|Reviews for The Forgotten Life|
| MellaTheKnightmare chapter 35 . 4/12
Ooh, good luck with fixing the Yosuke, Chie, and Yukiko thing. :o I didn't even notice it.
Also I love Midori's mom in this. I forgot how awesome she was.
And the reality marble thing was a little confusing in the chapter itself but thanks for explaining it at the end! :3
| MellaTheKnightmare chapter 34 . 2/12
This chapter was really fun to read And dramatic at the end with Yosuke and his shadow too. And it was nice to hear from Minimido again. xP Maybe you should consider having him appear more, if the mood is right and all.
(On a side note: Have you seen the Persona 5 gameplay trailer yet? I'm really excited for it now)
| MellaTheKnightmare chapter 33 . 12/14/2014
I love this chapter, the way you wrote Teddie was great. :} I agree with what you said about him being underrated. There's a lot more to him than just comic relief, and you made good use of everything. Like his loyalty to whole monologue(or whatever it's called xP) really hit me hard. ono
| MellaTheKnightmare chapter 32 . 11/11/2014
It's been a while, hehe. (I really need to re-read this whole fic sometime too, wow)
Anyway, the battles are pretty good to me I liked how you described Yosuke and Teddie when everyone found them, with all the injuries. It sounded really nice (well, not nice for them, but you know what I mean xP)
And also, when Shinjiro thought, 'You sacrificed yourself for us...and there are still people doing something stupid...', was he thinking of Minako? She's in this fic instead of Minato, right? (Like I said, I need to re-read a few previous chapters. XD)
But you're really improving on this fic. :3 It makes me happy not sure what else to say to fix. Except the last sentence..
"So...anyone have an excuse idea for our kidnapped colleagues?"
Maybe you need to take out "idea"?
| MellaTheKnightmare chapter 31 . 9/3/2014
I actually really liked the magic explanations in this. C: I could really see them existing in the Persona universe.
I do think repeatedly addressing Midori as The Fool was a little much though. You could use physical features too, I think.
| MellaTheKnightmare chapter 30 . 8/4/2014
Keiko in this chapter really got some nice focus. :) And the spar between her and young Midori was really easy to follow and all. A couple more descriptions about her and Midori, like their builds and hair and eye colors would've been good, but it's already great without those! :3
| MellaTheKnightmare chapter 29 . 7/27/2014
I liked the scene with Naoto and Rise best. :3 It's nice when you show some of the characters from the investigation team interacting with each other like that. And I'm looking forward to more after how this chapter ended. And having someone beta-read it really helped! I just noticed one typo in all this. XD
| MellaTheKnightmare chapter 28 . 7/13/2014
Haha, I really liked the way everyone interacted in this It was really fun and smooth to read. :) I was kinda unsure about the whole situation in the beginning with Midori and Adachi, but I got it later on. Might just be because it's kinda late over here for me. XP
| MellaTheKnightmare chapter 27 . 7/5/2014
I like the backstory you gave Adachi in this. :) And the dynamic between him and Midori is also entertaining. Same with Ken. I did have some trouble figuring out who was saying what during the scenes with them though. But I'm looking forward to more. :3
| MellaTheKnightmare chapter 26 . 6/27/2014
Aww, that was sweet between Yosuke and Chie. :') A nice interlude from the main story. I saw some grammar errors, but it's really not bad at all. I liked how you captured Yosuke in this, too.
| MellaTheKnightmare chapter 25 . 6/23/2014
Hey again. :) I'm really liking the romance between Midori and Naoto. It's really cute, and you write them both well. Same with Yosuke and Chie. It'd be nice to see a bit more of the P3 cast though. :3
| MellaTheKnightmare chapter 24 . 6/5/2014
The regular is back
And I like the title btw. Also, I like how you put Minako into the story, too. :3 I am kinda curious about her role though. Like, was she the leader instead of Minato?
(I like how you write all the P3 characters in this too)
I did notice a couple grammar errors, but nothing too bad. :3
| MellaTheKnightmare chapter 23 . 5/5/2014
Sorry for the late review. X.x
But anyway, this chapter was quite nice, because it showed the Conners actually being together and having fun as a family. I don't know about the other readers, but it sure brought a smile to my face. :3
I noticed some grammar issues, but it's really no big deal. It doesn't deter from the story at all. :)
| MellaTheKnightmare chapter 22 . 4/16/2014
I liked how you brought back a couple events from the original P4, like the camping trip, and the Junes shift thing. Nice nostalgia, plus Midori's personality really added a new perspective on them. :P
And unfortunately, I can't really say much about Mariko being in character, since I never played The Golden. OnO (Darn Vita) I like how you described her physically, though, because it was even easy for me to tell who she was. :3 But it was kind of a lot at once.
It'd maybe be better if you spaced all the description stuff out a bit through the whole scene. Like, an idea would be, describing her hat first, if Midori noticed that first. Then, describe everything else a bit later on, as Midori notices it.
But it was fun to read this chapter! :D
| MellaTheKnightmare chapter 21 . 3/31/2014
Oops, sorry for the late review. X.x I need to check my e-mail more often. Anyway, I really liked this chapter! The humor improved the battle scenes, and that music idea with Rise was cool, too. *_*
But during the scenes with Naoto and Midori, sometimes I got confused with who was talking. Maybe cos you describe them both as detectives at times? But it's not a horrible issue, you know. :3