|Reviews for The Legacy|
| Guest chapter 11 . 4/16
This is at best 200k word Fic stretched by a pointlessly and painfully slow training montage to 700k. You can literally edit out most of it and it would actually make it a better story.
| Therysinx chapter 1 . 3/25
Don’t think I can continue this. Well written for the most part. Was expecting a “grey” Harry to not be a little bitch. Can already see that DG is portrayed in a demanding bitchy way and Harry would just accept everything.
| Therysinx chapter 25 . 3/25
Not a huge fan of DGHP fics where Harry is just a understanding kind little boy while DG bitches at him.
| Therysinx chapter 25 . 3/25
I don’t think I’ve skipped through a fic as much as I have in this
| Therysinx chapter 11 . 3/24
Seems like a lovely, well written, abandoned fic with lots of non important info and a demanding Daphne. Hopefully Harry doesn’t turn into a little bitch.
| GinsengH chapter 36 . 3/24
I have a feeling that I am approaching 300k words in this story, and I think this is a good time to give a more comprehensive review.
Overall this story is well written. Scenes easily transition from one to the next with plenty of detail to paint a picture. Most of the characters also seem to be well thought out as well and are easily recognizable to their canon counterparts.
I really appreciated your notes in ch1 which laid out what to expect from this story. I share your beliefs on many of the pieces that you outlined. More than that though, the way that you handled some of these separate plot pieces deserves a lot of praise. You not only acknowledged things like the Ginny/Harry romance, but then you also gave all of the many reasons that they wouldn't work/Harry wouldn't want it to work. The lack of Dumbledore bashing was also refreshing. While the story did highlight that Albus was in fact fallible, it also allowed actions to be rectified without completely undermining the character.
The handling of Horcrux Harry was interesting. I'm not sure if I have come across a version exactly like it before. It did seem like a good way of not only handling the "Harry has to die" piece of the story but also giving him a powerup with Voldemorts knowledge. The one thing that I will say in the negative about this though was that it seemed as though the story was intentionally slowing down Harry's rate of integration with Voldemort's memories once they hit the summer break. I'm guessing that you just didn't want to have an overpowered Harry, but it contributed to the story really getting bogged down when they get back to grimmauld place. I don't think that it would have been unreasonable for him to continue a high rate of integration in order to put him on the same playing field as Voldemort.
The only major criticism that I have is how Daphne has been handled to this point. When looking at all of the scenes that either feature who or talk about her, she really just seems like a contradiction. As far as I can tell this is a Harry/Daphne story. She's not quite a racist, but she does have bigot qualities. She may not outright hate Harry, but she was rather cavalier about Harry's life in multiple instances. I'm not sure how someone with such a flippant attitude towards another human's life could ever be considered as being compatible with Harry (even a partially Voldemort harry). She has only been combative and ungrateful with Harry even after all he has done is show her kindness and understanding.
All her character seemingly wants to do is stay out of the war, but she also didn't seem all that opposed to becoming a death eater either if the situation called for it. To a degree that is understandable because she's a very selfish person (another reason her and Harry would not work) playing to whichever side gives the best chance of survival. However, with her being so self serving, it doesn't really make sense why the grimmauld place events have become so slow. She understands that she was forced into one side of this war by Malfoy, and she understands that running away isn't a safe option either. However, she seems to be less willing to join the Light, after she has already been forced into that position for survival, than she was of becoming a death eater when she was still neutral. While there have been snippets of a deeper character, like her feeling bad when she thought Hermione's parents died, those pale in comparison to all of the other foundational actions of her character which suggests that she is not a good person. While people can change over time, that would still be quite the paradigm shift given what this story has established as her foundation.
| GinsengH chapter 11 . 3/22
I plan on leaving a more thorough review of this story later, but I have to say something now.
I've been an avid reader on this site for the last 14 years. "Pyromaniac" is easily in the top 5 comedic moments of my fanfiction life.
| Ricky chapter 82 . 3/15
Thank you for writing and sharing this story, I really enjoyed reading it!
| abhinavvemuri123 chapter 73 . 3/3
Daphne is kinda a hypocrite. She must know Harry's secrets but in the previous chapters "She's allowed to keep her secrets, isn't she?"
| Spark of Fate chapter 56 . 2/23
"So, what has Harry to her?" I think it should be was, not has.
Also, why bother destroying the original wand? The issue with the Twin Cores was already resolved when he picked up the second wand. That was the entire purpose of it. He said it himself that we would use it for the fight against Voldemort. Destroying the original wand was redundant.
I guess you could chalk it up to letting him get experience with the wand. At the same time, he could've stuck with the original wand for everyday things (since everyone knows about it), and keep the second wand hidden, using only when he was training or was doing a mission.
Could've used that fight as an excuse to train with the secondary wand after losing his primary wand so early in the fight.
Also would've help keeps his primary wand cleared off any nasty spells he has to cast. Can't trace it back to him with Prior Incantatum if they only know about the original wand.
Plus, it's easy to tell that you are setting something up with the "evil" secondary wand.
| Spark of Fate chapter 54 . 2/23
"International travel has seized to exist". I think you meant ceased, not seized.
| Spark of Fate chapter 52 . 2/23
"he had the impression it didn't elevate the tension in her". I think you meant alleviate, not elevate.
| Spark of Fate chapter 52 . 2/23
| Spark of Fate chapter 48 . 2/21
I hate that is taking so long for them to get together...
| Spark of Fate chapter 44 . 2/21
I WANT THEM TO KISS ALREADY! Why must you torture me with a ridiculously long build up?!