|Reviews for Apotheosis|
| littlewhiteguineapig chapter 12 . 4/6
Love, love, love your story please continue I can't wait :)
| fan chapter 1 . 4/5
| Guest chapter 12 . 3/9
Please update! :)
| Guest chapter 12 . 2/13
this is so keep writing
| Guest chapter 12 . 2/10
I love this fic! I started reading it yesterday, and I binge read until I finished today! I feel like I've been through the emotional ringer! You have to finish this fic! Please please finish this! I wanna know what happens with Thor and Jane/ Thor and Loki!
| Vampi chapter 12 . 1/21
Ok first i have to start off in saying this is going to be a negative review, but i will try to be as professional as possible, so please don't take it too personally but more as an act of trying to make you see a bit some faults of the story. I don't like leaving overly negative reviews, but since i read the whole fic hoping it would get better i couldn't resist in just giving my input. First with the positive...
I really do like that this time Jane is the one that is in angst compared to all the other Lokane fics in which Loki is the one that is broken and in pain, though that would be in character and you do show him a bit like that towards the later chapters. I would think that with this fic you would go more into the dilemma in which Jane has to deal not only in being the significant other to the Crown Prince of Asgard but on top of that being a girlfriend to one of the Avengers. I'm sure being both of those things would not only mark her as a target for Thor's enemies not only in Asgard or in space or in the other realms but on Earth where Jane lives.
Unfortunately, while the beginning chapters were good in conveying her inner struggles to come to grips with her new life i feel that she suddenly made really rash decisions for no reason that contradicted her dilemma, and i feel that isn't like her. This is a scientist that thinks things through and i would think after the events that transpire when first meeting Thor and the danger it evoke she would be more cautious.
Some of the things that were kinda irrational were thinking that earth was just a distant memory even tho she just left it moments ago. I understand she's feeling alot of pain and is afraid for her safety and just wants a normal life, but i don't think she would distance herself from her own planet so much. Jane, tho human, is tough in her own way and i don't see her just throwing away her life to hop around realms with Loki (especially Loki) because she's afraid of Thor's enemies (and Loki is one of them). As a matter of fact i think through her travels to the realms she would realize that she would just have to face her responsibilities and return to earth, and that in some twisted way that Loki made her realize that, even though that wasn't his intention.
Another thing is of trying to flee from Loki and going on that trip, like, even Bruce had to spell it out for her that Loki can appear anywhere he wants, it was just a dumb plan for her to drive across Canada to just get away from him, she should've just called SHIELD or ya know Bruce to let him help. Her keeping Loki a secret from Bruce and SHIELD especially Bruce, was just dumb as well, but i think you did that to make the story more dramatic so i'll let that slide.
I think she would realize being with Loki isn't something she wants either. This sudden attraction to him came out of nowhere and that leads me to one of the negative aspects i find in this fic; her out-of-nowhere sudden loving emotions towards him and just abandoning everything to travel with him. It seems rush and just abrupt. I didn't feel you build up their relationship at all, it felt quite shallow and it just made me think of her sudden infatuation with Thor in the movies; as in, she's in lust rather then having this deep love for him. That she's only into him because of what he can do rather then who he is. It makes her seem selfish and quite literally dumb in that aspect. Yes Jane in the movies is eager to know about other worlds, but i think her scientific more rational side would caution she would have to thread carefully before putting her life in the hands of beings she doesn't necessarily know too well and have hidden agendas.
While Loki is in character somewhat in some aspects of the story (deception and that horrible illusion he did to her in the end being the ones that stand out). His sudden attraction to Jane and emotions toward her come out of nowhere as well. The two had nothing but contempt with one another and i don't think he would've fallen for her and wanted her with him while he was a fugitive.
The only way how this story,imo. that this can work to salvage what worth it has is that you go all the way and make it seem that this was a long con from Loki and all of this was planned out from the beginning to strike at Thor.
I don't see this deep love/emotion he has for her. Everything seems shady when it comes to him in this fic, and i think you should just go with that. That yes he might be attracted to her in some way, but in the end he was lying to her the whole time and that voice she heard in her mind thinking is Thor was just Loki disguising his voice. For example, i believe he never lost his powers, i think he had them the whole time. His mysterious walks alone in the forest is probably him going back to Asgard for awhile to see how Thor was doing, as in, to see that Thor was trapped somewhere because of Loki's own doing. I believed there was no war in Asgard and he had Thor trapped while he made sure to play his con with Jane as the "mortal" Loki without Thor interfering. And i believe Thor was going to see Jane until Loki did something to him. And lastly, i think its him as Thor in the final (for now) chapter. All of this would make sense if he was written as the antagonist in this fic. I might even go far as to say he made that deer jump on her car (maybe he even was the deer knowing him) that made her have that accident. Simply put, he should just be the antagonist to this story there's just no other way i see this fic being believable without that happening.
Even with all that about Loki i do feel he is quite lonely just traveling the realms alone and being a fugitive, and as they say, misery loves company and Jane was the company he wanted. I do feel somewhat Jane has to realize that being a fugitive is something not to take lightly and she has to look at Loki and how awful his life is now, if she's willing to go that extreme and abandon her home like he did and never staying on earth (of course Loki visits Asgard to raise hell but it seems he will never let Jane return to earth, so she doesn't even have that luxury that he has). She has to realize the predicament she's in now is because of Loki as well, he put her in this position, in some way he was the one that ruined her life from the start ever since the Destroyer incident in New Mexico.
While i do love how Bruce is it is weird his sudden concern for this stranger he's never met. I thought at first maybe Thor told him to look after Jane while he was gone, and that would've made a bit of sense, but he started getting interested in Jane somewhat. It's so weird i would never think of a Jane/Bruce ship, but i think in this fic it fits. There conversations are much more deeper and better then Loki and Jane's. While Bruce's concern is abrupt and sudden i think Bruce would try to help a fellow scientist in need.
It's just weird that Jane believes that if she met him first before Thor she would go for him and she holds herself back because of this blind devotion to Loki, but nothing in her personality now indictates what would be a hindrance for her to go with Bruce now, it just feels like you're shoehorning Loki with Jane for no good reason. Bruce has been a fugitive and now Jane is to, while not as extreme as Loki, at least Bruce is a kind soul and is looking out for her safety, Loki is as selfish as ever and just wants an itch scratched, nothing in your version of him indicates he cares for Jane and when he verbally says sweet things to her i can't help but feel its insincere and is part of a big deception plan. It's like in some way you're trying to force justification with her being with Loki when all points indicate she should be with Bruce since he is the one whose been there and will do anything for her safety, Loki has done no such thing and has done the complete opposite. I honestly think you really should make this a Jane/Bruce fic, the Lokane thing is just not fitting here in a romantic sense. I love Lokane don't get me wrong, but for this story it doesn't fit IMO.
Another negative with this fic is that you tend to be very descriptive about trivial things, like for example what she's having for breakfast and whatnot. It tends to drag the story too much and i feel there wasn't alot of dialogue or interactions with the characters, thus why the Loki and Jane attraction just didn't work because there wasn't alot of interaction until the later chapters and by then it felt shallow and rushed.
This one is a little nitpick about Jane but she's an astrophysicist and her visiting the other realms you would think she would be amazed and would want to find out about the stars there, but when she goes its like, i don't know, its not like she's not in her scienetific mindset which is kinda OC like she's just reacts like some tourist rather then a scientist wanting to know what makes a particular realm tick.
Anyway, i see you haven't updated this in almost half a year and i don't know if you'll ever update it or just straight out abandon it altogether. But even though my review is negative i hope it helped somewhat and you do continue it. You have potential to be a good writer and there are some errors in your punctuation and sometimes even lack of punctuation, but since you said you had only 2 chapters left for this fic, i hope you conclude it. Again, sorry if i was overly harsh, i try not to be, but i just wanted to give my opinion that's all, don't take it personally, my review comes from good intentions. And sorry for the long review.
| Misabel the Miserable chapter 12 . 1/2
Well, I'll start by saying that I LOVE this story. It's original, well written and I can't really find fault with it at all.
You've written Loki very faithfully. Too many ff writers of Loki have a tendency to make him uncharacteristically soft and a little too sane. You've kept in the cruel, unstable elements of Loki that are integral to the character, and now you're beginning to explore his very great, if smothered, capacity for intense emotion.
Jane is also very well written, as OOC as her terrible experiences demand but still recognisable as herself.
Please, please, PLEASE keep writing. I can see you haven't updated for a while but I'm hoping you'll continue, and haven't abandoned the story completely. It would be a great pity not to finish this, as I think it has such potential!
| audraell chapter 12 . 12/30/2014
Great story! Very unique. I hope you continue to post. I read this so quickly! I'd love to read more!
| BarbyBBones chapter 12 . 12/13/2014
Hey, I'm your new reader, I really love your story, please continue
Xoxo Barby *I'm sorry if I write something wrong, english is not my mother lenguaje*
| sunnyontheheights chapter 12 . 11/29/2014
Ahh! When is the next update? I can't wait any longer; I have to know what happens next!
| Guest chapter 12 . 11/23/2014
I know it's rude to do this and I apologize in advance, but... do you think you'll ever update Malleus Maleficarum? It was so good and I've been hoping for an update for over five years now.
| denisemurasaki7 chapter 1 . 11/19/2014
Please update! With this story I started to like Loki and Jane as a couple. Pleaseeee Updateeeeee!
| a.c.ryder chapter 12 . 11/14/2014
OMG! This story is so amazing! The characterizations are perfect, and you writing is just stunning. I hope you continue soon. :)
| Saoirse.Ash chapter 12 . 9/22/2014
Aaaaaah why did you stop here?!
| CornMuffinsMama chapter 12 . 9/19/2014
The suspense is killing me! This is such a great story, I can't wait to read the rest.