So this is based on Cobra Starship's "I Kissed a Boy" (which I do not own). If you listen to the song it's from England's perspective. This is what happens when you listen to songs while thinking about Punk!England.

Urgh. This was also my first time writing anything resembling a make-out scene sooo... heh... Forgive me. Also note now that this is USUK so obviously it's yaoi. (Though nothing bad.)

*I do not own Hetalia*

(Note- Mei is Taiwan)

Alfred shot the young lady in front of him a winning smile and struck a pose again. The petite Asian woman giggled behind her hand.

Alfred grinned and leaned an arm on the bar beside him. He seriously needed to thank Kiku for hooking him up after he got home. "Sure I can't buy you anything?" He asked.

"No, Alfred-kun." She smiled pleasantly. "I don't really drink much. I find it clouds the mind a bit too much for my liking. You never know what you'll do or say while intoxicated."

"You sure it has nothing to do with the all the stuff you accidentally told Kiku and Toris last time we all went out, Mei?" Alfred laughed as the usually calm woman in front of him blushed furiously and waved her hands in an adorably frantic way.

"Would you stop with it already okay? It's not that odd from where I come from..." She covered her face with her hands. (More like tried her best to disappear.) "It's... Shut up..." She mumbled finally into her sleeves. "Besides Kiku's worse."

Alfred chuckled again. He loved taunting the young Taiwanese girl. Yup, definitely needed to thank Kiku, especially after Kiku had complained about Alfred hitting on his cousin.

"It's okay. Kiku probably was the one to corrupt you anyway." He took another sip of his drink and smiled. "I share a room with him back at the dorms remember?" He gave a mock shudder. "The things I've seen." He said as he threw a hand to his face, acting faint.

Mei finally looked up and gave him a reluctant smile again. "I'm not as bad as Kiku I swear."

Alfred quirked a brow. "You sure, because I mean some of the crap you said was pretty-"

Mei laughed it off this time as she smacked Alfred playfully. "Maybe you should have a talk with Elizabeta when you get home. Seriously, you're making fun of me but your friends are much weirder!"

Alfred grimaced. "Well Kiku, Elizabeta and Francis aside my friends are just fine thank you."

"Reaally?" She smirked. "They're all so odd, Alfred. I mean I can speak for my cousin myself but your little University has the oddest cast I've ever seen."

Alfred pouted at this, receiving the expected sigh from Mei. He couldn't keep it up and quickly broke into a smile again. She really was adorable. Her petite frame was perched on a bar stool, her legs primly crossed at the ankle. She wore a long-sleeved pink blouse and a black pencil skirt. She even had a real lotus flower tucked behind her ear, holding some of her long black hair back.

Her eyes were a deep chocolate brown that sparkled as she giggled quietly again. (And not in a bad way, she was in no way stuck up or rude, she was simply shy in a way that was like, totally adorable.)

"Okay maybe my friends are weird." He said. "Am I?" At this Alfred shot her a puppy-dog look.

She looked at him for not even a split second before replying, "Yes." in a surprisingly serious tone. Alfred baulked and her eyes immediately crinkled in amusement. "But in a good way." She finished.

Alfred looked up from the pouting look he had been giving the floor to look at Mei again. "Does that mean the hero gets an A++ for effort?" He gave her a thumbs up as he turned up the charm until he practically sparkled.

Mei put on a evil grin and replied, "Maybe... if you go buy me a drink. A non-alcoholic one; we want to focus on how you're weird, not on what I might say to prove I'm weird." She pointed over to the other side of the club. "They were selling smoothies over there, you should get me one."

Alfred winked at her as he put his drink down and left as Mei called out, "Even your clubs are weird here in America aren't they? Really, smoothies?"

Alfred grinned dumbly as he walked over to the bar. He stopped short as he bumped into someone.

"Ah, sorry!" He said as he stumbled back. The man looked up at him with piercing red eyes that gave Alfred a fright. His silver hair reflected the colors that were bouncing around in the air, but the oil-like patterns were interrupted by a bright splotch of yellow planted at a slight tilt on the man's head. Alfred squinted at the spot in confusion. He hadn't had that much to drink had he? He recognized that he might have been a little tipsy, but his thought processes had seemed fine and he'd walked perfectly straight and stably over until he had bumped into the man who appeared to be an albino. However, the fact that he was seeing bright yellow birds in the middle of a city club made him really reconsider how much he had drank. It had only been two shots right?

"No problem pal." The man grinned as he slapped Alfred on the back. "It happens."

Alfred then decided that maybe this man was more drunk than him, even if he was seeing questionable things. The albino then wobbled off and promptly fell onto a brunette man that Alfred assumed was his friend. "Toni! When you'd get here?" He heard the man slur before he shrugged and turned back to get the smoothies.

He purchased a strawberry smoothie before making his way back to Mei. His thoughts trailed off about how he could never believe how lucky he got sometimes. He always seemed to go on dates with the nicest, prettiest, most amazing girls around. Sure maybe the past few hadn't ended up as anything, but the 'break-ups' hadn't been terrible at all either. After all, he had been agreement with the splits.

He frowned as he reached the half-way point back to his seat, seeing no albino to bump into this time. It wasn't as if he hated any of the girls or anything, (except that Natalia chick, she had been terrifying) it just always seemed like their relationships hadn't been going anywhere. Believe it or not (and you better believe it) Alfred was very popular with the ladies. He won most girls over with his pretty smile and sweet personality, but in the end he always just seemed to be friend-zoned. (Even if he accepted and agreed with it, Alfred wondered if he was just really bad at relationships... No, never, he was awesome.) In fact he still met up with his past three girlfriends for various club activities and would joke around with them like nothing happened. Even though he was happy with just being friends, he worried briefly why his relationships with girls always failed.

He finally reached the bar and caught Mei's gaze from down the counter. Well things were going well enough with Mei so far, so he decided to disregard the troublesome thoughts. She gave him a smile as he began moving his way down the long distance to the other end of the bar.

He stopped as he felt someone tap on his shoulder. He wondered who it could be briefly, it must have been someone he didn't know as he knew his friends hadn't been planing on coming tonight, before turning- and suddenly finding his face awfully close to someone else.

He started to back away and apologize before suddenly a hand grabbed a hold of his collar and yanked him down.

Alfred's eyes widened in astonishment as his face collided with the stranger's. He stiffened. What? His mind muddled through the cloud that had immediately formed over it.

Before he knew it, the man (because it was definitely a man) was full on making out with him, pushing him up against the bar behind him while they locked lips. One of his hands grasping the fabric collar of Alfred's shirt and another resting on the bar beside Alfred. Alfred was too shocked to do anything other than stand there.

Dude push him off. The sane part of his brain told him, however the rest of it seemed to be way too focused on the man who was pressed up against him and refused to acknowledge the thought. Obviously the man had mistaken him for someone else, if Alfred didn't do something then-

Alfred's train of thought immediately shattered into a million pieces as the man bit at his lower lip. He felt his brain short-circuit and any attempts to make sense of the situation melted away. He tried again to force a coherent thought to form. He should do something- do... do what again?

He felt the man's tongue trail slowly along the corner of his mouth, almost teasingly. It was at that point that he was officially broken. His brain was beyond even forming words at this point, and he had a terrible feeling that he if this kept up for much longer he would most definitely melt into a puddle at this man's feet. He wasn't even sure how much time had passed, it must've been only a few seconds but he wasn't sure, the world had seemed to dim around him.

He was relieved beyond all reason when the man pulled back and he was able to grasp frantically at the ends of his quickly retreating sanity. The man stepped back slightly, removing his hand from where it had been holding the fabric of Alfred's (now wrinkled) collar. His emerald eyes (damn they were a shocking shade of green) glinted almost evilly at Alfred as he licked his lips.

Well say something dude! His mind seemingly wailed at him. Finally, the wires in his brain seemed to spark and fuse back together. "Wha- What the hell dude!?" He finally choked out, regaining control of his voice.

The man only smirked. "Sorry about that chap." He replied in a crisp English accent. His gaze lingered on Alfred only a moment longer before his eyes darted to the stares that they had been receiving, many from gaping young women. His eyelids lowered into a leer and his grin grew wider, taking in the audience they had apparently gathered.

Alfred just stared aghast as the man started walking away, trailing a hand (the same one that had been resting against the counter on the opposite side of Alfred) across Alfred's arm before shooting one last smirk over his shoulder at him. Alfred finally gained control over his limbs as he prepared to storm after the man and demand an explanation. He was only able to take a single step before his path was blocked by none other than the albino from earlier.

"Hey move it!" Alfred fumed but the man just shifted to continue to block Alfred's path as he tried to move around him.

"Sorry dude." He snickered, seeming a lot less drunk than Alfred had seen him last. "But you look like you're going to sock one to my pal, and I can't let that happen." Alfred glared at the man, resigning himself to looking over the man's shoulder instead. He then saw that the blond-haired green-eyed man had walked over to Mei.

Alfred paled as he realized Mei had seen the whole spectacle, it was obvious from the way she hid her astonished face behind a hand. And to top it off, the British man was talking to her, bowing slightly and holding out a hand. Alfred nearly blew a fuse when he saw him place a kiss on her hand as Mei giggled.

"What the-" He turned to question the albino but found only a knowing smirk on his face and got a snicker. Alfred had balled his hands at his side and sent all his rage at the pale man with a simple look.

"Maybe you should calm down dude." The man began, face becoming passive- grin leaving- as he raised an eyebrow. "He's just a bit-" but Alfred was beyond calm now. He turned and stomped out the door, ignoring the obvious stares he could feel on his back. He heard a faint "dude wait!" behind him as the albino tried to call him back, but he was utterly done. He let out a stream of curses as he realized his face was growing red. He burst out the door and reasoned he could pass the blame of it on the heat of the club. (After all it was not because he was blushing.)

He started storming down the street towards home and realized he was still holding the strawberry smoothie in his left hand. He grimaced and dropped it in the nearest trash can before walking stiffly to the dorms. Stupid smoothie. He thought sourly.

He had marched halfway back to the dorms before his head finally cleared a bit. He stopped and rubbed at the back of his head in embarrassment. He had over-reacted (even if he had totally had the right to) and was feeling childish now. He winced as he realized he'd ditched Mei in the middle of their date, even leaving her with the stupid British man. He reached into his back pocket and hit 3 on speed-dial. He leaned back on a nearby wall and waited as it rang.

"Alfred?" A voice answered back. "What is it?" Alfred made a face at the heavily implied 'Do you know what time it is? Some of us have classes tomorrow even if you don't' that only close friends would be able to pick out of the restrained, polite tone the reserved man used.

"Hey, could you give Mei a text for me?" He asked, chuckling nervously, "I kind of-"

"I have already heard Alfred." The voice cut him off. "Mei actually texted me telling me you left."

"Oh... she did..." Alfred mumbled. Shuffling his feet, she stared pointedly at the ground. Man he was terrible wasn't he, leaving a nice girl like Mei in the middle of their 'date'.

"Yes, but she didn't seem mad." The man sighed finally. Alfred could hear a faint rustling and the distinct click of a lamp flicking on. "She seemed more concerned about you."

"Oh really?" Alfred asked. He was relieved, as he had been really worried that Mei would hate him now. Especially after that... show... and his ditching of her afterwards.

"Yes, really." The man sighed. "Are you coming home Alfred?" Alfred blinked, realizing he had unconsciously already started walking back to the dorms.

"Uh, yeah. Thanks Kiku." Alfred smiled. "What's up anyway?"

There was a faint groan on the other side of the line. "Alfred it is the middle of the night, I have a test tomorrow, and you are interrupting my sleep. If you want to talk to me as you walk home you can talk about why you left my cousin alone. She can take care of her self, she is a black-belt after all, but it was rather rude."

Alfred had no reply to that. He couldn't tell Kiku the real reason, that would be embarrassing. (Not that he cared. He was totally not worked up about it at all. There was no reason to be worked up. It's not like he was totally pissed at himself for it. Yup. He didn't care at all.) "Um..." He tittered for a minute, avoiding answering.

This grabbed the Japanese man's attention as he sat up in his bed. He had woken up to his phone blaring "American Idiot". (It was remnant of a bet Alfred and him had made a while ago. Alfred had won and forced Kiku to change his ring-tone for Alfred to something specifically American related, Kiku had picked said song just to spite Alfred. The man really was devious sometimes.) It was easy to say Kiku had not been amused when reading the time on the clock, 12:45 am, and picking up the phone. His sleep had just been interrupted by a text from Mei earlier, and Kiku was annoyed to say the least. (Or most, depending on how well you could read Kiku's expressions.)

Kiku was intrigued now. Nothing made Alfred F. Jones stutter. Unlike himself, Alfred was never afraid to say loud, and often embarrassing, things in public and laugh it off equally as loudly. In fact, whenever Alfred was embarrassed, which was rare to say the least, he just laughed at the offender, leaving Kiku, who was always embarrassed, face-palming and taking the majority (if not all) the shame for Alfred. Really, the things that man did shocked him sometimes.

"Is something wrong Alfred?" Kiku asked, tilting his head back. Kiku was very good at reading expressions and tones, unlike Alfred who couldn't even seem to read the atmosphere, and he already knew the answer. He just wanted to see how Alfred would react.

The reaction was spectacular. "What? No! No, I'm fine! Nothing wrong at all!" Alfred yelped. Kiku was astonished. He thought back to the text Mei had sent him. What had it said exactly again? He had pretty much stopped reading it after the "Alfred left", and had texted a brief "Sorry" before he had flopped face-down back into his blankets. He strained his mind, thinking. It had said something about her being concerned and... amused had it said? He couldn't quite remember.

"Alfred if you want to tell me something..." He trailed off, slyly egging the American on. He was quite good at being innocently devious.

"I said it was nothing!" Alfred cried. At this point he was in front of the dorms but had stopped short. Not wanting to face Kiku.

"... Alfred..." Kiku pushed.

"GOODBYE." Alfred snapped as he hit the 'End Call' button and fumed for a bit. It didn't help that apparently his mind was still a treacherous asshole, replaying the scene from the bar over and over despite Alfred's protests. He cursed himself, why the hell was he still so focused on it? And why the hell had he done nothing to protest it at the time. It must have been a mix of the alcohol and the shock, that was it.

He frowned as he pushed open the gates to the dorms and walked slowly up to his room he shared with Kiku. He was still scowling as he walked down the hallway. And another thing. He thought. It had been a dude. Not that Alfred was homophobic or anything, (he had to deal with Francis hitting on guys all the time, but that was more an 'anything that moves' kind of situation anyway, so it didn't really count) but he was straight after all, and some other dude had just up and kissed him... more like assaulted him actually.

His mind, traitorous asshole it was, flickered briefly to the worries he had had earlier that same night. Why did he always have such bad luck with girlfriends? What if-

NOPE. Alfred quickly decapitated that train of thought. It was at that point he had reached the door and slammed it open, receiving a glare from Kiku in the process. He immediately chuckled nervously and grinned apologetically as he softly closed the door behind him. Don't need to take the anger out on the room. He thought.

"Sorry bro." He said before grabbing spare clothes and running off to the bathroom before Kiku could question him. The Japanese man just sighed before face-planting back into the sheets of his bed.

He heard, a few minutes later, when Alfred came back. He laid down and flicked off the lights leaving the room in beautiful darkness once again. Kiku pondered briefly if he should ask Alfred about what had happened again, but decided against it.

It was too late to deal with Alfred anyway, and he had a test in... he glanced at the clock that brightly read 1:00. Six hours. Kiku then promptly decided to yell at Alfred later as he drifted off to sleep.

So... I'll probably continue this, just so I can write flustered, embarrassed Alfred. (Seeing as my other Al is the exact opposite.) Plus... I mean come-on... Punk!England. And silly Al, you can't escape the yaoi no matter how "straight" you are.

Comments much loved! Please let me know what you think.