A Truly Evil Ficlet

By: Kimberly T. (email: kimbertow at yahoo dot com)

Note: Standard "I don't own 'em, not making a dime" disclaimers apply. And you can thank/blame Chris Dee, author of the fantastic 'Cat-Tales' series, for giving me the idea…


Spoiler was nearly dancing in place, and not in a happy way, as she stood behind Robin while he communicated with Oracle. Robin himself was squirming in his seat as he pleaded, "Please, can you have the JLA use the transporter to bring Batman back home? This is really urgent!"

"More urgent than putting a stop to Ra's Al Ghul's latest scheme?" the unseen Oracle responded.

"Uhhh… n-no…" Robin squirmed even more. "Listen, do you know any other superheroes who are real chemistry whizzes?"

"Mmm, let me work on that. If I can contact one, what's the problem you need solved?"

"Scarecrow's come up with another variety of fear toxin, and Spoiler and I were both exposed to it when we brought him down a few hours ago." Robin's voice anxiously rose up a notch or two as he finished, "The standard antitoxin isn't working…"

Oracle cursed briefly but violently over the airwaves. "I'll get an expert for you, post-haste! What are your symptoms?"

"Uhhhh…" Robin blushed beet red as he squirmed even more violently. Standing behind him, Spoiler groaned out loud, her face a mask of agonized misery.

"Symptoms, CBW!" Oracle barked. "I've got six varieties of fear toxins and the standard antitoxins on file for an expert to start working with, but knowing your symptoms may help in devising an antidote!"

"Oh, God…" Robin swallowed hard, glancing back at Spoiler. She squirmed even more violently, but nodded for him to tell Oracle. Robin turned back to the microphone and asked desperately, "Promise you won't tell this to anyone else? Especially not Nightwing?!"

"Cross my heart," Oracle swore. "Now, what did Scarecrow hit you with?"

Robin closed his eyes and swallowed hard again, then finally moaned, "He gave us both an uncontrollable fear… of toilets."

FINI