Reviews for Pokemon: The Origin of Species
BigBlimpin chapter 3 . 9/20
The interesting aspects of this chapter are a bit dampened by the fact that canonically Arceus has type plates that correspond to the established types.
WouldYouKidnapA chapter 1 . 9/11
very interesting take on how you made red choose charmander. I like it
Cyberchao X chapter 59 . 9/9
Oh, so Mewtwo's already here. An interesting interlude.
Cyberchao X chapter 58 . 9/9
Wow. That was intense.
Cyberchao X chapter 57 . 9/9
I see. I take it this is to set up the possibility of Mewtwo? I hadn't even considered how hard it would be to fit Mewtwo into this setting. I love how intensely this story considers the necessary science for the Pokémon World.

I also enjoy Red's awkwardness. Great relatable protagonist.
Mal chapter 59 . 9/6
Holy fuck... I loved this chapter. I'm always a sucker for evil villan who is more than just evil, who is more than he/she seems. Great chapter.
Sana Lama Samaha chapter 59 . 9/6
Woah. I've mentioned it before, but I really love the story building that happens when you shift away from the adventures of the main cast. Like this underground market for renegades. I guess Tahu was the one reading Leaf's impressions when she met Giovanni. And also that Mewtwo's condition is actually a failsafe.

The mysteries increase! Who would need a pokeball hacker? Did Sakura get spared from her execution? Giovanni uses pokeballs as a 'termination' method! What did Dr. Collins do wrong?

It was nice to glimpse into Silver and Giovanni's relationship. Not just in the way Silver studies his father, but what he does for him as his 'mirror'.
lynnell246 chapter 58 . 9/6
I know others don't but I ship Red and Leaf I've shipped them since the 3rd chapter.
Guest chapter 58 . 9/4
I liked to chapter but I feel that some of the posts are not only missing the point but are also remembering past events wrong. Leaf likes Pokemon, she cares what happens to them but she is not stupid, she isn't ignorant but does have her beliefs. Leaf was shocked by red's feelings and how little he thought of Pokemon so of course she was being irrational. I feel like red is giving himself over to what he thinks leaf would like too easily and it's a bit sad
Guest chapter 58 . 9/4
I'm upset uryuu seems to be dead, she would have been interesting
oddanon chapter 59 . 9/2
Good chapter. Some points:
* "...after I left the ball, ...". I had a difficult time telling whether this meant "after I exited the ball" or "after I left the ball behind". I first thought it was the former, and that this person had somehow managed to create safe human storage. Later context indicates the latter, but it's very unclear. Unless that's deliberate, you may wish to change the wording.
* The trade in captured renegades is interesting, but somewhat hard to believe. The idea that people sentenced to death are actually given new lives elsewhere sounds hard to do in practice. This implies a very large conspiracy, and it would be really easy to expose it. The presence of psychics makes it even harder to hide, though I suppose that it's mostly dark renegades, which is why Archie implied that it would be easier to get darks than non-darks. Still, one person found to be another person (DNA evidence or whatever), would blow up the whole thing. It also seems irresponsible to use these people as public gym members. What if someone tries to look into their background? Do they not have any sort of facial recognition things here? Have none of them ever tried to contact anyone from their "past life"?
* Since Giovanni mentioned the possibility of collaboration between Archie and Maxie, I assume you're not working with their canon goals. This is a bit disappointing, because Archie's goal makes *so much sense*, and is about as close to a win-condition as this world could get. Pokemon are dangerous as they are largely because of their diversity. Hundreds of different species each with their own awesome powers is hard to fight against. But if you could just brute-force kill most of the species by drowning them all? There would be no more graveler, muk, magcargo, raticate, parasect, alakazam... Almost all Pokemon species would die, except those in captivity. They have to breathe. Even the storm birds presumably have to roost sometime. A world completely flooded is one that humans could survive in, but most Pokemon couldn't. Water pokemon and maybe some flying types would survive, but that's extremely manageable compared to the current havoc. Build some big boats, use some water pokemon, all wild pidgeots and such will die but captive ones will survive, and humanity just got a huge advantage.
* In canon, Gold and Silver started their journeys three years after Red and Blue became Champions. It's hard to tell whether Gold is the right age for that here?
* Giovanni just killed a guy in front of his coworkers. How on earth does he get loyalty from these people? He sounds like a tyrannical dictator whom everyone would want to overthrow and replace with someone who won't kill people for failure. (Presumably G intends to eventually revive the "dead", but they don't know that.)
* How do you train a geodude to explode? For that matter, how is that allowed, with pokeballs forcing pokemon not to ever use attacks that may harm a human?
Literary Prinny chapter 59 . 9/2
Giovanni, the man, the myth, the legend! From the first time you introduced him, I got serious Quirrel vibes from him, which is both a blessing and a curse. However, by this point in the story, and with this chapter in particular, I believe he has been sufficiently differentiated, and made so, so much more interesting in the process.
The Giovanni/Quirrel comparison, I believe, is where the true weight and complexity of the Pokemon universe shines through. The Harry Potter universe seems quite sane and reasonable compared to the Pokemon universe, which makes Giovanni stand out all the more for it.
What's more, compared to a lot of characters, I feel like, for now at least, Silver and Tahu are less characters, and more ways to apply a truncheon to the heads of readers until they start paying very, very close attention to the minor details of Giovanni.

This chapter has raised some questions in my mind. We know being a renegade is the super-duper worst crime you can do (probably) that either gets you executed, or sold into criminal slavery, and murder apparently gets you a decade or two. I'm curious as to what the rest of the legal, and Crime and Punishment systems of the world are. If the difference between killing someone yourself, and having a poor, expendable bug type do it (poor bugs) is 10-20 years versus execution, what are the differences between theft, and Pokemon-assisted theft? What about theft OF Pokemon, or tampering with occupied balls? How about Pokemon-induced manslaughter, where the Pokemon was out of control when it happened?
None of these are probably very important until they come up, but those are the kinds of questions on my mind after this latest chapter, the obvious questions about Mewtwo's fate and Giovanni's dealings with Team Magma and Aqua aside.

Is Archie going to finally get his chance to wrestle Kyogre?
Is this piece of literature going to be the one to finally address the fact that Kyogre has feet that leave footprints that it never seems to use? Or that it can walk in the first place? Kyogre is a very strange fictional mythological sea-monster.
Little Follower chapter 59 . 9/2
The many faces of Giovanni. He's quite the character, and seeing him from so many different perspectives is endlessly fascinating. Even so, his inner thoughts are just as inaccessible to the reader as they are to any psychic...there is no telling for sure what he truly feels. Still, even without anything concrete, his calm disposal of Mr. Collins, and apparent disregard for collateral damage in the video recording that Silver watched...they don't paint a particularly happy picture, and shed doubt on any apparent sincerity he otherwise displays.
Guest chapter 59 . 9/2
adhnksobsvsbkjsqopr. Thanks for updating :)
Jeffery Mewtamer chapter 59 . 9/2
Love how you're delving into some of the lore the games and supplementary material to the anime barely touch upon and how you're working to integrate events the games claim take place simultaneously but are never/barely referenced outside their source game. I'm interested to read how you might turn Maxie and Archie into reasonable men that Giovanni wouldn't deem existential threats while maintaining their rivalry that only the threat of Giovanni siding with the other prevents from erupting into open war.

Scaling Aqua/Magma's goals to using Kyogre/Groudon to help repair regions devastated by drought/flooding would make them more reasonable than their Canon goals seemed, but that would make their opposition harder to understand.

Also, here's something else to consider: the end of this chapter implies Giovanni is about to respond to the same Storm Bird Attack the Trio are, and much of the chapter implies Mewtwo is still under Team Rocket's control. So the question is: What did Misty and her Lieutenant come across in Cerulean Cave? Did one of the test subjects from the other facility escape and is being covered up, either by the staff so even Giovanni doesn't know, or by the author to conceal the fact. Or did the Mewtwo we've seen in past interludes escape and leave a decoy that fooled even Giovanni?

I'm not usually one to reread stories, especially when it seems like I always have more stuff I've yet to read, but I find myself tempted to reread at least the interludes for details I missed/forgot/would reinterpret given knowledge of later events.
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