Reviews for Fate Revelation Online
Lunatic-Over'9000'Lord chapter 5 . 4/18
Only 200?! What could this mean?!

Kayaba is talking to her directly?! That's a bit unexpected... I mean, in the anime, he only did that after Kirito beat him...


Wait, when Kayaba talked about his research subject being destroyed, was he talking about Ilya killing Shinji?

So THAT'S "The Deal" of the chapter title! What a twist!

Now that I think about it, you never exactly described what Ilya's outfit is like other than the one she had at the beginning... Unless she's still wearing it... Why do I have such lewd ideas?
jaredhimself31 chapter 5 . 4/11
I actually like this Kayaba more than the Canon one. He is cold, calculating, even somewhat cruel, but ultimately his purposes are more or less benign, and as far as I can tell he is not allowing countless thousands to die, like they did in canon. That factor alone, makes your Kayaba better that the normal one, the fact he is actually trying to help Illya is just icing on the cake, granted he is doing it to buy her silence. I cannot help but wonder, if this is supposed to be a Fate Good ending Shirou, or a Heaven's Feel Good ending Shirou. Illya, Rin, and Sakura are all alive and well, so it cannot be UBW, so hmm? I wonder... Perhaps a hybrid route Shirou? Maybe even Hollow Ataraxia?
Lunatic-Over'9000'Lord chapter 4 . 4/8
Wait! Where's Kibaou?!

And I can't believe that this guy appears before Kirito! If he actually appeared, that is...
Lunatic-Over'9000'Lord chapter 3 . 4/7
So Asuna was introduced before Kirito? Didn't expect that.

[Ancient Harry]? With green eyes, glasses and a sort of red and gold motif? Why do I have this strange sensation of "Deja vu"?
Lunatic-Over'9000'Lord chapter 2 . 4/7

And Saber must be... *nose starts to bleed* such a sight... *killed by a pointblank Excalibur Blast*

*revived by the reviving item from SAO* And I think you should add some Grail-kun segments, if you know who Grail-kun is...
Lunatic-Over'9000'Lord chapter 1 . 4/7
Well... You made a typo : It's supposed to be "Akihiko", no "t" in the name.

Well looks like Shirou's stuck in a game where "People die (in real life) when they are killed (in the game)"... He he he... Get it?

Now I wonder : Will there be a... Special joke... in chapter 16:5? You know what I mean, right?

*after seeing Ilya hug Shirou* Well now THAT is cute! Awwwwww...
TimothyLim chapter 59 . 3/25
Is that a SAO Sacchi gag about Tsukihime Sacchin because of a similar name? Love all this story thus far, your world building and characterizations are very good and fun to read.

Though, I wish the dead ends/dojo was a tad less, however gotta love the subtle nods to FSN and other Nasuverse that is passed around unawares to SAO specific casts between Shirou and Illya.

Thanks for the chapter and your efforts.
TimothyLim chapter 5 . 3/22
Hmm, looks like Ilya has to lead Shirou around with lies? Not sure how I feel with that reveal, thanks for the chapter.
TimothyLim chapter 3 . 3/22
Well this will be a strange tale, if everyone has spells. Well onwards I suppose! Thanks for the chapter.
TimothyLim chapter 2 . 3/22
Haha! Nice to see a dead end route like the VN! Hopefully it won't be a common occurrence though, I can see it disruptive to the story, but it's a fun start! Onwards Shirou to being Archer maybe...
TimothyLim chapter 1 . 3/22
Wow wow. Great writing and in-character thus far, what an interesting take on SAO I'm very interested at where you take it! Especially with FSN elements put into the mix!

Thank you for hard work, you got me hooked.
CsRB chapter 3 . 3/22
Chapter 3 - is that Harry Potter?
Wandering the Arid Sea chapter 43 . 3/19

deadal chapter 59 . 3/2
ranged weapons are now allowed? did you plan for shiro to follow the old archer-SHIRO stereotype? is this the dawn of the white archer?
Eberhardt chapter 41 . 2/20
Hrmm, it's obvious Ellis Bell is based on Kayaba, but that NPC

Wait...was that *actually* Kayaba masquerading as an NPC?
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