|Reviews for Pokemon: The Adventures in the US League|
| LEGAL-EAGLE53 chapter 97 . 8/19
So Kayla is a Fairy type gym leader. Awesome! Katie won her eleventh gym badge! That's great that Brady's Swinub evolved into Piloswine. So Kayla's badge is called the Pixie Badge. Man, Hector is cocky and annoying. Just like Zac.
| LEGAL-EAGLE53 chapter 96 . 7/16
We see Cole again! I almost forgot Katie had a Mawile.
| ajkent14z chapter 95 . 4/28
Reviewing after a long time..
First of all, I must say this is getting more and more interesting with each chapter.. I'm curious to find out what's coming ahead..
Also, will Aaron Blackheart still be the sixteenth gym leader or have you planned anything else?
| LEGAL-EAGLE53 chapter 95 . 4/24
That was a touching chapter. I am fine with... wait, I can't remember if you decided to make my OC leader number 12 or number 15.
| LEGAL-EAGLE53 chapter 94 . 2/13
| Guest chapter 1 . 1/6
Name: Xevikan Daraxerxes (zev-i-can dar-a-zer-sees)
Height and Weight:5' 11" 150lb
Eye Color:a liquid silver.
Hair Color: Onyx Black covering his left eye down to his cheek.
Skin Tone/ Color:a medium tan like an islander.
Daily/Battle Clothing: a black shirt with a black gray button up with the sleeves rolled up, a pair of blue jeans with a brown leather belt, and a pair of black mid-calf boots with the pants tucked in.
PJs: a simple pair of black pj pants and shirt.
Formal Attire: a black armani suit with a white under shirt and black formal pants with a pair of black ferragamos(shoes)
City, and State:UT, Mapleton
Bio about character: became trainer to prove that he is dangerous, calm and composed doesn't get angry easily (except for team rocket) would accept being defeated but would come back for revenge later, if he won he would gloat silently with a smirk and walk a way without saying anything else. very antisocial but very competitive, relentless in battle, has only three pokemon.
Battling Strategy:ruthless precision.
Personality: calm and collected(except for team rocket.)
Pokemon:only two pokemon, starter was a glaceon, only known move is one they worked on themselves. name: absolute zero. nickname:snowflake next pokemon is a flareon, three moves, explosion, blast burn, v-create. nickname:solarflare. the glacoen is female and is always outside the pokeball.
Rival:please choose an oc for me.
End Goal: to be the champion
| LEGAL-EAGLE53 chapter 92 . 12/12/2015
Wait, how did Katie's Sliggoo evolve into Goodra without rain? Remind me again who Cedric is. That's great that Katie and Emma won their tenth gym badges. That was an interesting experience for Daniel.
| LEGAL-EAGLE53 chapter 91 . 10/15/2015
At any point earlier on, did you reveal that Morgan is a guy? I mean in the story.
| LEGAL-EAGLE53 chapter 90 . 10/12/2015
That was nice that Zac's Shellos evolved. Too bad that kid just can't accept a loss. I know I sent you Mackenzie a while ago, but the gang is only going after badge 10, now. Either she could hand his ass to him or you could use Jamie. Speaking of Jamie, have you decided on using him or not?
| LEGAL-EAGLE53 chapter 89 . 10/7/2015
I liked the battle between Andrew and Marc. I also liked the meetings of the families.
| NuttyBuddy792 chapter 89 . 10/6/2015
Alright, new chapter, Halloween is around the corner! Cute start to the morning, though I do question the whole white tie shirt shirt deal. While it's nice he's "matching" Katie, it just seems...odd for a white tie on a white dress shirt. Then again, having seen how people like Messi dress, I can't really complain. Carry on!
So Marc is battling the Champ. This oughta be interesting. Time to see what type he specializes in, if any. You really should check for grammatical errors in your work. Both the wording of Andrew's pickmeup speech and punctuation was off. "would you be the head OF my Elite Four?" I know it's a 2 letter word, but it makes all the difference. I harp on simple mistakes like that because I care, and they're easily correctable with proper proof reading.
Ahh, logistics. It's a nice touch to see what's going on behind the scenes at these events, but I doubt it's what the readers came here for. Nice to see Jen get a little spotlight shone on her work. No cutscene to see what Katie was up to in the Smithsonian? Eh, carry on.
Radio interviews. Gotta love them. And little kid fans. Oh, what's this? Marc specializes in 2 types?! Well well well, that certainly makes this Elite Four more complicated. Makes me wonder what types the other 3 specialize in.
Time for the party. Parents wanting pictures, it almost has a prom-like feel to it. I wouldn't know, since I never went to prom (didnt feel like wasting money on a penguin suit and couldn't find a date), but that's besides the point.
Alright, nice to keep the costumes nearby, though Indian Head is only 20 minutes from DC (and probably 10 minutes on dragon back), eh, saves them from being messed up on the flight I guess.
A couple of questions about the security. While I understand it's a formal occasion, couldn't we be allowed at least one Pokémon? What if Team Darkness had launched an all-out attack? Worse yet, what if they'd snuck into Andrew's room and stolen Katie's Pokémon? Just because a hotel room is locked doesn't mean it's secure.
I'm mildly disappointed Caitlynn sorta got shoved to the side. Her dress wasn't even mentioned, even as it matched her fiery personality, not to mention I wouldn't have nearly as much a problem waiting in line like she would. If anything, she'd be aggrivated about waiting, not a patient fellow like me. Onwards to dinner!
Huh. I expected more dinner talk. I would think a couple of champions, past and present, multiple talented trainers in Dan, Mika, and Cat, and their families would be a nice interlude leading up to the battle. It's nice to recognize the old champ, I would've expected a discussion about her past battles or something. Eh. It'd be filler, but it'd be a bit more character development for Sydney. Oh well, that's life. On with the battle!
Hmm, I'm surprised Hitmonchan didn't have Ice Punch, what with the elemental punches sorta being its forte. That, and Andrew being defensive is quite the switch up from his usual dominating self. Nothing wrong with that, actually, it seems to be the counter to Marc, taking down a very speedy dragon and more agile than you think mushroom.
Well, Dragonite prevented this from being a skunking, though I have to ask, what did you mean when Flygon "slew" down? Did you mean slowed down? Flew?
Hmm. I haven't seen Conkeldurr fights in the anime, so I dunno if they carry their pillars with them all the time or not, it's an unusual Pokémon. Still, I'd have thought an Elite Four wouldve been able to get out of a simple Giga Drain somehow, though closer examination of that species reveals a sorely lacking variety of long range moves, limited to Focus Blast & Stone Edge, neither of which would've done well here. Carry on!
Andrea's lucky Marc can't call on the ultimate fluffiness of Mega Altaria, otherwise I dare say that battle might've gone a little differently. And by the way, getting back on spelling & grammar, just like you have several mistakes where you don't have the right word to make the sentence flow, you can add too many words that disrupt a sentence, particularly this sentence: he really wanted to do better than take out only one 'on' of Andrew's Pokémon.
A pity for Marc, as he can't stand up to a Mega Evolved Pokémon, but thems the breaks when you're just an Elite Four compared to the Champ. I did expect better from him, truth be told, hopefully he'll get a chance to show how strong he is by battling someone other than the champion one day.
And costume time. Gotta admit, Mario and Peach is a very symbolic part of their relationship so far, though methinks Katie will move past the damsel in distress part soon enough. Nice touch there. Then there's the Prince of all Saiyans, his best girl, and two *shudder* zombies. Ugh, I hate zombies. Still, her costume, who am I to judge.
Caitlynn speaks! Then it's planning for the Mega Steelix, which is looking large now. And a precursor to the Hypermode talks we'll see next chapter. Neat. Winding down of the party, I'm mildly disappointed you didn't throw in some quotes from Team Four Star, but oh well.
Huh. The mighty protege of Andrew (and his girlfriend) is scared of storms. The more you know, i guess. Rain delay, the gathering of maps, and finally they've arrived in Kansas City. I guess this means the next chapter will be up soon, right? ;)
A decent chapter, watch out for grammatical errors, perhaps put a little more details in certain parts like the costume party and a little less in the logistics portion, otherwise, keep up the good work!
From your Nutty Buddy,
The Eagle Nut
| LEGAL-EAGLE53 chapter 88 . 9/24/2015
If there's gonna be a big battle between Team Darkness and the gym leaders, that wouldn't be a bad idea.
| Smashgunner chapter 19 . 9/16/2015
Wait Brady is a girl? (Don't reply its rhetorical)
| NuttyBuddy792 chapter 87 . 9/15/2015
Might as well review given I have some questions brought up thanks to this chapter. For starters, how is Andrew speaking to Marc? Videochat? Phone? Details matey!
It is a logical assumption to believe that Kyogre is resting in the cavern, guarded by the local wildlife, being the only Water type legendary that actually lives in the water. Suicune and Keldeo live on land and Palkia makes his own dimensions.
What's this, a demonstration battle on Halloween? Should be interesting. I can't help but wonder if my character has a role to play for Halloween or if he'll just chill at home, enjoying the annual bonfire my family does.
Fluff between Katie and Andrew, politics rears it's ugly head, can't help but wonder what's up with the German league, especially considering my friend Anja is a member of their Elite Four (see Rivals Collide, chapter 3). More fluff, intercontinental plans, time for training! What booth does Michael run again? I forget...
Zac & Katie butt heads again, this time it leads into a battle. Magneton vs Heracross is a nice start, type match ups giving Katie the early lead. Then Skarmory comes in, wrecks Absol for a bit before Absol returns the favor with Hypermode. Not surprising he went berserk, I'll elaborate more in my chapter, here we see the ultimate dark type attack, a name I can't think of for the moment. Luckily, Andrew was there to save the day, even at the risk of getting injured again.
While I don't blame Zac entirely for being upset over what happened (I'd be upset if my Pokémon got attacked after they'd been KOed, like what happened in battle 1 with Marco), there's no reason to tell another Trainer to release their Pokémon. Meh, he's a jerk, something I'll do my best to capture. Lousy antihero, if that's what you're going for with him, but overall just a jerk.
Ahh, so the battle of Richmond is still being talked about? Interesting. Sounds like it helped Team Darkness discover my identity and then my home, but that's in the past.
Katie & Ally with the girl talk, Andrew forming a great relationship with a potential father-in-law, now Emma gets the abandoned Krokorok. That's 2 powerful Pokémon she's gotten indirectly from other Trainers. Lucky her. Glad the sand gator got a nice home though.
Movie fluff, hold up. You're going swimming, in Boston, in October? Really? Do you have any idea how cold it gets in New England in the fall? I'd expect Andrew, as a native Californian, to be pretty cold, all things considered. I'd guess the highest the temp would get at Boston around Halloween would be 70 degrees F, and that's with a warm front moving through. Try to maintain consistency. You're approaching winter now, make notes of the colder climates, especially in more northern areas, like Boston. Instead of summer activities like going to the pool, try a hay ride or local bonfire, something fall related. That, and Marco Polo is captialized. That paragraph would've been good had it still been August or even early September, but it's October, in the New England area. Alright, rant over for that segment, Zac's really naive if he didn't notice the relationship between the champ and his protégée, if you will.
Good pizza and controversy about the final Gym. Huh. Weird. It isn't a hard job, but at the same time is isn't exactly easy, as you're guiding young trainers in the right direction, coming up with various tests to bring out their best. Another plot line for later chapters.
End of the day, Andrew gets the dad's blessing to woo his daughter, things are moving along swiftly, unlike Dan & Cat's relationship. Lol, all in due time, a decent chapter overall. Though I have to ask, when does Zac's Monferno evolve? I would've thought it'd be against Adrian, simply cuz the other 3 had their starter evolve, but it seems I'm mistaken.
So it seems Brady is going to end up with an Altaria. That ball of fluff swept my team online in it's mega form, much to my dismay. Makes me wonder how he'll deal with the mega fluffy.
Team darkness attacks in KC. Should I include that in my chapter or let it end peacefully discussing Hypermode over lunch? More questions to come as they arise, I'm sure. Until then,
From your Nutty Buddy,
The Eagle Nut
| LEGAL-EAGLE53 chapter 87 . 9/15/2015
Uh, for Marc, what type does he specialize in? I can't remember. I remember a while back that you said that Seth is based off of Paul. Is Zac supposed to be based off of Gary? Brady is going to catch an Altaria, then. Team Darkness: I have a plan in mind only if you're willing. I also sent you Jamie's other information in that PM.