Disclaimer All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by Sjdavis84 andStillDreaming85
"What does my father have to do with Nonna ignoring me?"
"She knows your Swan's daughter, and to her, your father was the enemy," he said.
"So she hates me because my father was an officer?" I frowned.
That was not like Nonna. I always thought she was better than that.
"I don't think she hates you Kitten. I think she was shocked to find
out after all these years." Edward shrugged.
"You think she would have been happy that he put Dimitri in jail," I chuckled.
"It's not that Kitten. She is very protective of her family and while
she wishes Dimitri would plummet of the face of the earth, Charlie's
involvement, well he also put a lot of my family away," Edward said,
scratching the back of his head.
"I'm sorry." I don't know why I felt the need to apologize.
"Kitten, fucking hell. I killed your family, and you're
apologizing…Fuck…I killed your family." He couldn't mask the pain in
I didn't want to talk about this. I wasn't ready to talk about this,
but then again, I don't think I will ever be ready to talk about it.
At times, I want to know everything that happened that night and what
led up to it, but then I don't. I don't want to know a damn thing.
It's a constant battle I have with myself. I have times where I look
at Edward or Ronnie and the question sits on the tip of my tongue. I
want to ask so much, but then I back down because I'm afraid of the
"Edward." I placed my hand over his to get his attention. He had that
look on his face again. He was thinking about things he shouldn't,
beating himself up about them.
Maybe it would be good for the both of us to talk about this. To get
lay all the cards on the table and get it all out there.
Suck it up Bella you can do this, I gave myself a pep talk.
"What is it Kitten?" he asked
I swallowed the lump in my throat. "I want you to tell me about that
He was quiet for a moment. He studied my face, searching for something.
He was so tired, and he looked so stressed. I should have kept my
mouth shut and let him get some sleep.
"Forget it. You should get to bed," I said, pulling away from him but
he beat me to it.
He stood up and went to the sitting area by the window. He sat on the sofa.
I sat perfectly still waiting to see what he was going to do next. I
didn't know if he was going to talk or not.
"We didn't know about the kids Bella, we didn't fucking know."
"It's okay Edward."
"NO! Shut up and let me say this, all of it, I need to get it all out."
He rested his elbows on his knees and with one hand, rubbed his
fingers over his forehead.
"We didn't care. When I was asked to do the job, I didn't care." He said.
I have to admit hearing him say that, it hurt.
"Ronnie wanted to become a made guy and I…I wanted it so I could get
closer to Dimitri."
"Get close how? He's your grandfather?" I asked.
Edward looked at me sternly. I had disobeyed him. I had to admit, that
look made the hairs on the back of my neck stand.
"I only had access to him at Sunday dinner, or when he wanted. I needed
to get into his inner circle. I had something else planned for him. I
was sure he wouldn't be found guilty. He had a fucking good lawyer."
"But what Swan had on him…Not even the best lawyer could have saved him."
"So who ordered the hit?" I asked.
"Caius, but the order came from Dimitri first. Fuck, Kitten! I
shouldn't be telling you this shit." He jumped up on the sofa and
started to pace the room.
"Please, I want to know, I have a right to know don't you think?" He
could not just leave it there. I had every right to know about this.
This was my life, my family that was destroyed and I want to know why.
"It was simple Bella, they wanted revenge for what your father did, and
we wanted to be made. It would have been an easy task." He shrugged.
His indifference as he spoke now really pissed me off, but lashing
out at him was not going to help. Right now I need to stay
calm and keep my mouth shut.
"You were all in witness protection, did you know that?" He asked.
I shook my head. I didn't know anything. I was too little to really
question anything. Mom always told me that dad's job was to work away
from home, and what a stupid child I was for never asking what it was
he was doing, but I do remember that when dad came back, that was when we
moved from Georgia to Washington and that is when things went downhill
with mom and dad.
I remember they were always arguing, always yelling at each other and
mom would always threaten to leave dad, but in the end she always
"No, you were probably too young to remember much."
"I was ten Edward, I remember plenty, but to me it just another move.
They never made us feel as if we were in hiding. They never spoke
about it." I said. "How did you or Caius know where we were?"
Was that not the point of witness protection, to protect the witness?
How did they find us?
"The only secret the FBI managed to keep about your family was what
happened to you after…"
"After you left me in the middle of the street," I said.
He blew out a deep breath.
"Two bombs killed your family Isabella, that's all it took," he said.
He continued to pace the floor ever so slowly. Physically he was here
but mentally…mentally he was reliving that night.
"I didn't know he had children. If…if we would have known, fuck
kitten. If we would have known there would have been no fucking way,
no fucking way we would have done it."
He was becoming angrier and angrier with each word he spoke.
"That motherfucker knew. I asked him. Ronnie asked and…he knew. Caius
didn't care kids or no kids." He shook his head.
"Edward, please sit down." I said.
I wanted to do something to calm him down. His face was red. His hands
were balled up into fists and there was a bulging vein on the side of
his neck. I was worried about him. He looked like he was about to have
a heart attack, however he always got worked up whenever he spoke of
Caius or Dimitri.
He was trying to calm himself down. His eyes were closed and he was
taking deep breaths. He came back, and sat back next to me. I took his hand
in mine and rubbed circles on the back like he would do to me.
"Are you okay?" I asked.
"Shouldn't I be asking you that? We shouldn't be talking about this
now kitten. I'm supposed to make sure you're not stressed, not be the
one causing it." He bought our joined hands to his lips and kissed the
back of mine.
"I'm not stressed. Sad... yes, but not stressed," I said.
"I am so sorry."
"Don't apologize. Finish what you were saying."
"We were young and a nobody. We each had our own reasons for wanting
to complete the…task."
He shifted a little on the bed until he was sitting with his back resting
against the headboard.
"No one knew where we were. We drove all the way from Chicago to Forks,
switching cars multiple times. When we arrived, we waited out the
house. We watched, but we didn't see anyone other than your father
exit. So when night came, we did what we had to do….It was a little
My stomach was in knots. I didn't want to hear what he was
about to say and yet I wanted to hear it all. Would it make a
difference at all?
"Ronnie left the car and I stayed to watch. It was a pretty quiet town,
but you never know what could jump out and surprise you. He put a
device under each vehicle and activated them. They were triggered by
the engine so the moment it turned on the timer began."
So Ronnie was the one who had placed the explosives.
"Then we waited. It didn't take long. Your mom came out angry and
yelling at your father. She climbed in one of the cars and took off.
Your brother came out after your father. He wanted your father to go
after her and stop her, but he refused."
"Yeah, that sounds like Rylie." I chuckled.
He was always the peacekeeper. He couldn't stand it when they fought.
Whenever they did, he would take me in his room and turn the music up
loud to block out the screams. I miss him so much.
"He went back inside and your father chased after him. Two seconds later
he was back out and behind the wheel, your father jumped in with him."
He looked up at the ceiling. His eyes were red and watery.
"Not long after that, we heard two explosions."
He let the tears fall.
"We were shocked at what had just happened. But we still had a job to do.
Your father had a laptop that we needed to get. I never looked on it
and to this day I don't what was on it, but he had some incriminating
evidence against all of them, even my father."
Carlisle, Dr Carlisle? I thought he was a good one, the one that
didn't want any part of the family business. I guess appearances can
"We got what we came for and then…we heard a little voice calling for
her mommy." He sobbed.
I felt my own tears slid down. I may have been young, but I remember
that night as well.
"We didn't know what to do with you, but we couldn't have left you
there in a burning house."
"Why didn't you kill me then? It would have been so much easier," I said.
He looked at me as if I had sprouted another head.
"Killing you was not an option Kitten, never. I had to make sure you
got out of there safe."
"You left me there in the middle of the street."
"We knew the police were coming. I knew they would find you."
"Why, why didn't you take me with you?"
"What were we supposed to do with you Isabella?"
"Were you not afraid I would tell them what I saw?"
"What did you tell them?"
"I didn't tell them anything. I told them I heard loud noises and a
bang. I was scared when I couldn't find anyone so I ran down stairs
and the door was open so I ran outside. I told them I was afraid of
the dark and the whole house was dark. I knew they didn't believe me."
I chuckled. I remember one detective told me that if I don't tell him
the truth I was going to go to jail.
"Why did you lie Kitten?"
I shrugged. "I don't know. I honestly don't know. I could have told
them everything, and they probably would have connected it all back to
your family. But I just couldn't."
It's hard to explain what was going on in my ten year old head. I was
scared out of my mind. They didn't tell that my parents were dead
until a few days after. I didn't really understand what had happened
back then. All I knew was, they didn't hurt me so they were not bad
people. Stupid me.
"I am so sorry. NO, no, sorry is not good enough, it will never be good
enough. No apology ever will."
"There is no point crying over spilt milk Edward."
"No, it happened. We can't change what we did. I won't tell you that
I'm okay and that everything is okay because it's not, and to be honest I
don't know if it will ever be."
Thought if we talked about this, it would lessen the pain, make me
understand more. I understand why he did what he did. He didn't have a
choice, he never really did where Dimitri was involved. But this
doesn't lessen the pain in fact it hurts more now than it did before,
because now I feel his pain and anguish too.
"You and me Edward, we shouldn't have ever met, we shouldn't be
together or married or having a baby…But we here we are and I can't
help thinking that this has all happened for a reason."
"And what fucking reason could that be? There is no reason good enough
on this earth for this much pain," he cried.
I whipped at his tears with my thumb. He grabbed my hand and held it
to his face.
"You and I, maybe we're supposed to help each other. Let's face it
Edward, if it wasn't you it would have been someone else who would have
killed my family and maybe those people would have killed me too. Our
paths crossed again for a reason. Maybe it's God's little joke, or
maybe we are just meant to be, I don't know. But I am so sick of being
angry all the time. I've tried to hate you, and believe me I do."
He sighed and held my hand a little tighter.
"But I love you more. It's a constant battle I have with myself, but in
the end love wins over hate."
He didn't give any warning as his lips came crashing down on mine. His
kiss was urgent, desperate and full of need.
"I love you kitten, so fucking much," he whispered in between kisses.
"Please don't leave, no matter what please don't go," he begged.
"I can't promise you anything," I said. I needed time away that was
for sure. I needed to think about everything and come to terms with it
all. No matter what I've told Edward, the pain inside won't go away
It was not the answer he was hoping for, but he continued his assault,
trailing kisses down my neck. One hand slid under my shirt and his
warm hand was on my back trailing up and down it made me shiver. I had
missed his touch so much.
He pulled my shirt over my head. I was there naked from the waist up.
I pulled the sheets up around me. I was conscious of the way I looked
now. He pulled the sheets away from me.
"Didn't I tell you to never hide from me?" He said.
"I look like..." He didn't let me finish.
"You look beautiful, perfect."
I bit the inside of my cheek. He was telling the truth. The way he was
looking at me now, I had no doubt about that.
I did as I was told.
He hooked his fingers into the waistband of my pants and pulled them
down my legs. I wasn't wearing any underwear. I didn't need to see his
face, but I knew he had a smirk on it.
He rubbed the inside of my thighs and gently pushed them apart.
"Fuck me, I've missed this," he said.
I felt him push one finger in while his thumb pressed on my clit
rubbing circles. I grabbed a fist full of the sheets. Why did I hold
on this for so long when I know how good it is with him?
He removed his thumb and replaced it with his tongue swirling and
twirling it around as his finger pumped in and out and in and out. I
was so close to falling over the edge, but every time I was he would
pull back only to do it again and stop right before I went over.
It was so frustrating I wanted to scream.
"Please," I begged him. I didn't know how much more I could take of
"The only way you will cum is with me inside you," he said.
I pushed him away as he chuckled. He stood up and removed his sleep
pants. I licked my lips when his cock sprung free form it's
confinement. He was enjoying my current state that he had left me in.
He stood there stroking himself as he watched me with hungry eyes.
"Edward, fuck me already." I demanded.
"Tsk, tsk, such a naughty girl you are with that mouth," he said.
"I can do even naughtier things with my mouth."
"Oh, you are asking for a fucking spanking," he growled.
"Mr. Cullen are you going to fuck me or not?"
"Don't push your luck Kitten."
"You know there is a whole room downstairs full of fucking things I
could use. I'm sure I could find the perfect one to get me off," I
said. I surprised myself with the words that were coming out of my
mouth. I blame it on the hormones.
He chuckled without humor.
"Do it and I will burn this place down," he said as he made his way
back to me on the center of the bed.
He spread my legs and settled himself in between.
"This is what you want?" He asked.
He entered me with only half of his cock and then drew back out each time driving me
more and more crazy.
"You want me to fuck you?"
I nodded and hummed my response since I was unable to form words anymore.
"You want me to make you cum?"
Why is he talking so fucking much?
"YES!" I practically yelled out.
It worked though. He pushed all the way as we both let out a staggered
moan. It had been too long, way too long.
"Fuck kitten," he groaned.
"Please, please, please." I begged.
He bought a hand in between us and rubbed my clit with a finger as he
picked up his pace. This was it, I was so close and God help him if he
"Come on Kitten," he said. "Cum all over me."
That was it that was my undoing. I closed my eyes and rode it out, as
wave after wave of pure pleasure hit me. It didn't take him long to
follow, and soon we were both lying there spent with a smile on our
"Fuck," he said, slightly out of breath.
"Yeah," I said.
I scooted closer to him and laid my head down on his chest. He wrapped
his hand around my back and the other held my hand. This was how we
Things were not perfect between us, but let's be honest they never
again will be. We have to learn how to move on from all of this and
deal with the hand life has thrown at us.
I was at After Dark. Aro had called twenty minutes ago to say that Tanya and
Jane were on the move, and appeared to be heading here.
I was ready for them and whatever the fuck they were up to.
Them showing up however, could not come at a worse time. We were
packed, more so than usual. I had no idea when so many people had
become interested in such a lifestyle or if they just simply walked in
off the street. Bella told me that they must all be curious, something
about some woman releasing some book or some crap like that. Either
way I wasn't complaining, business was business.
I had Aro on speaker informing me of their every move.
"They're here, they're at the door, and they made it inside."
I shut the phone with him and took out the two-way radio.
Ronnie had informed security about what was going down, and they had
been instructed to report me their every move once inside.
Ronnie was at the bar. I know Tanya will recognize him, she has seen
him here before and so has Jane.
"Boss they're talking with Ronnie. Now they have all gone through the
backdoor. They're coming your way. Want us to come in?"
"No, I got from here." I said.
My office door burst open. Jane with a pissed off expression was first
through the door, followed by Tanya and Ronnie. He closed the door
"What the fuck do you want?" I spat.
"I have present for you Eddie," Jane said.