|Reviews for The White Rose of Vermilion|
| Urtoryu chapter 27 . 3/2/2021
"Typical Schnee. You are too kind." Say this to Jacques... (Okay, he wasn't born a Scheme, but you got the idea.)
I really liked this scene with Lutolf and Dhago, not only because of their interaction, but because of how different their culture and religion is. It is extremely rare to have this type of comradery between territories of different believes.
| Urtoryu chapter 26 . 3/2/2021
Curious, Blake is a faunus in here but Velvet isn't? Well, it would be way harder to hide bunny ears, so it makes sense.
| Urtoryu chapter 25 . 3/1/2021
Oh yes, the mighty and proud sentinels, the same ones that were knocked out by a little girl even when they had the help of multiple guardsman and sentries and she had low quality equipment. If she didn't have such a bad reputation I'm sure they would bring that up, such a shame...
| Urtoryu chapter 24 . 3/1/2021
I know I'm years in the future, so what you said on this chapter is not recent, but life is always hard, so I'm saying this to whatever conflict you might be having now.
First of all, I want to let you know that no matter how hard things are, there is always a change they'll get better. Even if they don't, in the middle of all the bad things, there are little good ones, focus on them. Life has many problems, but life also has countless good moments we tend to miss. It's in human nature to focus on the negatives, but the good is always there, you'll find it if you look for it.
Just look at what you wrote yourself. Ruby's and Yang's story might've been fruits of your imagination, but real life can be surprisingly similar to fiction.
Also, as someone who had suicidal thoughts before, don't waste your time thinking about it. In the end, dying is never a good option, people kill themselves thinking that even being a bad option, it is better then their other ones. But if you think about it, we are incapable of seeing all the options, so how would you know if there's not a better one? The future always has a chance of being better then the present, always.
About writing, don't feel like your obligated to write. If you don't want to, you don't need to push yourself. You don't write for other people, you write for yourself, and others just happen to like what you did. You shouldn't decide if you'll write by the amount of feedback you get, you should decide it by your own will. And if you feel the need to have people reviewing and liking your story, remember this: the important part is not the number of reviews you get, but what's written in each one of them. You know if your story is loved not because of how many people read it, but because of how much the ones who do love it. But if you do want to write, just know that it'll inevitable make others happy, there will be someone who'll love to see a new chapter.
| Urtoryu chapter 23 . 3/1/2021
Eleventh? 6th? Wasn't Ludolf the sixth warden and Ruby's company the 9th? Was it an error or did I miss something?
Also, I called it. Weiss talking to Ruby's superior could be very bad.
| Urtoryu chapter 22 . 2/28/2021
I quite like Leo and Simon, and I came to respect Cassius after his talk with Ruby, because of how honest he was and because he was respectful even when he clearly disliked her. So even though I really don't like Brutus, the sentinels are not so bad.
Also, I really hope Weiss doesn't end up making things worst than they already are, talking with Ruby's superior could be very good, or very bad for her.
| Urtoryu chapter 20 . 2/28/2021
And now that Ruby is in the military there's a war coming...
If this was written after volume 3 I'd be sure the hooded guy is Adam. Extremely good with a sword, the miner immediately recognized something in his face, which could have been the horns, has legions of faunus under his control, manipulative, everything seems to point at Adam. But this started before volume 3, so either you were ahead of time and put Adam in the story only knowing what Blake said about him and what was in the trailer. Or it's just another person, probably an OC. There's also the possibility you made him anonymous to buy time for you to only decide who it is after having more source material, but I doubt that. So I betting on either an OC or Adam.
| Urtoryu chapter 18 . 2/28/2021
Relax Ruby, I can assure you the god of your world approves Bumblebee, so it's not a sin. But they also approve White Rose, so you might consider not being that religious, cause it's pretty mean of their part.
| Urtoryu chapter 17 . 2/28/2021
Crecent Rose was normally in the form of a common scythe, but there were many scenes it transformed into a war scythe (like when Ruby cut that tree on volume 1) so I guess you could consider it one.
I was more surprised Ruby had to think that much to choose than what she chose. I would probably go for the bag right away. The moment he said he'd only tell what happened to Yang if she joined it was not a choice anymore. Having to abandon friends was already bad, but living the rest of your life without even knowing if she's alive is even worst than knowing she's dead. Besides, one option was permanet while the other was for 10 years, in the long term having a limit is better anyways. And that's without even saying that working for him would give her a good income, which there's no way to know she'd have if she was to start living in another city with only the 10000 lien. It's a lot, but losing money is not hard at all, her life could be worse than it was after leaving the orphanage. There are downsides, of course, but I think they are not nearly as bad as the ones for the other option.
| Urtoryu chapter 16 . 2/28/2021
Non lethal wounds huh... I think she had too much adrenaline to control the attacks so well in life threatening combat. When she said she purposely dealt non lethal hits I immediately doubted it remembering that she hit the first guy in the chest, I'm actually a little surprised he didn't die.
Now that I think about it, Cassius said it was thanks to God, and he probably survived for plot convince to avoid Ruby being a murderer, so in a way it really was the will of God (the author).
| Urtoryu chapter 15 . 2/28/2021
The most interesting thing on this chapter was without a doubt the warden freaking out near the end, that's something I really want to see more about, and it's probably going to be important for Weiss' character development as well.
I bet it's related to what he said to Yang during the trial. It might also have something to do with that door Pyrrha was looking at in the mansion, it's probably not connected because the mansion is way older than him, but it would be possible for the door to be recent.
| Urtoryu chapter 14 . 2/28/2021
It's funny how I first though Yang had killed Trush and was sad for Ruby, then started to believe Yang actually didn't kill the guy and the author was baiting me, then denied it and thought that she probably did kill him, only to have her win me at the trial and reach the conclusion she was innocent. Thinking about it, the judges must have had a really hard time with this one...
Now the real question is of course who the hooded man is, as the miner recognized his face, it must be someone important. I know it's not, but I wish it was Roman, that would be funny.
| Smilingatyou chapter 23 . 2/26/2021
For ch 23, I love the contrast between Ruby and the others. I think your characterization of her thought process is very interesting. Even on a day to celebrate, she still follows the discipline she was taught. Which is super understandable, i mean she doesn't even like Weiss Schnee. I thought it was really interesting to see the difference in the character's emotions. How Weiss was so happy, and Ruby was scared. I loved was that Ruby felt fear as Weiss was being appointed heir. That is such dynamic characterization. I also loved how you ended the chapter.
But like another thing, Weiss has already shown her regret and understanding of that day, so why is ruby still afraid. I also literally have no idea you're going to turn this into WhiteRose.
I think this is the forst review I've ever written, but this story is soooooo worth it. You've done a pretty damn good job!
| Urtoryu chapter 10 . 2/25/2021
It was a little funny that I innocently joked about killing the guy in my last review, and said it wouldn't work, and some chapters latter Yang kills the guy, and gets caught. It was a mix of feelings between: "I said it wasn't gonna work." and "sorry, I said it as a joke, I didn't mean it!"
Ruby's part was very hard to read, especially the rock trowing scene, but that made me wonder how are you going to make White Rose work, cause out of all the "bad first impressions", this was one of the worst.
I'm liking the story so far, (it's hard to read, but I've seen Made in Abyss, and compared to that this is still kinda light.) and I hope I continue to, the fic is pretty big, and there are a lot of favorites, so I'm pretty sure it's going to be good, that if it doesn't get even better later on.
| Urtoryu chapter 3 . 2/25/2021
You know, in medieval times the security was way worst than it is today. No cameras, no police, no one to find this drunk's body... and even if someone fond it we could just talk with the head of the military who's a good friend, push some strings here and there...
Unfortunately that wouldn't work, but we can dream.