|Reviews for Soldier Down|
| OxEyed chapter 1 . 9/2/2013
Having scrapped more AUs than I can remember because they were growing faster than I could write them, I can appreciate the effort you put into this.
Also: I always disregard your warnings and I always end up regretting it. I WAS NOT PREPARED.
Back to worldbuilding-this was well done in terms of tone and atmosphere: I was immediately reminded of my favorite military narratives, especially Ender's Game, though maybe that's due to your early mention of child soldiers. I really like what you did with this universe's characters and their fates, or I did until the twist, haha. But yes: memorable story, great job, good luck.
| reminiscent-afterthought chapter 1 . 8/29/2013
An interesting assortment of people on both sides. It's certainly fascinating to see Kaiba, Ryou and Malik so close; I don't believe I've seen that before (but then again, I haven't read too many yugioh fics). As far as a war epic goes, I like the tinges of realism that sneak in, how war's not just about the blood and things that happen on the battlefield but what happens off it as well. And how it's not as black and white as it appears. The switch really couldn't have happened at a better time, with everyone writing it off because of Cyndia's death. The way you interpreted the pairing at the end boredered on creepy as well. :)
[ Second Lieutenant Malik Ishtar drawled overlooking the 3D battlefield module] - I think a comma is in order there, after "drawled".
[Kaiba Seto, as one of the far too many war orphans, hadn't been expected to make it far, but the twist of fate which had brought him into the Kaiba family] - I would omit the first "Kaiba" there, since the idea is that he wasn't born as one and was rather adopted into the family.
You suddenly switch from Ryou to Bakura about halfway through. Was there a reason for that or just a slip of the tongue?
Anyway, a very interesting read. And you've put an awful lot of careful thought and planning into your world-building as well, and it really shows. Well done, and good luck in the contest.