Reviews for The End
Homfrog chapter 3 . 8/18/2014
The first-person perspective was unique, and you write Sylvia well, but the violence was senseless and a little disproportionate. It was captivating up to the point where Hater began to seem overpowered. But overall a skillfully crafted story.
Night-Waker chapter 3 . 7/30/2014
A SEQUEL AND BOUNTY HUNTER SYLVIA YES! :D
shaylynn chapter 2 . 6/28/2014
The first one best ending ever but the other one I cried but THAT WAS AWSOME!
Guest chapter 2 . 5/26/2014
That was sad... and beautifully well written!
kittycat212 chapter 2 . 2/1/2014
Chapter 1 and chapter 2 were amazingly descriptive chapter one was great I feel sorry for hater though chapter two let's just say this was pretty gory like you said I am so sad how wander died though in my mind I was crying like a lunatic
Guest chapter 1 . 12/30/2013
Awwww wander is SOOOOOO cute! Have u ever thought of turning wander into a werewolf? Or werenormad? Or whatever he would be.
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smoll Gcat chapter 2 . 12/14/2013
Imagine the ire she would feel after she got herself together enough. It would be immensely powerful and terrifying. Imagine.
Netbug009 chapter 1 . 12/5/2013
I really like how descriptive and emotional your writing is, but Wander felt really OOC in the flashback which made it kinda hard for me to accept what was happening in the present. Wander just seems to prefer passive methods of handling things over getting excited at the notion of violence.
Roxasolina Lombardi chapter 1 . 12/4/2013
... awsom
Lord Cookie Crisp of Baahaala chapter 2 . 12/1/2013
I CRIEEEEEEEEED! SOOOOOOOO SAAAAAAAAAAAD! Lol, sorry. Im a huge dork for this show and would probably loose my mind if Wander were to die for real in the show. Id be crying in a corner for a month or two. Still, great story, even if it was super sad.
Lord Cookie Crisp of Baahaala chapter 1 . 12/1/2013
OMG read this a while back I loved it and I still love it now. Great job!
Toodles!
violeterin chapter 2 . 11/27/2013
Amazing. Wow. So sad. Great writing!
dalek chapter 2 . 11/13/2013
NOW THAT MADE ME SAD :(
poor wander, the optimist, just dead... And yeah that was way mare gore-y. *sobs*
though, I have to say you did a good job with this, very descriptive...
dalek chapter 1 . 11/13/2013
they never should have gotten that sword at all...
this made me really sad, poor Hater, he's pone of my favorite characters. Ah no, who am I kidding I like Wander, hater, Sylvia, and commander Peepers.
MarcelineFan chapter 2 . 11/14/2013
Um, Night-Waker, I'm pretty sure I said NOT brutally honest. Did you read the end author's note right? I did say it TWICE. But your criticism is very thoughtful and well-written. I appreciate the fact that you cared enough to tell me how you REALLY felt. It made me think about how I write my stories from now on.

While I realized that Chapter 1 was anti-climatic, I already knew because of the fact that that was how I wanted the end of the story to be when I said it was 'more subtle'. And the thing about Wander being highly traumatized and not relieved was a good idea to corporate into the story, which is now just a fumbling mess of big words and descriptive scenes.

But Chapter 2 was honestly probably the worst thing I have ever written. I had a much better version somewhere in the 'Good Alternate Endings' file in my brain, but as you can see, my brain is highly disorganized. To be honest, I was the same thing when Wander's death scene came up. 'Maybe I should add some final words to make this more climactic and dramatic, since it is a tragedy/drama after all,' the open-minded side of my brain said. But the stubborn side replied with, 'But why would I do that if I plan on jamming a diamond sword blade through his chest? He would be dead in seconds!' My stubborn side won the argument and, well, this was the result.

I really wanted to post this before I completely forgot about it, which is why I posted both of the chapters at once. I feel as if I didn't give this story my all like I do to AND (A New Dimension). But this is just a side-story to AND, which will be my main focus until it is done. So don't worry, my work will slowly start to improve soon enough.

Until then, thanks for your thoughts and ideas, and see you on the next AND update!

-MarcelineFan
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