Naruto is far weaker than he should be, does not utilize clones, he could easily pump a clone full of chakra and send it to the hideout and create sub clones to train, but he does not. He was always going to lose to Orochimaru, but the execution is disappointing. Obito knowing about his heritage comes across as forced since there is no foreshadowing and assuming Zetsu is loyal, there's no reason for Obito to know. Unless he noticed the big brain decision to use Amaterasu twice while under the scrutiny of several villages.

Using Amaterasu against a summon is a big brain move. With Jonin strength, it should not have been an issue. Even Shadow clones would have been a better thing to risk revealing.

MARCHED YOU FUCKING RETARD! IT'S MARCHED, NOT MATCHED! GET SOMEONE WHO CAN SPEAK ENGLISH OR STOP WRITING, BECAUSE I QUIT! FUCKING HELL!

Most of what you did was pointlessly contradictory. The fact you left people with the same personality and outlook after everything was said and done was upsetting. They didn't learn from what Naruto did and held onto their arrogance so shout have been either cast out, imprisoned, or eliminated. They were poison to themselves and those around them for still thinking that they were the victims. Naruto also seemed to waffle about in most of his logic as he wanted the world to stay the same but let others do the work to make it better. It felt like nothing was ever earned or achieved by the end of the story, only taken. That felt cheap.

Sorry, but this story turned out middling and unsatisfying.

Third time am reading this story. Stl gives me the chill every single time

terrible

disgusting cringe

im at ch26

That’s not how the eternal mangekyou works, man. They don’t take out their own eyes, they fuse them with their family member’s, so he wouldn’t have to replace his eyes with Madara’s. Madara’s Rinnegan was actually his true eyes which were fused with his brother’s so Nagato has them. I guess you had to change that to make it so Naruto can have the EMS… Only other ways would be to take Obito’s and Kakashi’s eyes, make Sasuke awaken them and take them from him, or steal itachi’s or Shisui’s. Danzo has one and I think Itachi still has the other one. Any of those would be very difficult to accomplish.

Also, I haven’t mentioned earlier, but you use a lot of wrong words here and there. Incarnate for example has nothing to do with fire, I think you meant incinerate. Thanks for fixing jinchuriku to jinchuriki. You also tend over-explain a bit. There’re a lot of times when you explain something that is apparent without it. Look at your paragraph, if you’ve mentioned who he’s attacking already, switch to pronouns, or nothing at all. It is implied in the English language who he is attacking. Show don’t tell. Otherwise, I really like this story. Awesome work.
I understand a lot of this was criticism, but hopefully you take is a constructive. I would imagine you write and post here to get some feedback and improve. Great job so far!

i got tired with this pink trashbin

aww i was waiting for the happy ending especially the make up with mei

Das hot

sincerely fuck u jiraya and hiruzen

I wish I was reading this as it was coming out so I could suggest Karin or Temari as a pairing because there are so little out there.

Why are most of the Narutos in your fics literally completely mentally disabled