Chapter 11 Space War
Disclaimer I do not own Smosh. This is just a story for fun.
The Smosh team took off into space in their ship looking for Ethan and his ship. Suddenly the ship appeared and started to fire lasers at them! Stevie was at the wheel of the ship and started taking evasive maneuvers. T-bag found the ships turret and started firing back at Ethan's ship.
"Yeah take that boy!" Shouted T-bag as he fired like a mad man.
The blast had little affect on Ethan's ship. Ethan sat in his command chair grinning wickedly.
"Time to call Smosh and tell them my new plan." He said as he pressed a button on his chair.
On the Smosh ship Ethan's face appeared on the monitor grinning wickedly.
"Greetings Smosh." Said Ethan.
"Oh man it's that creepy elf guy again!" Cried Ian.
"You fools may have foiled my first plan to conquer the world, but your luck has just ran out. My new plan is way better and way more destructive. I plan to launch several nuclear missiles at the Earth and wipe out everybody on the planet. After that I will rebuild the planet and make it into a new empire for myself." Said Ethan.
"That's completely insane!" Cried Anthony.
Ethan just laughed and the screen went black. The Smosh team just looked at one another in fear. On board Ethan's ship Ethan pulled out the magic button and wished for several nuclear missiles. The missiles were then loaded up and pointed at Earth. Walter stood by nervously.
"Um...sir. May I suggest a different course of action. This seems a bit extreme. This could really cause damage to the future." Said Walter.
"NO! This is the new plan and were sticking to it! I will not be beaten by those dumb guys again!" Shouted Ethan with a mad gleam in his eyes.
Walter backed off nervously. Ethan just laughed madly. On the Smosh ship the Smosh team was trying to think up a plan.
"Ok guys we need to come up with a plan or we are officially screwed!" Said Ian.
"Well my idea is just drink all the booze in the ship. I will hopefully be so wasted that I won't even notice the nuclear explosion that will kill us." Said Charlie as he started drinking a beer.
"Man I'm down with that!" Said T-bag as he joined in on the drinking.
"I do cartwheel!" Said Phuong as he did a cartwheel.
Ian and Anthony just groaned.
"Why don't we just teleport over to the other ship and attack it from the inside." Suggested Fat Guy.
"You know that might actual work." Said Anthony as he turned to the rest of the team. "Ok me, Ian and Fat Guy are teleporting onto the ship. The rest of you try not to die."
The rest of the crew nodded as Ian, Anthony, and Fat Guy teleported over to Ethan's ship.
On Ethan's ship a couple of guards were in the bathroom. One was in a stall reading a magazine, while another was at a urinal. The guard at the urinal had just finished his business and was fixing to zip his pants up, when all of a sudden Ian, Anthony, and Fat Guy appeared before him. Both the guard and the group of intruders screamed in shock at one another. The guard started to grab for his sidearm.
"Um...dude your zippers down." Said Ian.
The guard looked down to see that his zipper was indeed down, while he was distracted Anthony clubbed him in the back of the head with his gun knocking him to the ground in am unconscious heap.
"What the heck is going on out there?" Cried the guard in the stall.
The guard stumbled out of the stall with his pants half up, he ended up tripping and knocking himself out.
"That was easy." Said Ian.
The three of them walked out the bathroom. They split up. Fat Guy went to look for the engine, while Ian and Anthony went to look for the control room. Ian and Anthony made a wrong turn and ended up in the airlock. They were fixing to turn around, but were confronted by Molester Moon and a couple of guards. Molester Moon held up a knife and laughed.
"I'm going to molest you!" He shouted as he and the guards closed in.
Ian and Anthony backpedaled into a wall. Anthony felt his hand brush up against something and saw a control panel.
"Hey Molester Moon, your about to be sucked!" Shouted Anthony as he pushed the panel.
The airlock opened up and started sucking. Molester Moon and the guards were sucked up and thrown into space screaming. Anthony and Ian held onto the wall for dear life. When the villains were gone Anthony pressed the panel and closed the airlock.
"Sucks to be those guys." Said Ian.
The two of them left the airlock and went looking for the control room.
In space Molester Moon floated around spinning in circles. The evil moon could breath and space, so he was fine, he was trying to figure out how to get ack to the ship, when suddenly the Smosh ship appeared before him. Charlie saw the evil moon and took control of the turret.
"This is what you get for trying to molest me you dopy wanker!" He shouted as he fired the turret.
The laser blast hit Molester Moon and he exploded! A part of his smashed into Ethan's ship. Ethan just starred at the remains of Molester Moon as they bounced off his ship and floated away.
"They may have defeated that idiot, but they won't defeat me!" He declared as he pulled out a nasty looking pistol and the magic button.
Fat Guy finally arrived in the engine room where he was confronted by Skinny Dude.
"Fatso." Said Skinny Dude.
"Toothpick." Said Fat Guy.
The two of them shot lasers from their power gloves and pushed against one another in a power battle.
In the control room Ian and Anthony had finally arrived. Ethan stood before them pointing his gun at them as Walter stood by nervously pointing his own gun at Ian and Anthony.
"Your to late Smosh! In a matter of seconds my nuclear missiles will launch and attack the Earth! You got front row seats to the end of the old wold and the beginning of mine!" Laughed Ethan insanely.
"Dude this is absolutely insane! First you kill our lame cousins with robots, then you tried to kill us with the robots. Latter you sent us a plutonium bomb in the mail to kill. After that failed you went back in time kind napped our ancestors and tried to rewrite history causing the strangest apocalypse ever! You need to stop this man! We sorry we made you have a bonner and kept you from having the magic button." Said Anthony.
"You fools are the only ones to have ever to defeat me! I've faced elves, cops, FBI agents, CIA agents, P.E.N.15 agents and beat them, but two YouTube celebrities managed to beat me. Do have any idea how humiliating that is?! This is personal! You wounded by pride now I'm absolutely going destroy you and your world!" Declared Ethan.
At that moment Walter spun around and pointed his gun at Ethan.
"Sir you must stop this madness! It's completely out of hand! Your threatening to destroy the past Earth and start a new kingdom...your crazy plan will destroy us all!" Cried Walter.
"Oh great another guy who thinks I'm insane. First Santa thought I was crazy now my personal assistant. Guess I'll just have to kill you to Walter. All I want for Christmas is Smosh to be dead and a new assistant!" Said Ethan as he was fixing to pull the trigger on his gun.
The room suddenly became colder and the air was filled with the sound of jingle bells. There was a bright flash of light and Santa Clause was standing in the room.
"Santa!" Cried everybody in shock.
"Yes it is I. Hello Ian and Anthony, you two have been very old boys this year and I'm here to help you out." Said Santa.
"Get out of here fat man!" Snarled Ethan.
"Ethan your still a naughty boy I see. Here's a lump of coal for you!" Said Santa as he pulled out a weird gun and fired a lump of coal at Ethan.
The lump of coal hit Ethan in the groin making him fall over in pain. Santa walked over to Ethan, kicked his gun away, took the magic button away, and handed it to Athony.
"Here you go boys. The rest is up to you. Merry Christmas!" Said Santa as he vanished in a flash of light.
Ethan staggered to his feet and hit a button on a control panel. The nuclear missiles shot out of the ship and raced towards the Earth! Ethan laughed insanely.
"Oh man what do we do?!" Cried Ian.
"I know what to do. Magic button I wish the missiles were heading back to the ship." Said Anthony as he pressed the button.
The missiles abruptly turned around and raced towards the ship.
"Will be killed!" Cried Walter.
"Magic button I wish everybody except Ethan was on our ship!" Cried Anthony as he pushed the button.
Everybody on the ship vanished except Ethan. The evil elf looked helplessly at the the missiles that were racing towards him and his ship.
"BA HUMBUG SMOSH!" He shouted as the missiles hit the ship and exploded!
In the Smosh ship Anthony, Ian, Fat Guy, Skinny Dude, Walter, and a few henchmen appeared. T-bag pointed his gun at the henchmen and forced them to surrender, while Phuong did a cartwheel into Skinny Dude knocking him out. Fat Guy quickly took Skinny Dude's power glove away.
"Lets head home." Said Ian.
The ship teleported back to the present. In the present the strange apocalypse had suddenly vanished. The Smosh team appeared back at P.E.N.15 headquarters. The henchmen and Skinny Dude were arrested. Walter managed to work out a deal for himself by telling the government everything about Ethan's organization and contacts. Petter gave the Smosh teams gold medals before Fat Guy teleported them home. Ian and Anthony were shocked to see that their home was rebuilt by P.E.N.15. They walked in and sat on the couch.
"Man I'm bushed time for a little Walking Dead." Said Anthony as he and the rest of the team sat down for a well deserved rest of TV and snack food.