|Reviews for New Devil of The Gremory House|
| Lightningblade49 chapter 11 . 9/30
Wow Azazel... wow.
| Fan-Of-FictionX01 chapter 11 . 9/25
A very good setup chapter and a fantastic way to start the Excalibur Arc. Really looking forward to seeing how Naruto changes things since a lot of crazy stuff occurs, and with Naruto added to the mix its gonna get even crazier.
As always, the grammar/spelling was great with only a few minor issues and the pacing of the chapter was also very good, though I felt like the Perverted Trio comedy segment could have been a little shorter (it did give some nice insight on Issei's view of Naruto though). I also would have liked some more Naruto scenes but considering his current situation it makes sense that he is absent.
Like most chapters in your stories, I once more applaud your sense of humour. This entire chapter was loaded with hilarious scenes like Kiyome talking to Rias, the perverts and especially Issei talking to Ddraig. I don't know why, but the thought of a legendary dragon spirit making penis jokes is hysterical to me.
Speaking of Ddraig, I wonder if Naruto can hear him too. I assume that Naruto still has Kurama inside him (but dormant or something) since the extraction process would have killed him. So maybe he could also hear Ddraig since he too has a spirit inside him. Furthermore, when Ddraig mentioned a change in the world's balance, could he have been talking about Naruto?
I also really like Koneko in this chapter. It was obvious that she was frightened of Naruto due to his use of Senjutsu but she still felt ashamed that she was being so hurtful to him. It really shows the dynamic between them. I really hope when all this is over that Naruto can teach her how to use Senjutsu. Oh, and it was also cool that you mentioned Gasper, can't forget about him...
On a different note, it was great to see Irina and Xenovia and I'm looking forward to seeing what you do with them. I don't know why, but I'm eager to see Xenovia's opinion on Naruto, for some reason I feel it would be interesting...
Now, onto Azazel. I think you have really captured his character well in how chill he is all the time. Though I am currently a bit puzzled as to what he plans on doing with Naruto. I mean I understand Azazel has an obsession with knowledge and new discoveries and stuff which would make Naruto pique his interest, but kidnapping a member of the peerage of the current Lucifer's sister? Really? How is that a good idea?
On the topic of Naruto's kidnapping, I still don't get if his chakra works now. I know he could use Jutsu in Sage Mode, but can he do so outside of Sage Mode too? Cuz if so, why doesn't he just use a Substitution to get out of the cuffs? Meh, we'll see...
Speaking of Naruto, is he gonna miss the Excalibur Arc and only arrive at the end to beat Kokabiel? I honestly hope not, especially since I would really like to see his reaction to Kiba's obsession with Excalibur (which would certainly remind him of Sasuke). Anyways, even if he does miss most of the arc, don't forget that Naruto is still the main character so make sure to give him ample scenes in each chapter, even if he doesn't do anything really major.
I'm also curious about the pairing. Since this is DxD, I assume its gonna be a harem (though judging by your bio, not too big). Personally I'd like to see Rias (who is pretty much confirmed), Akeno, Rossweisse and maybe Xenovia. If you do plan on making a bigger harem maybe you could add Yasaka, Gabriel, Kuroka or maybe even Kiyome. Anyways, I'm not gonna bore you with reasons why each one would fit but I personally would be happy if any of them are included.
Now for a couple of minor criticisms I have:
Firstly, there was a small inconsistency in this chapter. Rias and Koneko commented on Naruto living close to the Academy when in chapter 6 Rias noted that Naruto lived really far. Not a big deal but yeah...
Secondly, I find it hard to believe that Naruto would be influenced by the malice when in Sage Mode. He lived his entire life with a massive entity of pure hatred and malice that tried to influence him every time he got angry so this should be nothing he can't handle. You could argue that he wasn't prepared this time but I hope it doesn't become a regular occurrence.
Thirdly, I was a bit caught off guard and disappointed by Naruto's reaction at the end of this chapter. I like your portrayal of Naruto in this fic since even though something made him bitter and cynical, beneath all that he still is Naruto (and hopefully we will see more of his real self in the future), but this seemed completely OOC. Your Naruto is snarky and rough but this made him seem like a thug with anger management issues. Imho he should have made some smartass comment about being handcuffed to a bed by a strange middle aged man, or maybe something more aggressive but not to that extent. Oh well...
Anyways, great chapter and I'm eagerly awaiting the next one :)
| Agent Frank Underwood chapter 11 . 9/2
I am loving this story, you're doing really well with the Romance.
| cg037 chapter 11 . 8/16
Great story, keep up the good work.
| daniel 29 chapter 8 . 8/11
kiyome, rias, sona, tsubaki and maybe koneko if this story goes the harem route these 5 in no particular order have some interest in naruto in 1 form or another that could develop into love
| daniel 29 chapter 9 . 8/11
despite the different chapter names chapter 3 is the key to everything because naruto would put everyone's problems into a different and more sensible perspective
| plums chapter 4 . 8/6
Why is Naruto so weak? Seriously, he's no stronger than Issei here. It's frankly an insult to "Naruto" to even be calling this OC character Naruto at the moment.
| qwertypous chapter 4 . 8/2
i'm fucking frustrated with this story. seriously why the need to write some parts in the story that we already know what happen,
| qwertypous chapter 1 . 8/2
that's sucks.. a pawn? seriously..
| Zeus501 chapter 11 . 7/27
will naruto ever get a familiar?
will naruto ever get his chakra coils fixed?
and is this a harem?
| Zeus501 chapter 1 . 7/27
MATT SMITH WAS MY FAV DOCTOR EVER!
| Velial13 chapter 4 . 7/27
Naruto screamed in pain? Really? He never done that before, even when Sasuke drived a chidori to his lung he just grunted, and now he screams... his condition is worse than I thought
| Advanced-ZeroX chapter 11 . 7/26
I Cant wait!
| Stygian Gallade Knight chapter 11 . 7/25
Highly enjoyable. Please continue to make quality work like this.
| ImayHaveaName chapter 11 . 7/22
Holy shit this one has me pretty hype for the next chapter.