A/N: Hi, it's Elf again, just posting a little fun fanfic, don't worry about me~ RWBY belongs to Rooster Teeth, etc, etc, if I owned it Weiss would be a real Tsundere (wait she isn't one already?).
A/N 2: Warning, from here on out, OOCness and crack will ensue, as well as fourth-wall breaking of the highest caliber and insanity in general. Do NOT expect this to resemble the show. That is all.
A/N 3: Recaps of the fic are now available! Chapters 49-50, 60 and 81 are all recap chapters allowing new readers to catch up everything quickly if they want to skip right into the action.
Weiss Reacts to….White Rose Lemons
"….what the hell is this?!" Weiss screeched at the screen. She had decided to take a look at this ' ' Dustnet site or some other; she'd seen it on someone's computer, and having seen her fellow teammates perusing the site, she'd decided to take a look at it herself. But this….
The fanfiction she was currently reading was implying….things, between her and her team leader Ruby. By things, she meant intimate relations, and by intimate relations, she meant-
"Ugh! W-Who writes this crap?! W-what is that I-I'm….." The heiress stared in disbelief at the screen as she scrolled down further, unable to completely process what was going on. The story had started out tame enough, with her hooded team leader giving her longing glances- Weiss personally didn't 'swing' that way, by any stretch of the imagination, and if she did, not with Ruby, certainly- but it escalated incredibly quickly.
Weiss thought it was absolute nonsense. Surely nobody would write this kind of story about her, right? What kind of sick, disgusting- "W-what?! That c-can't be….." She stood up, blushing horribly, staring at the screen with a mixture of embarrassment and….was it desire? She shook the feeling out of her mind.
"No, Schnee, you don't think like that, even if you DID like her, she's too young for you, and she's too much of an idiot-" Weiss muttered to herself as she slowly shut off the computer and sat on her bunk. This was too much for her to simply let go. No…whoever wrote it needed punishment. Cold, hard, excruciating punishment.
She knew exactly who was at fault here.
Yang leaned on a tree, enjoying a well-earned snack from the canteen. She was proud of herself; she'd managed, for once, to make herself sit through yet another boring history lecture and now wouldn't have to do it for the rest of the week, as most of the staff were off doing some mission or other. Life would be good for now.
"YAAAANNNNGGG!" Or not. The brawler whirled around to see a very irritated Weiss, huffing. "Oh, hey. What's eati-"
"You know EXACTLY what's 'eating ' me, Xiao Long!" The white-haired girl poked Yang in the stomach. She looked surprised. "Whoa, whoa. What did I do?" "You know EXACTLY what it was. Take that stupid story off now!"
At this, the older girl was confused. "Wait, what story?" Weiss glared up at her, irritated. "You know what one- the one about me and Ruby-"
"Wait, someone wrote a story about you two? What's it about?"
"I- Not important! What's important is that you take it down this instant!"
The brawler shrugged. "I don't even know what it is, how do I take it down?" The heiress harrumphed and dragged- or at least, tried to drag- Yang along.
To bystanders, it appeared more like Weiss clinging on to the older girl's arm, and the older girl looking utterly confused by whatever was going on. Eventually, Yang budged, much to Weiss' relief. "Now come on, explain this!"
Ten minutes later….
Yang sat in the chair, embarrassed and confused. "S-So someone wrote this…" Weiss looked impatient. "About Ruby and myself, yes."
"….And you think I wrote it."
The blonde brawler sat there for a long moment, before bursting out into laughter. The heiress felt her head boil.
"What, exactly, is so funny about this?!"
"Oh, just the utter denial." Yang smirked.
"Oh, the fact that you find my little sister so utterly adorable~"
"W-what? T-that's not the point!"
"Oh, so you DO like her that way!"
Weiss looked even more annoyed. "NO! Look, Yang, I know you find this hilarious, but please, take this seriously!"
"Well, I'm going to have to. I mean, you want to go out with my sister, right?"
"….Xiao Long, I swear if you don't stop that, I will-" The heiress was interrupted by another burst of laughter from the older girl. She clenched her fists and held down her temper until Yang stopped laughing.
"Oh…oh my dust…that was just…plain hilarious. But, in all seriousness, I didn't write this."
"…." Weiss stared at her.
"I don't know who could have, either. I'll, uh, see you later, then?"
"….sure…" Weiss sighed as Yang walked out of the dorm, snickering.
"Note to self: embarrass the Ice Princess with her completely obvious crush on my sister."
Weiss lay back on her bed. Yang definitely hadn't written it, she didn't even know what it was about. That left two culprits; Blake and Ruby herself. The heiress decided to find their Faunus teammate first.
"Yes, of course! If Yang didn't write it, then Blake must've! She's probably going to try and get me back for that one time I ate her tuna sandwich by accident." Weiss sighed. "If this is her way of doing so….this is truly immature and immoral and…"
She blushed at the thought of the acts her character had been doing to Ruby. The heiress shook it off.
"I-I'd never do that to her! I-I'm not INTO girls like that!" She ran out of the room, hoping to find Blake.
"Wait, what?" Weiss looked at her.
"I…find it hilarious and stupid that someone wrote something like that about you two, but I didn't write it." Blake shrugged, adjusting her bow.
"But Yang said she didn't, and I don't think Ruby did."
"Well, it definitely wasn't me." She shrugged. Just as she did so, Nora poked her head in, whistling.
"Has anyone seen Ren? I need to talk to him!" Both the heiress and the bookworm shook their heads. Nora sighed.
"Yang said she wanted to talk to him about something. Oh well." With that, Nora walked off, her whistling echoing through the corridor. Blake and Weiss turned to each other the moment she left.
"Do you think-"
"No. Jaune is currently in the infirmary with no access to such devices after injuring himself in training, Pyrrha is there with him taking care of him, and Nora is….well, Nora. I don't believe Ren would do that either."
"So….I suppose it's just Ruby then, right?"
"Why are you so obsessed with finding who wrote the story?" Blake looked at Weiss quizzically.
"Wha- I'm not obsessed! I-I'm just concerned that someone might be w-writing…..s-stories like that about me and posting them on the Dustnet!" The heiress looked offended.
"…IS there something wrong with being supposedly in love with Ruby?"
"Then I don't see the issue." Blake shrugged. "I've got nothing else to say." She walked off.
"Wait! There…." Weiss sighed irritably.
Ruby was sitting on the roof above the dorm building, looking at the sky. The hooded girl had also been recently off an incredibly boring lecture and also wanted to simply take in some fresh air. She had sat there for about five minutes when-
"Ruby! Do you know about this?"
"Huh?" Ruby turned around to see an incredibly flustered Weiss, holding up her viewscreen with the offending fic.
"That is-j-just read it, you dunce!"
Ruby skimmed through it. Slowly, realization dawned in her mind, and she began to turn redder and redder the further down she looked.
"Is that-" "Yes."
"And am I-" Yes."
"And are you" Yes, yes, yes! Ruby, explain what the hell this is!" The heiress looked impatient. Ruby turned away, and at once, Weiss looked worried.
"H-hey, did I say something wrong? Bah, why am I so worried? You wrote this, didn't you?"
"….no?" Ruby's tone wasn't hurt, in fact, it sounded somewhat shy.
"What-oh, don't tell me he or she was right!"
"…..oh, no….it's just t-that I've never read something that….saucy." Ruby turned around, smirking. Weiss took a step back.
"….nothing!" Ruby picked up her scythe, that was by the floor where she sat and ran off. "Wait, come back here, you dunce! Wait!"
After many words were had with the rest of the team, Ruby agreed to never say that again, Yang agreed to never tease Weiss, after much prodding, and Weiss eventually forgot the whole affair.
Ruby, however, seemed to be giving Weiss strange looks now and again, but the heiress never paid them attention.
In a small alcove in the library, Ren looked up from his viewscreen, having uploaded the next chapter in "White Rose: True Love". The gunfighter smirked to himself, a rare show of emotion. He sighed to himself, looking around to make sure that Weiss wasn't around.
"She'll never know."
Nora popped her head in, smiling and cheery as ever. Ren immediately shut off his viewscreen.
"Oh, hey! Yang wanted to talk to you about something. Some story or other."
Inside, the boy smirked mischievously.
A/N: Short but fun. This in no way reflects my view on White Rose; I love me them smuts ;p
Up next: Weiss Reacts to…..Mary Sues!