|Reviews for Strong Black Vine|
| LizziePaige chapter 1 . 2/5
Love the story but boy, she let him off waaaay too easy!
| BelieveItOrNot chapter 1 . 11/17/2013
This is filled with beautiful prose, but it does so much more than just look pretty. It shows a story. I felt like I was in the story. I wasn't an outsider looking in, I was experiencing it. There was only one point when I was made to feel like an outsider and that was during one of his flashbacks when he thinks: "Speaking of my wife..." Just during those four words, I felt like I was being talked to rather than shown. And that is a perfectly fine way to tell a story, but it seemed slightly out of place in a story so well-drawn it made me a part of it - it was otherwise very nearly a deep first person perspective. But that is such a small thing in the spectrum of the great writing throughout this story.
I did think that Bella had died, but when I found out she hadn't, Jasper's harsh words to Edward made so much more sense. It's like, Okay, that was almost foreshadowing. Why would Jasper not understand Edward's grief? Because a lot of his grief he put on himself by forcing his wife away.
I feel like this is a concept some readers might have a problem with. Why? Because Edward is supposed to love and be loyal to Bella and how can he kick her out of his life when she needs him the most? How? Because of grief. It does strange things to people's minds and relationships. Awful things. Poor baby was not only grieving for his mother, he was living with the guilt of responsibility as well as survivor's guilt. Of course he harbored feelings of self-hatred that led him to make decisions he wouldn't normally make.
"I notice something. My hands are clean." Wow. This statement. So perfect, so evocative, illustrates his pain and how he's been living (or not living) so well. I felt this in my stomach.
"Alice is shaking me. Or maybe I'm shaking and she's still." You very-well did it again. My stomach. This boy was so lost. He didn't know if he was coming or going and he was doing neither. So heartbreaking.
"The first day in a month is always the hardest. The first day of a new year will kill me..." - Powerful, honest, so well-put yet so simple.
That little bit of scene when the three of them are in the car gave so much insight into their relationship and state of being without one "telling" word. (Much more insight than other stories take scenes to show.)
And the ending. Edward finally figured out what was right, how he'd messed up, and now his hands can be clean all the time, and he doesn't have to worry so much about who's shaking. I don't think his strong black vine is strangling him anymore. I think he now has the power over it. He's learned to co-exist with it.
Please don't let those who don't understand keep you from writing. You have talent. You really do. You wowed me with this piece many times over. A beautiful story of grief and clawing your way out of it.
| Pyejammies chapter 1 . 10/14/2013
That was so touching and shows that grief can lead us to do irrational things.
| Ellie chapter 1 . 10/10/2013
This was very good. :)
| sparklymeg chapter 1 . 9/27/2013
Aww Mags I just loved this in the contest. I really want you to continue it ;)
| twiclare chapter 1 . 9/21/2013
That was really difficult to read, of course I assumed Bella was dead for most of it and then felt so incredibly let down by Edward! The idea of him leaving her in the hospital with her belongings is just heartbreaking but somehow you still managed to I've us a glimmer of hope at the end!
| twilight1972 chapter 1 . 9/15/2013
Oh dear! You can't stop there!
| wonderfullybedazzled chapter 1 . 9/1/2013
Very well done!
| CarrieZM chapter 1 . 8/31/2013
Oh Mag ...I fell in love with this one shot the first time I read it. Such a beautiful - heartbreaking story ...and the way you tell it makes my chest ache. I love the flashbacks and the twists and turns you give us. But most especially I love the ending ... the glimmer of hope and a happy future . It makes my imagination run wild.
Thanks for sharing such a touching story 3. Sorry it took me so long to get this review to you - I seriously have a list of things I got behind on ..and slow but sure I'm getting there.
| Rita01tx chapter 1 . 8/28/2013
You should be very proud of yourself! This was a beautiful first attempt at angst! So glad that, in the end, Bella wasn't dead and they got to be together again!
| SparrowNotes24 chapter 1 . 8/28/2013
You should be proud Magpie as it's amazing. It was one of my favourites. The more it hurts the better and you really tugged on my heart with this. Your imagery was both beautiful and harrowing at the same time especially at the beginning when E was at rock bottom. My fav bit was your comparison of ripping out the carpets to him wanting to rip off and get out of his own skin and the connection with the vines. Gradually you showed us a little light and with the clever twist gave us the chance for a happy ending. They will still need to work through a lot but I appreciated the glimmer. Beautiful words are beautiful.
| Kickinl8tr chapter 1 . 8/24/2013
You wrote great in angst. Loved it it had me panicky just like I like it.
| ulyses birdwing chapter 1 . 8/24/2013
The tight, clear phrases, the sharp pictures you give us, make this one shot a real pearl
Love your writing! UB xx
| ana1973 chapter 1 . 8/24/2013
Well that was great since it was first attempt at angst. At the beginning i really thought it was bella who died but that was a twist that it was his mom and he was driving and he hurt the two women he loved the most, really sad.
| Debbi84 chapter 1 . 8/24/2013
You had me in tears.