Acid Pops" Hahaha, that's a funny password.
Once again, you've done a great job taking the story and making it your own. :) This chapter was definitely worth waiting for.
| guest chapter 2 . 8/13/2013
love the story :) please update soon!
| Matt Guthrie chapter 2 . 8/6/2013
All I can say so far is this: WOW!
Your technical storytelling is very good, and you're not just rewriting the whole story word for word, with Lucille's lines thrown into the mix.
But where you're really succeeding right now is by making me care about Harry and Lucille. I was sickened by Vernon's abuse of Lucille, and I was totally surprised by the forced consumption of alcohol thing. It adds insult to injury how he would always force Harry to listen to the whole spectacle. The truly heartbreaking thing is that Harry seems well aware that Vernon may start raping Lucille before too long. He's only ten. He shouldn't know about such a thing at that age.
I'm totally following this story. It's heartbreaking, and I love it.
| The Endless Hourglass chapter 2 . 8/6/2013
Another excellent chapter. )
The bond between Harry and Lucy is coming along nicely, and I'm really excited for the next few chapters. I really liked how Harry told her sister to stay there, and she only came out because she trusted him. That's a big thing with my sisters and I. We always trust that we're telling each other the truth and that we can trust one another in freaky or nervous situations. And as for secrets, we share nearly everything together and trust that they will keep the secret.
Dumbledore was in character, I'm glad to say, and his reactions were what I would have expected. The one thing I'm not so sure about is making Harry go back to the Dursleys - surely Dumbledore would have decided that the Dursleys were too harsh and abusive? But, other than that, I really like that ending scene as well. It really touched my heart. ) I can't wait to see what houses they get sorted into!
Can't wait for the next update!
- The Endless Hourglass, may time be with you.
| xxxMadameMysteryxxx chapter 2 . 8/6/2013
Like were this is going so far, can't wait 4 the next chapter so plz update soon : )
| wolfgirl263 chapter 1 . 8/5/2013
Well you've definetly caught my interest. Definetly going to keep reading.
| The Endless Hourglass chapter 1 . 8/5/2013
I really don't understand what made me read this. Like, honestly, I think I just wanted to see if this was the same old same old, but since you already pointed out that this would be different, I continued, and boy was I glad. This story has a lot of potential, something I rarely say about this type of plot.
I am overjoyed. The fact that Lucy is so far not a Mary-Sue and that you realistically put Harry in the big-brother situation makes me jump with excitement. You can spell and punctuate better than most fanfiction writers, and the length is over 1,000 words. Also, I am eager to learn more about the personalities of the twins. They sound interesting.
McGongall was a perfect character to use in this place. When people use Snape, they walk a fine line that they usually stumble over in the end. However, McGongall had suspicions from the beginning, so it makes more since that she would check up on them.
There are, of course, a few things to improve on. Luckily for you, they're small. ) Don't be afraid to make another paragraph, because some lazy readers will just go away if the paragraphs are too long. It also makes your story seem longer and more professional. I like to keep paragraphs under four lines if I can help it. Sometimes, I understand, you cannot.
I would like to suggest something. Once upon a time in this story, go back to before they were eleven so we can see more of why Harry became the big brother to Lucy. Explain more how Vernon got the idea of using Lucy against Harry. It makes perfect sense right now, but it could be explained even further for an even more emotional bond between them. This is just a suggestion though, I don't believe that you must be forced to use it. )
As a triplet, I understand this 'connection' quite well. These things include reading each other's expressions really well, saying similar/the same things at the same time. And - especially since they are in this situation - having to know exactly where the other is after classes and such. So maybe it would be cool to dwell a little more on that. ) Not saying you won't do good otherwise - you seem like an awesome writer with amazing talent.
I'm going to favorite this story (which pretty much means I'm following it minus the e-mail notice) and I think I'm going to continue reading it. As you promised, this is way better than the others, and I'm curious to see where it goes. ) And I'm not forcing you to use any of those suggestions - I think I'm just in a rambling/babbling mood today. XD
- The Endless Hourglass, may time be with you.