Well, this is the last chapter of this story. I have enjoyed writing and hope you have enjoyed reading it. Thanks so much to everyone that followed, faved and reviewed!
The Doctor could feel himself waking up and though he tried to force himself back to sleep he knew that he was waking up for good. Despite that, he kept his eyes closed and soaked in the feelings around him. He could hear the gentle, comforting hum of the TARDIS around him and could feel her welcome press into his mind. Upon entering the ship he had given her the mental equivalent of dropping on his knees and begging for forgiveness and thanking her for what she had done. She was one hundred percent right in thinking that he wouldn't have done what he needed to do without a proper nudge and she was the only one that could have given him the needed nudge to bond with Rose. And he was so thankful for it; he had felt her comforting touch upon his mind as soon as the thoughts were from his head. She was not one to hold a grudge.
The Doctor basked in the joy of sleeping in his own bed, surrounded by the mental touch of the TARDIS for several minutes before he opened his eyes and reached out for Rose. He was surprised when he found the spot beside him empty. He reached out; the bed was still warm, her scent still in the air and he knew she couldn't have been gone for long. He lay there, thoughts of Rose making him smile, waiting for her to come back to bed. When she didn't come back after several minuets he figured she hadn't simply run to the bathroom and got out of bed to find her. The Doctor felt the TARDIS leading him a short distance, one that should not have surprised him but it did. He found himself standing in front of the cloaked door of their son's nursery; his throat tightened even looking at the door and he instinctively knew that he would find Rose behind it. It should have been cloaked and Rose shouldn't have been able to see it; but now that her mind was more tuned like his, he supposed that there were plenty of surprises to what she could and couldn't do now. He cringed as he put his hand on the doorknob, anticipating the sadness that came with seeing the nursery and wondering what Rose would say to the fact that he had hidden it from her.
When the Doctor came into the room, he saw Rose sitting in the rocker, turned slightly toward the changing window. The sight took his breath away; Rose was always beautiful whether she was fully dressed and done up or completely unclothed. But how she looked right now, wearing nothing but her knickers and one of his t-shirts swallowing her small frame, completely free of any trace of makeup, her rumpled golden hair falling onto her shoulders, was one of his favorites. The sight of the window, the burnt orange sky glinting off the silver trees, only made the sight more amazing.
"Hello, Doctor" Rose said, her voice quiet as she continued to stare out the window. The Doctor smiled; he supposed that it wouldn't be so ease to sneak up on her anymore. The Doctor walked over to the window and sat down on the seat, facing Rose. He glanced at the window before turning back to Rose.
"Nice choice" he said, smiling at her.
Rose looked sad; he could sense a mix of sadness and a strange bit of happiness coming from her. She stared at the window before her eyes came to fall on him. "The TARDIS picked it for me…it does seem to calm me….for some reason" she said. She tucked her legs underneath herself and crossed her arms, rubbing them together nervously.
"Overwhelmed?" The Doctor asked. He could tell she was anxious; no doubt the changes that Rose was experiencing were overwhelming. The Doctor was overjoyed, thrilled that Rose was becoming more like himself; it made their connection to each other even stronger. But he could only image how overpowering it could be to someone that wasn't used to it. The Doctor was proud of how well she had been handling it so far.
Rose gave him a half smile as she hugged her arms to herself, his large shirt falling slightly off her shoulder. "Yeah….a bit I suppose" she admitted. "It is a bit of a change. Don't you ever get tired of your mind behaving like a clock?"
The Doctor laughed. "I actually find it quite comforting actually…you'll get used to it" he said. Rose looked down at her lap and then looked up at his eyes, smiling.
"There seems to be a lot to 'get used to'" she said thoughtfully.
"Do wish you weren't changing?" The Doctor asked. He wanted to know but he desperately hoped that Rose said no. He could understand if she didn't want this; it was a big change thrust on her without her consent. There wasn't anything that he could do to reverse the change but he didn't want her to resent this.
Rose's face changed in surprise. "Oh…..no" she said. "Not at all. I don't regret it all. I'm…..I'm glad it happened. Just a big change."
"Oh…..good" The Doctor said, giving her a smile. There was a long uncomfortable pause in the conversation before Rose spoke.
"Doctor…..why did you hide this place?" she asked, giving him one of her understanding looks that always made him want to talk even when he shouldn't. The Doctor looked down at his lap but he knew that even doing so he couldn't avoid the look.
"I was going to close it…..I meant to" he said, staring down at his pyjama pants to avoid having to look at her. It was getting easier to talk to Rose but opening up was still completely against anything he was used to. It was going to take a long time before it wouldn't seem at least a little strange to him. "I just…..couldn't yet. I cloaked it because I didn't want you to have to see it every day and be reminded by it. But I…just couldn't let go yet"
The Doctor looked up finally to find Rose giving him a sympathetic look, one that made this harder. "Doctor….." she started sadly.
"No…..really, it's alright" The Doctor said quickly, afraid she might comfort him and he didn't think he could manage if she did.
Despite his effort to divert attention away from his feelings, Rose didn't go along with it. Rose stood up from the chair and walked over to him, standing in the place between his legs as she wrapped her arms around him tightly. He felt that instinctual need to pull away but his need for her for won out. He rested his head on her chest, a sigh running through him. "Doctor…..it's not alright" she said, her hands moving to his head, running along his hair. "I've been in your head…..and I know how you feel about losing our baby. It's alright, you know…..that you didn't close this room. It's okay to mourn…..you don't need to hide it from me because I'm mourning him too."
The Doctor left his face in the warmness of Rose's chest, enjoying the feel of her hands on his head for a while before he looked up at her. "You don't think I should close it?" he asked. He knew deep down that he shouldn't keep the room open, the way it was when they thought their son would inhabit it. It would just hurt him. But hearing Rose tell him to close it would mean more than his own head.
"It hurts you to be in here" Rose said, running her fingers along his ear, earning a shiver to run through him. Damn these big, sensitive ears…..He thought, forcing himself not to get too lost in the motion. "It brings up unpleasant memories. Maybe you should close it…but…..I hope one day there might be another baby to call it home." The Doctor looked at her in surprise and she grinned at him, "I hope we have another baby to put in here. But even if we do, I think we should remodel it. Make it for that little one"
The Doctor looked at Rose, smiling and full of promise and hope; he loved her so much. The TARDIS had given him exactly the gift he needed with her. He rubbed her stomach lovingly, one that was now empty but he hoped would one day hold his child again. "You really think we might have another little one?" he asked hopefully.
Rose laughed. "At the rate you're going Doctor…your odds are good" she said slyly, her face turning red.
The Doctor felt his own cheeks redden into the ears that Rose was still stroking. "In my defense…..I do have centuries of self-control to make up for" he said with a smile.
"I didn't say I was complaining" Rose said, her tongue peeking out between her teeth. The Doctor could hardly resist that look; the list of things that he couldn't resist these days was growing steadily.
The Doctor leaned in and let himself kiss Rose deeply because he could and because she was beautiful and amazing and fantastic. He pulled back slightly and looked into her eyes. "Rose Tyler…..you're going to be the death of me "he said heavily.
But what a way to go….He thought as she leaned in and kissed him again.
3 years later…
The Doctor rubbed his eyes as he walked into the hallway toward the sound of the dual screaming. It was Rose's turn but she was soundly sleeping while he had been easily awoken from the sound between the walls; she pretended that she was just a heavy sleeper but the Doctor suspected that she was just using his attuned ears against him. That was okay; in this case he would gladly be taken advantage of.
The Doctor walked into the nursery, the soft pink and blue stars of the nightlight illuminating his path from the door to the crib. The sound of the screaming stopped briefly when he entered the room but then started up again in earnest. He smiled; fakers.
The Doctor walked over to the crib and looked down to his two angels who were screaming very unangelic like. Okay, who's the instigator this time? He asked mentally toward the two one-year olds lying in the crib.
Jack and Susan glanced at each other before looking up at him again.
The Doctor laughed; the blame game started early with the mini time lords. Sounds like you both are at fault here…..though someone has a dirty nappy I suspect. I'm willing to bet they started it, he thought.
Susan let out a babyish laugh, kicking her footed pyjama feet in the air. Jack's nappy's dirty…..he started crying so I started crying. Hi, daddy.
The Doctor's hearts positively melted at his daughter's smile. Hi, sweetie pie, he cooed, rubbing her blonde curls affectionately. You stay put while I change your brother's nappy, alright?
Ok, daddy. Susan said, sticking her thumb in her mouth.
Now, you, you little stinker. The Doctor said, looking at Jack. He looked up at the Doctor and laughed as he picked him up from the crib and carried him to the changing table. He unzipped his footie pyjamas, Jack's feet kicking wildly in the air as he took the pyjamas off.
Cold! Too cold! Jack called out, kicking his feet.
I have to take your jammies off to change you…if you cooperate with me we can get this done quick…no peeing on me this time! The Doctor said, giving Jack a serious look.
Jack looked up at the Doctor and giggled. The cold just makes it come out! He said with a laugh.
The Doctor laughed; it was just too cute to be annoyed at. Yeah, I know…..it's alright. The Doctor said. He proceeded to change his nappy as quickly as possible, managing to avoid getting peed on; mostly. Jack was smiling and biting on a closed bottle of baby power as the Doctor finished putting his pyjamas back on.
All better? The Doctor asked, picking Jack up and patting his bottom.
Much better, Jack agreed.
Good…..You know…..your timing is perfect. You always somehow manage to get your nappy all messy when it's my time to change you. What's that all about? The Doctor asked.
Jack laughed. You make funny faces when you do it…you make me laugh, he said, reaching out and grabbing the Doctor's nose.
Oi! Mummy doesn't make funny faces when she changes your stinky butt? The Doctor asked. Jack's hold on his nose was strong but he didn't stop him.
Jacked laughed more, his big brown eyes sparkling. No…she doesn't….plus she's got milk.
Hey! It's not my fault I don't have milk, the Doctor said with a laugh.
Jack tilted his head , grabbing the Doctor's ears. I like mummy a lot….
The Doctor hugged Jack to him. I like mummy a lot too.
Daddy! Susan called from the crib. The Doctor turned around and saw Susan holding onto the crib and jumping up and down, her small curls bouncing. He walked over to the crib, shifting Jack to one arm and scooping Susan up with the other. He spun around, causing them both to giggle; music to his ears.
There's no way you two are going to sleep now, is there? The Doctor asked, already knowing the answer. Jack and Susan slept about as well as he did; they had shared many a night together while Rose slept.
The Doctor carried Jack and Susan into the console room, sitting down on the jump seat. He propped one on each knee and began to sing a Gallifreyen nursery rhyme to them as they bounced happily on his knees.
The Doctor felt swelling happiness as he looked at his two children; miracles is what they were. He never thought he would ever have children again; in fact, a few years ago he would have said that children were the last thing that he had wanted. When Rose had become pregnant the first time nearly four years ago, it was not what he had wanted. They hadn't even been in a proper relationship then. But with all the events that had happened following the loss of their first child, a family with Rose was exactly what he had wanted. He'd been overjoyed when, a year after Rose's surprise transformation, she had told him she was pregnant. It had been even more amazing when they had found out she was carrying twins. They never even thought they would have one child, much less two. He had never believed in miracles before then.
"What are you three night owls doing out here?" Rose asked, entering the console room, a sleepy smile on her face. She smiled at the Doctor and their children as she walked over to the console and leaned on it, her hair wonderfully rumbled.
"Just singing some songs" the Doctor said, smiling down at Jack and Susan. "Since these two had some ideas that didn't consist of sleep."
Are you two keeping daddy up? Rose asked mentally with a grin.
Rose grinned at the exuberant greeting of her children. Jack squirmed in the Doctor's arms toward Rose and she picked him up, kissing his forehead. Let me guess…you woke up your sister? Rose asked, touching Jack on the nose.
Wasn't tired! Jack said with a laugh, bouncing.
Am I going to have to put you two in different cribs? Rose asked.
I don't mind mummy…Jack keeps me company, Susan said, settling against the Doctor's chest. The Doctor held her close and looked at Rose. He couldn't believe the turn that his life had taken; the fact that Rose so easily spoke through the minds of him and her children was simply amazing to him sometimes. It had been a long road getting used to it for Rose; having the knowledge of things that were and was and could be, being able to exchange thoughts and having an internal clock at all time. But finally she had adjusted and it only served to make them closer than they had ever been.
"What are you thinking so hard about?" Rose asked him, shifting Jack onto her hip.
The Doctor smiled. "How fantastic you are" he said, leaning in giving Rose a long, slow kiss.
Ew! Jack and Susan called out at the same time. The Doctor and Rose broke apart, laughing at the babies' reactions to their kiss.
Ah, come on…kisses are fun aren't they? Rose asked, giving Jack a kiss on his cheek.
Jack laughed. It's different when you kiss me, mummy! You kissing daddy is different!
Yeah, it's icky! Susan said, covering her eyes.
But you like daddy's kisses, The Doctor said, before giving Susan a kiss. Rose sat down on the jump seat beside the Doctor as the laughter died down. She pulled Jack close to her and looked over at the Doctor.
So…..what song are we singing? She asked, looking at her family in contentment.
The Doctor laughed. What song do you think? The only one they ever ask for.
The Doctor and Rose began to sing softly in Gallifreyen as Jack and Susan eventually began to drift off to sleep. The Doctor smiled as he listened to Rose sing the song of his people, their people. He leaned over and gave her a kiss on the cheek, stopping her song. Rose smiled, looking at him.
"No one's awake to say yucky now" the Doctor said with a grin.
Rose turned and gave him another long kiss. "Think we can sneak these two back to their room?" she asked giving him a knowing look.
The Doctor smiled. "We can sure try" he said. Rose and he tried to get off the seat but Jack and Susan immediately stirred and began to whimper. The Doctor looked over toward Rose, knowing their escape wouldn't be that easy. He grinned as a sudden idea came to him.
"Hey…..what do you say we pay Grandma Jackie a visit?" the Doctor asked.
Rose gave the Doctor a look of surprise. "You want to visit my mum? What's wrong with you?" she asked.
"Oh, I was just thinking she could do some babysitting for us" the Doctor said. "Maybe we could pay a little visit to Seshol" He gave her a wink that he hoped that she couldn't resist. "I did promise we'd go back one day"
Rose smiled, her tongue poking out between her teeth in the way that still undid him. "You want to go on holiday? I'm not going to pass up on that chance" she said.
The Doctor smiled as he shifted Susan to one arm, using the other to press buttons on the console. "Fantastic!" he said as the TARDIS whirled to life.