|Reviews for To Call A Place Home|
| sabb chapter 18 . 1/12
Oh no no nooo, it was just getting more interesting! AHHHH I need more, I want more.. thank god its still being updated. Hope you update in January at least :D
| G Fawkes chapter 17 . 1/11
I can't read this anymore. You keep having Harry say things like 'I set Hogwart's on fire to save Dean' (para). Harry set some TREES on fire, to kill some death eaters. BFD. Even Dumblydork didn't care. He said Hagrid would see to it. Too much angst.
Also wtf with the Ginny/Harry shit? She aint' HIS Ginny. HIS Ginny ain't even HIS Ginny. She an EX. HE broke up with HER .
Oh, and Ron is a moron, not worth bringing through a porthole to do anything but eat the leftovers.
| GF chapter 16 . 1/11
Forty three Order member deaths.
In Harry World, there aren't forty three members! Twenty three would be reaching. Are they handing out Phoenix badges at Fortescue's with every double scoop, or are you 'considered' a member as long as you don't have a Dark Mark?
| mdauben chapter 18 . 1/12
The "watching the memories" trope, like the similar "reading the books" trope, can be kind of boring. I think you've kept it interesting, though, with the conversations and reactions of everyone. I'll be looking forward to your next update.
| Spidersauce chapter 16 . 1/12
Yes you trusted your Ddore completely Harry, that is not remotely the same as saying your Ddore deserved that trust. He manipulated you and sent people to their deaths all the same. You're just not taking things at face value this time, so you see it.
I'm surprised Harry hasn't realized only people dead in this world can come over from his other one.
| Spidersauce chapter 14 . 1/12
Good. Harry should feel weak. He's pathetic in this story whenever he interacts with a "good guy." He turns into instant little bitch mode. This whole heart to heart with James is just wrong too. Harry isn't an emotional "let's talk about my feelings" kind of person. But that's the majority of what you're having him do.
Harry should accuse Alastor of being a death eater. Really, going on about how Harry has no reason to trust THIS Hermione. He has no reason to trust THIS Mad-Eye either. He's really liking playing with double standards and Harry just lets him.
| Spidersauce chapter 13 . 1/12
Harry already knew this bullshit that Hermione's going on about. Talked about it what 10 chapters ago? Why are we rehashing?
And then the horcrux killing scene is massively out of character. Harry knows exactly what it'll try to do, so Harry will raise his sword, start swinging at it, and tell it to open midswing. It'll open and be destroyed in the same second. This whole talking to the horcrux scene is so contrived it's silly.
And then he has this pathetic moment with James, then passes out like a little bitch. Again.
My god you go so far to ruin what is otherwise quite the good story you're writing.
| Spidersauce chapter 12 . 1/12
. . . Harry is apparently incapable of telling people no. REALLY want him to tell James to fuck off.
| Spidersauce chapter 11 . 1/12
. . . Harry left Draco with his wand? Didn't even stun him? Again, you wanted something specific to happen so you had Harry take Allllll the retard pills.
| Spidersauce chapter 9 . 1/12
So Harry is a badass, meets up with Lily and instantly goes into little kid mode not knowing what to do, standing there stuttering around like an idiot. There are no words for how pathetic that is. Also, he entirely forgets he's capable of apparating around like literally everyone else is doing, because that gives him a convenient excuse for Harry to be a bitch and allows Lily to rescue him. Right. Then he again forgets he can disapparate and stands to be cursed and tries to shield because he conveniently has Bella-Laughing trauma, nevermind that he never froze like that to her in canon. Then the ever-convenient black out at the end so you can timeskip.
I like your writing . . . but you make Harry become an idiot or OOC so you can do something specific in a fight scene, rather than have whatever it is occur naturally. Very jarring to read.
Also Harry is an idiot. Jonathon has not shown to be good at magic whatsoever, so Harry's correct response here is to pick up his wand and stun Jon. Not let him plan and be an idiot etc.
| Spidersauce chapter 4 . 1/12
Hate that he's calling Dumbles Professor. The man deserves no respect, he's a monster. Disgracing the title.
| Spidersauce chapter 3 . 1/12
It is not unacceptable at all. Dumbledore just added a side of rape to the meeting and everyone acts like HARRY is out of line for getting angry? The fuck?
Really hope this doesn't turn into a pushover Harry.
| sundaydo7 chapter 18 . 1/12
Have to say you are getting better with each chapter , keep writing please and a little less sappy
| Spidersauce chapter 1 . 1/12
Two hated fanfic tropes in one chapter, damn. First dropping his wand like a complete rookie, then blacking out like a bitch. ;o
Writing is seeming good other than that.
| a9m9p9l9 chapter 18 . 1/10
It is very interesting, when is it updated? I can't wait to keep reading