|Reviews for Hail Mary|
| Guest chapter 16 . 9/21/2014
I don't leave reviews often at all but feel it's my obligation to tell you how completely wonderful this story is. I originally was just looking at a story that would expand on the MLP universe, so it was a complete surprise that I would adore a pairing, humanized story so much. I absolutely loved Applejack and Rainbow. Their pacing was great, their romance was real, and as someone who doesn't normally ship any pairing in this series, I kept finding myself rooting for them and loving their interactions.
And the overall character arcs and plot was so meaningful and in no way cliche. I cannot get over how much I enjoyed this and how thankful I am for stumbling upon this. Thanks a ton for the great piece of writing.
| FoxOwne chapter 1 . 9/10/2014
So, I'm liking this so far. I'm on the Shining Armor and Big Mac chapter, so I got a while left. Now, I really like Spike in this. I connect with him, I feel for him, and I really want good things to come to him. All the other characters, while so far not fleshed out enough, are still good. I have only two negative things to say:
Rainbow Dash and Scootaloo. I, so far, am hating them both. A lot. And that isn't a good thing, considering that my favorite of all the characters in the show is Rainbow, and Scootaloo has always been pretty cool.
I don't know if it's just me, but Rainbow is absolutely annoying. She's jeopardized the team, almost injured Spike out of nowhere, will not leave Apple Jack alone once, not even in front of her family or hundreds of people at a football game, and in the end she acts like she's not at fault. I would be fine if she did her perv thing every once in a while, but not ninety percent of the time she's around. I am totally fine with her being prideful, but she isn't stupid; she wouldn't do that kind of thing to anyone, let alone Spike, one of her own friends. She's also not lazy enough to let it control her competitive side. She was definitely lazy in the show, but when it came to anything athletic, it became a null trait; sports and activities are her number one priority. She wouldn't let her team become so uncoordinated, nor would she herself. And to top it off, the only one to really challenge Rainbow Dash and call out how shitty of a person she is was Big Mac. Applejack does nothing to keep her "friend" in line; she practically allows her to harass and mistreat her. I don't care about the AppleDash pairing (if that is genuinely what you're going for), Applejack should keep a fifty foot gap between herself and Rainbow; she's just not a good person in any way. I'm sorry to say this, as the rest of the story is indeed good, but this version of Rainbow Dash is pretty much the same as Dante in the new DmC; a butchering of an awesome character.
And what the fuck is up with Scootaloo? Where in the show did you get the notion she would be a smoking, rude, disrespectful slut? This is a My Immortal quality character adaptation; she is nothing like how she should be, and like Rainbow, I just cannot possibly connect with her, nor can I stand to read any more of her dialogue.
I don't know if these characters change for the better later, as I am only on the Shining Armor and Big Mac chapter, but right now it isn't exactly making me want to read more about them. They're unrealistic, nothing like they were, and overall, poorly written characters.
That being said, I will continue reading. I'll post a final review when I finish, but for now, this is just how I'm feeling. I don't mean to be a total dick, even though I probably was, but I just can't stand them. I really hope you do well later with writing, but this isn't a very good preview of what you are capable of, I'm sorry.
| Nightmare Moon and FireFlight chapter 10 . 7/29/2014
...this took me a whole hour to read...
| Nightmare Moon and FireFlight chapter 4 . 7/26/2014
For a second I thought the title was Apple Bloom's murder...UGH THAT IS WHAT I GET FOR READING A HORROR FIC BEFORE THIS!
| Micah7 chapter 10 . 4/10/2014
It happened. Well, now that its out the way...Im not quite sure what to say.
| Micah7 chapter 9 . 4/10/2014
*growls* Yeeeeaaaahhhh Spike, git summmmmm. I'm glad Rarity stopped you though, she's still a classy lady. But dam, he got to grope dat ass. How hot is that? o/u/o like woah, she placed his hands on her ass. Thats just fucking sublime.
Their little date was very cute. Spike's tryna come up in the world. Thatta boy, Spike. Thatta boy. Just got bust Felix a new asshole and you'll be set in stone.
| Micah7 chapter 8 . 4/9/2014
I really, really, really liked this chapter. The victory, the teamwork, Spike's increase in athletic ability, his increase in confidence and not to mention his increase of phone numbers. The quintessential cherry on top had to be that kiss Spike and Rarity shared. Fuck yeah, Spike. *thumbs up* I just feel really good reading it. Something strikes me as adorable that Spike has re-established a good relationship with Rarity's little sister, Sweetie Belle. I just feel very fuzzy and pleasant after this chapter. Go Spike! )
| Micah7 chapter 7 . 4/9/2014
Haha wow..lil' Spike and Rarity. They're so different, yet they'd make an adorable couple. Spike's crying on Rarity's shoulder. He's braver than me, I hate crying. Unless I'm in intense pain.
But its good he expressed himself, thats great. Even if it was a little. Felix just needs his ass whoopin' and all will be right with the world. Getting her number though, I fully approve. Oooh Gitcha summmm! lolol
| Micah7 chapter 5 . 4/8/2014
I'm torn between wanting to embrace Spike, coo at him that it'll get better, and he's doing a great job, and yelling at him, telling him to man up and stop being so god dam /emo/. Also, not sure if you're using Rainbow Dash's flirts for comedic relief, but it's definitely working I've been grinning the whole time, but chortling here and there.
Your descriptive tone of the gameplay was great, you must be an actual football fan, no?
I could see everything happening and thats rare for sports based lit bc I'm not into football at all. However, this is like a breath of fresh air.
Rarity was at the game cheering on Spike? Wow! Guys can be so clueless sometimes, but thats a great sign, Spike has no idea. And cheering loudly, like she's not ashamed to be associated with him. So much feels in here. I love it. u
| Micah7 chapter 4 . 4/8/2014
Ok, forgive me. The last review was meant for this chapter actually, sorry about that. Now, that I've finished this chapter I must say its really really funny. I laughed out loud literally at Get the hell in before you get AJ's headlights rammed up your ass!"
Rainbow...she's funny but she's currently my least favorite character. She just...jumps the gun too fast, too often. But Spike gotta toughen up. I'm personally rooting for him. Him and Rarity lol
| Micah7 chapter 3 . 4/8/2014
Rainbow Dash, nitpicking at Spike. Like he doesn't have enough on his plate. Then, having the nerve to even wanting to cry at Applebloom's criticism. Nothing a good ass whoopin' wouldn't fix.
| Micah7 chapter 1 . 4/8/2014
Awww, the description of Spike in here. I just imagined his voice, plus this image of him being portrayed and I wanted to hug him. For the first time since watching the series, I want to literally hug Spike. Also, his message to Twilight. Toughen up? Not to be patronizing to Spike but that was god awful adorable and him checking her for her approval? Awww. But he's trying to reinvent himself and I respect that. Rock on, Spike.
Speaking of that, I have so much more respect for him from the get go finally knowing that he tried to fight those guys. Didnt give no lip either, no whimperin'. No. He tried his best. Such heart, Spike. Can't wait til this Felix character gets his. I'm hoping in am uppercut or broken jaw. Also, I like how you played upon Spike's crush on Rarity. Thats great, just awesome. Is she slightly older, too?
I digress. I love how this has started so far. Perhaps you will describe them physically more in the upcoming chapters?
| The Hammer77 chapter 16 . 1/14/2014
This story is really good. You should make a sequel about spike going to ponyville high.
| kegusaran 14 chapter 1 . 1/3/2014
... huh, Spike kinda seems creepy
| Dragon'z Wrath chapter 16 . 1/2/2014
OK so I'm new to this story but holy shi is I amazing. Lol you deserve way more reviews and follows/favs. Keep up the good work.