Cody The Pikachu: Hey there, everyone, and welcome to my newest one-shot FanFic: One Coarse Meal! I know what many of you are thinking...but here's a different way you would want this to end. I've gotten positive reviews on A Pal For Gary: Alternate Ending, so why can't I do the same for One Coarse Meal?
Like many of you, I was disgusted by how it ended...which is why I either avoid the ending of that episode or skip it altogether. In a nutshell, after finding out Plankton was scared of whales, Mr. Krabs goes around in a whale costume (as his daughter Pearl) to scare his rival until he cracked. Unable to take it anymore, Plankton tries to commit suicide, but SpongeBob tells him some fear Krabs has, and he finally got revenge...
...until SpongeBob had to ruin it. Thus, Krabs got away entirely with driving Plankton to near suicide. But here...he ain't getting away this time. Now here's the disclaimer.
Disclaimer: I don't own SpongeBob or its characters.
Publishing Date: January 7, 2014 (Seekers: Forest Of Wolves comes out!)
One Coarse Meal
SpongeBob SquarePants was busy mopping the floor of the Krusty Krab, humming a song to himself while doing so. It had been quite peaceful around here without Plankton trying to steal the Krabby Patty secret formula; in fact, it was two weeks since he last saw him. He did see that Mr. Krabs had been walking around with an ominously smug sneer on his face, but he knew better than to ask what was up.
Better not say anything, he decided while mopping. Or else I'll get my paycheck docked...again.
But as he mopped, he heard loud sobbing coming from outside and dropped whatever he was doing. When he opened the doors of the Krusty Krab, he saw a sad scene. Plankton was looking very fatigued, crying and looking like he hadn't slept in weeks.
"What's the point of going on? I'll just be tortured for the rest of my life by that whale!" the tiny villain lamented. He then lied down in the middle of the road and muttered, "That's it. I'm done. The 4:15 bus should be here any minute now."
Now SpongeBob was really concerned. Despite Plankton being the enemy, suicide was a very serious matter. Wondering what he could do to help, he walked over to him, looking both ways to make sure no buses were coming this way.
"Hey Plankton," SpongeBob greeted him in his usual cheerful way, though he was deeply worried. "What're you doing lying on the street?"
Plankton looked up and glared at him. "Go away, CheeseHead! Can't you see I'm trying to get run over here?" He sat up all the way and added, "Or better yet, just step on me as hard as you can, will ya?"
SpongeBob shook his head and said in concern, "I'm sorry, Plankton, but that flies in the face of my good nature."
"Really?" Plankton asked in an unimpressed way. "The face of your good nature, you say? Did you forget invading Squidward's house every day...and even made your house like his? Or the time you brought a monster home and scolded Gary for driving it off when it attacked you? Or kidnapping everyone to save the squirrel from this 'rodeo'? Or-"
"Okay, I get it," SpongeBob stopped him as he thought 'How did he know that?'. "Why're you trying to commit suicide? You know it won't solve anything."
Plankton sighed and laid back down on the road, muttering, "Forget it. I'll wait for the next bus."
SpongeBob backed away with a sigh, knowing that he had to do something to get Plankton out of this funk. Perhaps Mr. Krabs could help; after all, he and Plankton were best friends once.
When he got back into the Krusty Krab, he went right to his boss's office, where Mr. Krabs was apparently writing something down. The evil chuckle he gave was a giveaway hint that he was up to no good with something. SpongeBob knew he had to be loyal to the crab, but it was hard to when he was gloating about Plankton getting what he deserved. So he gave a knock and went in.
"Mr. Krabs, I just wanted to let you know that Plankton's lying down on the street...forlorn," the plucky yellow sponge informed him.
"Really? He's a mess!" Mr. Krabs laughed in his pirate laugh.
That concerned SpongeBob a lot. It looked like Mr. Krabs really didn't care if Plankton died or not; it didn't matter if they were enemies right now, he needed help. With a deep breath, he said, "Mr. Krabs, I know you and Plankton are both sworn enemies and all. But putting on a costume to frighten him? Isn't that taking things a bit too far? I think you need to stop doing all this to Plankton right away."
Mr. Krabs glared at him. "May I remind you of the fact that you've disclosed the location of me safe, where I keep the secret formula?"
"Don't remind me, sir," SpongeBob sighed. "I broke the rule concerning the location of the secret formula. I'll go fix it."
And without a backwards glance, he left the building. All the while, he thought, Looks like he won't help. Maybe I can. These pants may be square, but now we'll think out of the box!
When he got back outside, he saw Plankton still laying out on the road. He was even groaning something like, "What does it take to get run over around here?!"
"Hi Plankton!" SpongeBob greeted him, walking up to him.
"Have you got seaweed in your ears?!" Plankton asked angrily, glaring at him. "Take a hike!"
That was the day when he trained him to be assertive. SpongeBob chuckled, "Yes, I remember. But I just wanted to tell that the secret formula is not, I repeat NOT, in the safe behind the painting in Mr. Krabs's office."
"What difference does it make?" Plankton wept. "There's no point ever since I've been tortured by that blasted whale."
SpongeBob gave him a gentle smile. "Don't worry. Everyone has a secret fear! For instance, Mr. Krabs's secret fear is..." He whispered into Plankton's...wherever he kept his ears. "Mimes and money being destroyed."
Plankton looked up in surprise. "Really?"
"Yes, and that was Mr. Krabs in whale suit that you've been afraid of.
"So you're saying that this whole time it was Krabs masquerading as a whale?" Plankton asked in shock. Now he looked really furious as he learned the truth and snarled, "Why that conniving bottomfeeder! You need to help me get revenge!"
SpongeBob looked to the side a bit. "On one hand, I usually don't like revenge, and he IS my boss. On the other hand, I see you need help after all the psychological torture you went through. So...sure!"
Plankton nodded. "Okay. So here's what we're going to do."
In the Krusty Krab office, Mr. Krabs felt like gloating some more as he put his whale costume on. He was keeping Plankton away from his restaurant by disguising himself as his daughter Pearl, for he was scared of whales. When he heard SpongeBob tell him about the little pest lying on the road ready to be run over, he practically rejoiced. With him out of the picture, he could finally win once and for all.
"This is almost too fun!" he chuckled as he walked out of his office. "Plankton ain't even a challenge no more!"
"Oh, is that so?"
He looked down. There was the pipsqueak, staring up at him with newfound confidence. Krabs knew it was time to ruin his confidence with more whales.
Mr. Krabs scoffed, "Oh, Plankton. Back for more, are ya? Okay, here it goes." He took a deep breath and gave a big loud "Boo!"
Plankton just sneered. "You don't scare me anymore, Krabs."
"I ain't Krabs, I'm...uh..." Mr. Krabs backtracked until he made his voice sound like Pearl's. "I mean...I'm Pearl, not Krabs."
"The jig's up, Krabs," Plankton declared, no longer feeling afraid. "I know all about the suit AND your secret fear!"
"Secret fear?" Mr. Krabs repeated. He took off his mask and switched back to his regular voice as he asked, "What do you mean?"
Plankton summoned a robotic arm to trap Mr. Krabs and squeeze him as he said, "See for yourself. Enjoy the show!"
And just like that, a mime walked into the restaurant, doing whatever mimes do. Plankton looked around and got the reaction he desperately wanted. Mr. Krabs' eye grew wide with horror and shock when the black-&-white fish got nearer.
"No. No!" Krabs shouted. "Make it stop! Please!"
"Doesn't feel so good to be on the other end of the stick, doesn't it?" Plankton cackled. "I feel wonderful! And one more thing...Mimey! Show him what happens when he messes with Bikini Bottom's most evil mastermind!"
The mime walked over and picked up the cash register, which Plankton knew Krabs loved more than anything else. He took all the money in the register and walked out of the restaurant while Plankton turned around to see the reaction. Mr. Krabs cried "ME MONEY!" before the arm released him as he ran inside his office.
Meanwhile, SpongeBob walked out of the kitchen while making Krabby Patties and watched his boss run into his office. He felt he had to be loyal to Mr. Krabs and the restaurant itself, but he felt he needed to step out of his shadow for once. SpongeBob looked down at Plankton, knowing now that he had taken his advice to heart and finally conquered his fear of whales.
Plankton looked up at the sponge. "Thanks, SpongeBob. You were right. Suicide isn't the answer...this is!"
"Anything I can do to help. So Plankton...you ARE going to try and steal the Krabby Patty formula today, right?" SpongeBob asked tensely. "Not that I'm wanting you to."
"Not today, SpongeBob, not today," Plankton said with a relieved sigh. "My revenge is complete now. I'm gonna go back to the Chum Bucket and get a well-deserved rest. Rob you later!"
And with that, he ran out the door.
Once Plankton was gone, SpongeBob let out a small sigh and headed back to the kitchen. Now that all that was done for now, he could finally focus on his job.
"What is going on around here?" Squidward the cashier was now looking at him through the kitchen window. "I can't even take my mid-morning nap without all that screaming!"
"I think Mr. Krabs finally got a grip on reality," SpongeBob said in a snarky tone, surprising even himself. He got himself back to his usual self and asked, "Why, what's wrong?"
Squidward looked at him in a confused way before muttering, "Whatever. Just get these orders done, SpongeBob."
SpongeBob nodded, said "I'm makin' 'em now", and got to work. As he flipped two Krabby Patties at a time, he said with a smile, "SquarePants...your work is done."
Cody The Pikachu: Well, there you have it! You all wanted to see Krabs pay for what he did to Plankton, and there you go! It's kinda like A Pal For Gary Alternate Ending since I saw that said story was given positive reviews. So I decided to help out and do another alternate ending...and there you go!
Why SpongeBob isn't much of his usual self...I noticed that he would never say no to his boss since he's become a doormat of sorts. So here...he'd be a bit more serious yet still be optimistic. By the way, I think he could be his pre-movie self here...but I digress. Or maybe not. But still, I hope you all liked this.
So read and review! Anyone who does so will receive virtual plush dolls of SpongeBob (when he's good) and voodoo dolls of Krabs. Oh, and you'll also get pizza and drinks. I don't allow any flames or else they'll be used for underwater fires.
Patrick: Hey, if we're underwater, how can there be a-
Cody: I get it. And I allow advice and constructive criticism as long as it's not harsh.
See ya next time!