|Reviews for A1: The Alpha Trolls' Session|
| pattoo12345 chapter 56 . 10/16/2019
Can someone please list all of the trolls' lands in this story? I went through the whole story and only caught 9/12 Land names. Damara: ? and ?
Rufioh: Woods and Creatures
Mituna: Brain Matter and Synapses
Kankri: Temples and Ruins
Meulin: ? and ?
Porrim: Bogs and Frogs
Latula: ? and ?
Aranea: Fog and Shine
Horuss: Towers and Steel
Kurloz: Plains and Thunder
Cronus: Jade and Prosperity
Meenah: Murk and Depths
| FINISH YOUR SHIT chapter 55 . 11/28/2018
"and i finish my webcomics"
if you dont finish this piece of shit
i will pour
down youR MOTHER FUCKING ANUS
WITH A SPOON
THAT WAS IN THE FUCKING FREEZER
FOR 2 YEARS STRAIGHT
also like how many 3rd graders could you beat up if they came at you in waves of 7 and every 7th wave a 5th grader miniboss came but every 14 waves an angry parent and a 5th grader boss came in along with the third graders
| ur greatest fan chapter 36 . 11/28/2018
let me pour hot sauce down your anus
| tvtable84509 chapter 54 . 10/26/2016
In general I really love the way you didn't miss any small details. This is a very well written piece. Awesome job
But a thing I would personally like to see more of is explanation for some things like how the felt are doing the exact thing they did in thier intermission in homestuck as thier intermission here.
| The Amazing Nerdlord chapter 10 . 10/18/2016
"asses are papped not slapped" is my new life motto thanks.
| catachthonicCacaesthesia chapter 53 . 9/27/2016
Okay, I absolutely adore your story! I would have reviewed earlier, but I wanted to wait until I finished up to the most recent update.
Firstly, I really appreciate the complexity of your story. How you've not only focused on the A1 Session trolls, but also the Midnight Crew, the Felt, Lord English, and other characters I may have forgotten to mention. Most fanfics I read don't really focus on characters outside of the humans/trolls, and even then they wouldn't really give those "minor characters" any build. That is something I can really appreciate when it comes to your story.
Your form of writing, although not entirely "elevated" (though I see no reason of it being elevated, it's just a thing most other authors adopt when writing a story), is incredibly engaging. Though, I do recommend you try and proof-read a couple of times, but even then there could be minor mistakes here and there. If not already, try having a Beta reader help you out if you want to. Anyway, that's just a tiny suggestion. I love your way of writing nonetheless. I especially enjoy the numerous references of jokes within the fandom, such as the "High Sollux" comic regarding the stealing hands joke, as well as the classic Stairs joke.
Lastly, I would just like to mention that your work featured some errors regarding canon. I wasn't going to mention this before, but since you've mentioned it twice I just need to point it out: Beforus has only one moon. The bubblegum one. The green one was created by Doc Scratch, and therefore didn't exist in the previous iteration of the trolls' universe. This is, again, just a small mistake. I just felt the need to point it out, that's all.
Also, Meulin and Kurloz were mentioned to have broken up after Kurloz had had that nightmare and deafened Meulin. I'm not really concern about this one either, as your fanfic is doing awesomely without these particular aspects anyway. :D
Anyway, despite my criticism of very minor components of your work, I love this fanfic to death. The way you are able to let the audience see within the minds of the characters, even some deemed as "unimportant", is fantastic. You've made them easier to relate to, especially Cronus and Damara. (And thank Gog you haven't made Damara so sex-crazy! XD So many people do that it's unbearable!)
Also, as typical of a Homestuck I can get, I love the ships that you've explored, specifically those that aren't very familiar. Because of you, I'm all of Horuss x Porrim as Kismesises! XD Although, I would like to state that I personally wish that the fanfic itself wasn't so romance-oriented, but I still love it the way it is! :)
Well, I hope this review helped you somehow. And I really hope to see an update soon! I am so excited to see what other things you have yet to reveal to us! The questions are piling up like crazy yo! This is truly a wondrous fanfic; I hardly ever get to see adventure-based works. I just wish that you have the time and motivation to finish this fanfic off. I mean, I can't blame you if you don't, but I don't want this work to be a waste. I really do want to see more, and I'm sure many others do as well.
Anyway, that is enough of my blabbering! Hope you have a wicked time doing whatever! Again, I hope this helped, and if you're willing, I hope to see your work to the end! :)
| Senpai.Kush chapter 1 . 7/27/2016
COME TO MY PROFILE. THRILLS! DRAMA! HUMOR! VIOLENCE! SEX! COME ON DOWN AND GET SOME OF THIS SHIT! YOU WILL FALL IN LOVE WITH ATLEAST ONE OF MY FANFICS. MAYBE 2. SO PLEASE ACTUALLY READ THEM AND LEAVE A REVIEW AND SHARE IT! IM TRYING TO BECOME FAMOUS HERE!1111111one11111
| Guest chapter 2 . 6/14/2015
I think it's kinda neat how you replaced the T's in their acronyms with U's
| happilyTraumatized chapter 8 . 10/10/2014
The only really big thing i need to comment on in tjis chapter is Jack's part. I didn't understand at first whst was going on with the clothes you described, but then i realized that you were describing the prototyping that was taking. Then i wondered where is Jack? He's not in thebeta timeline because thats Bec but then he can't be in the alpha timeline because Jack didnt wear the ring in the Alpha session, (that was lil'cal and a certain cherub). The only rings in that session was the one that aranea has and the one DD has. Unless I understood Homestuck wrong (and correct me if I did), i dont understand where Jack is. Or this could be your own twist seeing as hussies doesnt go into the carapaces role in the dancestors session...or anything in their session really. Other than my confusion, this chapter was very homestuck and the recap was very hussie. Nothing short of brilliant on your part.
| Pahey chapter 21 . 10/1/2014
the pokemon-esque battles are hilarious xDD
| LordPeanut chapter 50 . 8/7/2014
Wow so much happened in this chapter! :0
It was great that you wrote from almost everyone's point of view, with 15 Felt members it's sort of hard to keep track of all of them without neglecting a few.
In the end only three died right? Quarters, Matchsticks and Crowbar, if I didn't count wrong.
That was smart, kicking the MC into the future like that, it keeps things more linear and easy to follow.
To be honest I actually thought that the intermission would elaborate more on the two teams the Felt have split up into but the MC is always welcome, they're pretty amazing.
All in all, I think the chapter totally delivered all the suspense of your foreshadowing, great job :)
Ps: LE is a douchbag.
| Guest chapter 2 . 8/1/2014
I think I'll have Legend of Korra Book 2 Trailer Theme Song Loop while I read this!
| LordPeanut chapter 49 . 7/9/2014
Oh my gosh it's the party! More like battlefield.. :I damn these troll kids
This was really exciting to read, there were lots of suspenseful moments, especially during the battle and when Cronus decided to jump on the LE bandwagon.
In canon though, none of the other trolls, or better Aranea and Meenah, since those are the two we see talking about the others most, seem to know who messed up where and who is responsible for their ultimate failure. I mean yeah, they kinda suspect Damara and neither of them like Kurloz and Cronus very much, but they don't seem to be openly hostile against them. The same goes with Meulin, yes, she helps Kurloz serve LE, but none of the others see it quite as obviously as in this battle. Having said that, it was so great of her to finally stand up to him instead of just obeying like before. Shame that it didn't help :/
It's also great that they talked about each of their problems like civilised trolls and even though it ended pretty bad, it's good that at least some have sorted out their problems, like Rufioh and Horuss, and Kankri and Latula.
I'm looking forward to the Felt chapter! :D
| happilyTraumatized chapter 7 . 6/25/2014
I love this chapter because it gives a new insight to Damara. It is very parallel to Aradia's "I'm 0kay with al0t 0f things" and how Damara understand that they are all doomed. This chapter also gives a softer, guarded, and pained side to Damara that most people don't understand in canon. I actually sympathized her after i read this chapter because you make it very clear that she is hurting, but she just can't show it or she is too prideful to show it and she doesn't see the benefit because "sore wa muimidesu" (translation: it is pointless). on the flip side, i love/hate how she kills TINKERBULL! first Tavros, then Jake, then Damara. Sweet sweet Tinkerbull. But, i also love how Damara is playing Rufioh. it just adds to her conflicted, hidden, and destroyed personality, she could let go and "use" Rufioh to help her, i don't know, not be a psycho. Lastly, i really like the ending with the description of the prototyping, i never really thought of prototyping that way that one little addition ,no matter how harmless, gives the imps and enemies an advantage. It makes it pretty clear now that no matter what you do, unless you don't prototype *cough void session*, there really isn't a safe item to prototype or one that will make them weak or anything, which i really like. Really happy with this fanfic and i look forward to the next updates! ;3
Cat Face For the Win X3
| LordPeanut chapter 48 . 6/23/2014
Yes! That was so perfect! The fight was exhilarating, fast paced and I really couldn't guess who would win! The ending whooaa, but that means that Meenah can't become godtier unless she dies on the quest bed inside Derse's moon, now.
So Kurloz is bleeding to death huh? Hmm we never actually found out about anyone certainly being god tier except Meenah, Aranea and Rufioh, as far as I can remember, who said that his wings weren't god tier wings and said he definitely wasn't the rogue of breath, so who knows what might happen next :0
And Damara knows that Kurloz is on LE's side now, okay. Groups are forming I see.
I loved the 4th wall jab haha and don't worry you did great on fish puns! I could not have thought of half of those :I