Reviews for On The Run
lunea chapter 18 . 4/1
Hi, I really like your story - it is a great idea. However in the last few chapters I noticed a bit of a case of dragging scenes out. I say recognized, because that's what happens to me and I tend to get stuck in the story. What helps me, is mapping out the points I want to go to in the story and try to get there faster, sort of writing within a script. It's good when you have writers block, it gives you a plan. And it helps me to keep my story leaner, and not write around and around a persons feeling or situation. The danger of that is, you get repetitive and boring. Say what you want the audience to know how this person feels or what they think and keep it short. Continue on with the story until you get where you want with the chapter. Then you can always go back and sort of emphasize and build up certain scenes you want to highlight. When I get stuck, sometimes I write a scene, that I may use not now, but in a later chapter, but writing it gets me ideas on how I get from where I am to the next "stop".
I'm not sure this makes sense to you, but if you don't understand - never mind. Keep up the great work. cheers.
Cooltreeko chapter 18 . 3/19
ack! plz update asap I am so totally looking forward to the next chapter. :D
Guest chapter 18 . 2/24
This is by far the best story ever! Pleasee update soon! Waited for so long, worth it. Next week update? Maybe? Haha xx
Stacey73 chapter 18 . 2/24
So happy to see an update. I had not lost all faith you would continue this story, but i was starting to worry a bit. lol... Hope inspiration attacks you and you are able to put out another chapter soon. Look forward to seeing show down with her father. I so hope you keep them together and have a romance continue with Jessie and Riddick. Thinking have them all three go off together and set up somewhere new. Then maybe have Riddick and Jessie go off together to fly somewhere for supplies or something and maybe have them crash land on a planet and they have to help each other survive. Just thought. I know you will come up with something great. Thanks for sticking with this story!
cooltreeko chapter 17 . 11/18/2014
NUUU! WHY MUST IT BE SO SHORT. ;n; *cries hysterically* this wonderful piece of perfection made my heart race, and flutter. you can't even imagine how deep I dove into this story. :)
Flowerchild23 chapter 17 . 11/17/2014
wow. Riddick is so sweet. lol.
Stacey73 chapter 17 . 11/17/2014
Short but sweet. :) So glad you are still writing this story.
cooltreeko chapter 16 . 9/5/2014
NUUU! ;n; I ran out of story... update soon please. :) I am just loving it, everything is so well thought out, and you can leave huge clues that are well hidden, like that 'birthmark' that was a tracking device. I should have seen that coming from a mile away, but you made it seem so insignificant that I had no clue, till the last 2-3 chapters I read. I love how detailed it is, but it's not so overloaded. keep going, and don't give up. :)
cooltreeko chapter 8 . 9/4/2014
you are doing awesome. :3
Flowerchild23 chapter 16 . 8/11/2014
Wow More Please
JessieHillx chapter 16 . 7/30/2014
I NEED MORE.
Stacey73 chapter 16 . 7/28/2014
Really good chapter. Look forward to the next. Hope your computer problems get fixed soon. Please keep writing this story, i look forward to your updates no matter the wait. thanks. :)
dragynfyre18 chapter 16 . 7/28/2014
So glad you are back. It has been a long time, but you just made the wait worth it. Thank you for a great chapter, I hope you can get another one out soon.
Siobhan.B.Bad chapter 15 . 6/27/2014
When are you up dating?! I'm loving this storyline. Please don't let me wait...haha xx
Transformers' BABY chapter 15 . 6/2/2014
Yay she's free now Jessie smashed that evil device that kept u chained up to your father forever
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