Reviews for The Brig
Guest chapter 1 . 5/3/2013
the words seem really cramped. I find myself reading the same sentence twice then missing one, it's a little confusing
noxfiction chapter 1 . 12/27/2010
I have read this fic a few times over the last few years and I lvoe it every time. I don't want to seem ungrateful for the lovely writing, but this would be a lot easier to read if it was broken up into paragraphs. I have to copy it into a word document and split it up myself in order to appreciate it.

I love the brief bits of back story you give, especially about how Miguel and Tulio first met. They are a lot more realistic than in other El Dorado fics I've read. Your writing is great, and I would love to see more.
kissfromarose9 chapter 1 . 8/25/2010
this was a heartbreaking but necessary insight. your writing is appreciated.
Zellezra chapter 1 . 7/7/2009
Fantastic, truly. I love your style of writing; it flows so naturally. The scenes are lively, emotional and captivating. I really enjoyed this.
Mr. Gregor Samsa chapter 1 . 2/9/2009
Nice story.

The big wall-o-text was kind of intimidating, and hard to read, but it was captivating.
Guardian Fox chapter 1 . 7/12/2008
I would advise you to edit this so that there are seperate paragraphs, this makes MUCH easier to read. I get overwhelmed, and i'm sure others do too, when i stumble upon fanfics written like yours where the entire story is one big paragraph, it is too confusing and compromises the effect of the story. It is also difficult for me to keep my place when reading as i go down to the next line.

But i like it. You did a good job and everything fits well with the original story line. I always wondered how that floging might have gone... and now i know! :)
Frozen-Void chapter 1 . 7/10/2007
dude y have GOT to SPACE
sami1010220 chapter 1 . 6/18/2005
*sniff* how sad. great job!
empath89 chapter 1 . 10/11/2004
that's so sad, but it's beautifully written. i love it.
Evilstrawberry chapter 1 . 10/5/2003
Wow, that was a gret story! I know everyons already said it but, paragraphs? Very good fic!
Tinselcat chapter 1 . 2/4/2003
I see you've been having the same problems uploading text that I have: namely, that all the paragraphs dissappear. I find that if I go through and double-space between each paragraph, they show up in the uploaded document. Just a tip. it's a pain in the arse, but it works.

as for the story, I thought it was excellent. You incorporate theories about Miguel's and Tulio's past into the story, which is always a good idea when writing about characters whose pasts are not very well known. it makes the story and characters richer. your descriptions of action and feeling are well-balanced. I would suggest paying more attention to setting, but I don't think this story needs it terribly, since we are familiar with that setting already.

now it's time for me to bother you about a sequel! I'm a slasher, at least for this story, to the bitter end, and I believe that these two characters would (and should)end up together eventually, regardless of Chel. I would love to read another fic of yours, especially if it refers back to this one, and helps the characters deal with the scars from their ordeal. pretty please? anyway, great job!
Funky Funky Usopp chapter 1 . 1/3/2003
ohhhh that was a hard en to read all right but twas a good one at the same time. :) me hopes you maybe do a sequal?
Aldonza chapter 1 . 12/3/2002
Wow, great concept. But please don't hurt me for saying what everyone else has said... *cough*split paragraphs*cough* But besides that... it was really good. I could feel the pain... owee...
Zarla chapter 1 . 10/27/2002
Wow. Very deeply emotional and well written, but in desperate need of separate paragraphs. That's da only advice I could give fer this. Other then that, wow.
HMC chapter 1 . 10/23/2002
Wow! Fabulous! Very emotional.

One suggestion? Separate your paragraphs. Not only does it make the story easier to read, but most of the times it adds to dramatic effect if done in a certain way. I'll beta it for you?
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