|Reviews for King of Everything|
| arthur.moebius chapter 8 . 3/14
Now all we need is a cameo from SMELL YOU LATER Gary and Red
| arthur.moebius chapter 4 . 3/14
It's VERY detailed, and well written at that! Keep up the good work, and maybe try to combine the speakers instead of keeping it as two completely different points of view, change it up a bit just to have something unique, just a little tip ;)
| Niyomi chapter 2 . 8/28/2014
I'm really enjoying this story so far. You have a pretty cool set-up and I like the little touches of comedy here and there. I'll leave you some constructive criticism if anything ever comes to mind but so far it looks good. )
| Gallantmon7196 chapter 10 . 7/17/2014
I like this story, the romance is slow going, which is perfect, and all of the characters are memorable. I do wonder what happened to the Absol though.
| xXFrostKittenXx chapter 8 . 2/14/2014
It's not going down hill! There's what, a "to" when there should be a "too" when Ieri and Leon are trying to see who's battling, but your battle description was a lot better than what I can manage. I try to write a battle, and my character decides to fall asleep XD
The interaction between Leon and Lindsey's funny, and I think his thoughts towards his mother are very natural.
I am kind of glad Ieri didn't immediately hit first place, though, even though I think second is pushing it a little. I understand there are some advantages to having a breeder for a father, but I'd like to see a bit more of how hard she works, considering she came in with only three Pokemon instead of four. Maybe after they get back to the school there can be a training day?
| xXFrostKittenXx chapter 7 . 2/4/2014
Hopefully you pick this up again, it's really good .
| AnimaStar6006 chapter 5 . 12/10/2013
Your hard work paid off Melody
Btw is it okay if I address you as Melody in my reviews? "
Anyway, so far it's really good. The last two sentences were kind of confusing...I don't get it...unless it's going to be explained in the next chapter...
| Xova chapter 5 . 12/10/2013
This chapter was significantly better than all of the others. The characters conversations and actions seemed warranted by the situations they were in; it was like it was real life, and that is a hard thing to achieve. I'm liking where this story is going more and more. Keep on writing. :)
| Xova chapter 4 . 11/22/2013
Another great chapter. How long are you planning on making this story? I don't see any notable antagonist, besides Amber, who would be able to create a challenge for our heroes.
I loved everything about this chapter, especially the slight tension between Leon and Ieri. My only little nit pick was that the beginning sounded a bit summary-ish. It worked itself out very quickly though, so all in all, it was a great chapter. Can't wait for more!
| Xova chapter 3 . 11/5/2013
Another great chapter, albeit somewhat uneventful.
Also, because I have pretty bad memory, I keep forgetting which name is associated with which Pokemon, and it gets tiresome going back the first chapter to check and see. Just referring to the Pokemon as Breaker the Lucario, or even just Lucario would help bunches.
I can't wait for more!
| Xova chapter 2 . 10/23/2013
As before, I found very few errors- or at least none that I can really gripe about. This is a wonderful story and I am truly excited for more from you. More people really need to read this story.
I'm pretty curious as to what you, in your own mind, imagined happening with the 'dual Dragon Pulse'. I've never heard of anything like it before, nor how it could be so severely damaging. However, I suppose that since I cannot truly explain exactly what a Dragon Pulse is, it does make sense in and of itself.
Write on, my friend.
| Xova chapter 1 . 10/22/2013
This is an extremely interesting premise you have here. Most trainers start at the age of 11, schooling being a long forgotten aspect, let alone college (I assume it's a college just because the name sounded more like a college to me. I have no idea how old either of the characters are).
I love your writing style and characterization. I'm excited to see where you will take the rest of this story, and how long it will be.
Ordinarily in my reviews I will leave some criticism too, but I cannot seem to find any issues in this chapter- kudos to you. Can't wait for more. You've earned a follow from me