Reviews for The Veiled Asari
Ulcaasi chapter 23 . 2/14
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAND FAVOURITED. YES. YES YOU HAVE ACCOMPLISHED YOUR GOAL OF CREATING TWO CHARACTERS I ACTUALLY NOW CARE ABOUT AND FIT IN THE UNIVERSE BUT THEN YOU WENT AHEAD AND AXED ONE OF THEM. I rarely ever read stories with OCs as the main(I do believe yours is the 2nd or 3rd) AND IN EVERYONE OF THEM SOMEONE(usually the OC that I've now fallen in love with) DIES SOME SAD OR HORRIBLE DEATH. TTATT WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

Time to start work one the rest of the stories all over your profile. *cracks knuckles* Let's do this.

Oh right! If you do wish for me to run through the story again to help pinpoint all those typos/grammar errors let me know :)
Ulcaasi chapter 11 . 2/14
Oh noooo. Don't do this to me now. I knew what I was getting into when it was revealed that she's an Ardat-Yakshi but still... ;_;
Ulcaasi chapter 8 . 2/14
Ugh. The story is so intense and real and turning my emotions all over but then there's also an Elcor guarding the door and I can't help but laugh
Ulcaasi chapter 5 . 2/13
Oh damn. Ouch. Shit. That hurts. I mean I could sorta guess that they were self inflicted but still. Holy crap that takes some insane courage. Or perhaps determination rather.
Ulcaasi chapter 2 . 2/13
I do believe this is the first OC mass effect story that has successfully caught my interest. More because I've never actively searched for OC ME stories but that's beside the point. Came across your "Rise of the Asari" story and I must say the first chapter and story summary had me intrigued. It also kindly directed me to read the rest of your works prior to get a better understanding of it.

I think I just stumbled on to a gold mine of stories here with interesting storylines(and good English). I've only seen a few minor typos/grammatical mistakes. I can point em out if you like, just let me know. Cant wait to see what's in the next few chapters ahead. :3
magnusvictor chapter 17 . 12/1/2015
Oh, come on! When you get the opportunity to kill a person like that guy, you don't just shoot them in the head! Aim for the kidneys (more-or-less directly behind the lower ribcage on a human), and let them bleed out from that. Supposedly, it's pretty much the most painful way for a person to die.

That being said, it was nice to see someone get Karma'd.
Spikesagitta chapter 23 . 4/15/2015
Noooo... That..is...sad :(
Guest chapter 23 . 12/10/2014
WOW this genuinley excellent writing not just this but like pretty much anything that even slightly ties in with Rise of the asari i can actually believe this is part of mass effect i can tell you put heart into this keep it up man.
Guest chapter 1 . 12/3/2014
You keep mentioning the Shepard and Liara versus the high school reunion story but I can't find it and I would love to read it. Did you take it down or something? Anyway... I love your stories they are awesome! Can't wait to read more!
roguegalaxy chapter 23 . 11/14/2014
What a great story, and a bittersweet ending! And for Felina to meet Liara of all people. It made me wonder if Aethyta ever knew about Felina.
roguegalaxy chapter 16 . 11/7/2014
Oh god, poor Marion. I knew it was coming, but it wasn't any easier. Heart wrenching stuff but well told!
roguegalaxy chapter 12 . 11/6/2014
nice chapter showing more of Marion's background. it's interesting how uncomfortable she seems and him even when he's a little older.
roguegalaxy chapter 9 . 11/5/2014
Poor Felina, I hope Benezia didn't actually leave her to a justicar like that.
roguegalaxy chapter 3 . 10/29/2014
yay Benezia isn't the mother! And Felina's poor face :( she and Marion are quite the pair.

This is gearing up quickly!
roguegalaxy chapter 2 . 10/29/2014
ohhhhh snap, Felina T'Soni? that should be interesting! And Marion and Felina are off to a bumpy start. I'm looking forward to reading more!
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