|Reviews for Hit-Girl-Friend?|
| killer4853 chapter 5 . 11/12/2015
| Guest chapter 5 . 10/21/2015
I enjoyed your story.
| carathay chapter 5 . 8/17/2015
Excellent story. Very readable. Smooth. I've been avoiding reading other KA stuff because I hate the idea of copying someone else's idea but I'm glad I made the excepetion. Really fun adding in a wife for Marcus and great job of keeping the feeling between them growing slowly instead of just popping out of nowhere.
| hopelessromantic chapter 5 . 2/10/2015
i love this pair. how it started with friendship, with the girl mentoring the boy and progressed into something more. it reminded me of my otp.
| WintersWhiteMaiden chapter 5 . 7/17/2014
That was really cute!
| WhiteTigerLilly chapter 5 . 7/11/2014
So gay Dave again? I wonder how they'll explain that to Sarah. I also wonder how things will change since the the end is different. Will she get caught? What's next?
| Cebot133 chapter 5 . 7/10/2014
Great story. :)
| Talliann chapter 5 . 7/9/2014
First of all thanks for updating this story. I've read chapters 3,4 and 5 and I like them since they're well written but Makokam have some good points.
I mean, the whole shopping thing it's a bit too long and detailed and clearly shows that Mindy has more than a crush for Dave. It would have been nice to see some of the scenes from Mindy's view too. The whole gay Dave very funny.
My fave chapter so far is number 5 but seems like there's something missing from the previous ones. Feels like there's a gap or some facts missing. Chapter 5 could be an individual story for it's own just with a bit of introduction.
Anyway, good story, well written and loved chapter 5 and Dave and Mindy interaction. I can totally picture them acting like that.
| Makokam chapter 5 . 7/8/2014
Wait. That's the end? That...was a hell of a jump.
I was honestly confused when I started reading this chapter.
It honestly feels like you did a rush job to finish this, instead of adding two chapters of fluff, when you compare the last chapter to the first two chapters.
Why didn't you add... I dunno more fluff to any of the other scenes in the movie? Like the funeral scene? That one was ripe for the fluffing.
Anyway, I hope you continue this, because as of now it feels like it's just getting started.
| Makokam chapter 4 . 7/8/2014
"Partners on the street. Partners in the sheets."
"...so you and Damon..."
This was another good chapter but...again it feels overly contrived. I mean, everything with the fans and the air fresheners and tents... just seemed a little overkill. And that the only person was to get Dave closer to Mindy while she changed.
I'm also surprised Mindy insisted on his help with the dress shoping. It seems like something she'd be capable of doing all on her own. I get the impression she just wanted to see what HE thought of her in a dress. Could she be crushing on him already too?
And the discussion with Marcus was interesting. Not sure where he was going with it, since it seemed to change directions real fast.
Also, there's always someone willing to cut a deal. And I bet the women's shelter could provide some sort of corroberating testimony.
And of course there's the argument, "The charges may not stick, but they got what was coming to them and we got the girls out."
| Makokam chapter 3 . 7/7/2014
Okay, so, did you just put up a bunch of chapters or did I really just completely miss a bunch of updates?
Either way, this chapter was good. A bit weird, and not great, but it amused me.
A big thing I'm curious about is why they helped the girl. She was totally in on it. I was expecting Mindy to roll her over and jab her in the gut so shekd puke on herself. Seriously, why did she get a free pass?
Their little ploy didn't really make sense either. They were going in there to test the SICK Stick. Not to test Dave. They both could have just walked in there, been like, "Sup?" And gone -taptaptaptaptap- and weren't they supposed to be coming in from opposit ends of the alley? How'd Dave get so close? And wasn't he worried about chick seeing him? When did she pass out?
And when did they get the old man's name?
This whole chapter was weird.
Amusing but weird.
It's like the whole point of it was to get Dave perving on Mindy.
And then the end. What was so bad about "the weekender"? Like people don't spend weekends in Motels?
And if anyone goes that into detail about their situation, I know somethings up.
| shaqfu chapter 5 . 7/6/2014
Yes! This fic wasn't abandoned! I love the way you have Mindy flirting with Dave. Marcus putting two and two together and figuring out Dave's alter-ego was great. I also liked the end chapter. I do have a few questions though. I'm assuming that the bulk of the movie plot remained the same however, if Marcus convinced Dave to hang up his mask, would things have still gone down hill with his father? I'm assuming he would still have visited Miranda in the hospital when the cops came (he was banging her a week earlier, its only polite). As for Mindy, was she still grounded? The sic stick seems to fall within the parameters she agreed upon with Marcus as it causes no real damage, but is really unpleasant and humiliating.
| moosejuice5 chapter 2 . 6/27/2014
this is good, gay dave is funny
| Guest chapter 2 . 6/26/2014
| izzyp120 chapter 2 . 5/25/2014
That's was funny