Zetsu finished and handed Natsumi his letter.

Natsumi read it over, her eyebrows furrowing, giving her a puzzled look.

"What's wrong with it?" the white half asked pleasantly.

"I am not redoing it," the black half growled.

"Um, nothing is wrong….just that…its…you know…you know what? Never mind, its fine." Natsumi sighed.

"Good," the black half said.

"Yes, splendid! Mind you, I am getting hungry!" The white half whined.

Natsumi sweat dropped. "Oh gee, look at that, your time is up! Time to leave, there is plenty of delicious food out there, yup there sure is!"

On cue, Hisa immediately pushed Zetsu out the door and locked it. "Thank you for your time!"

"That was close," Natsumi deadpanned.

"Yes, it should be wise of us in the future to not invite potentially cannibalistic characters for these things," Hisa agreed.

"True that."

"Next on the list then, its….Konan!"

A pretty blue haired woman with an origami rose on her head walked up and took the clipboard from Natsumi. Quietly, she began to write.

Dear Fanfiction Authors,

It disappoints me how many of you misrepresent the akatsuki and I. First of all, the akatsuki was made on the foundation of Yahiko, Nagato's, and my dream. Granted, I was not happy with following Madara or the new members that joined, but sometimes you have to take a different path to achieve the end goal. However, I rather follow Madara then put up with these so called rainbow eyed recruits. Honestly, since I do the recruiting (with Nagato's final approval of course), we look for efficient and ruthless s-class missing nin, not whiny women claiming to be all powerful and host a bijuu in their bodies. Last time I checked we captured most of the bijuu and the only two left are hosted by Uzumaki Naruto and Killer Bee. There is simply no such thing as a sixteen tailed panda, how absurd. Besides, if these recruits were really so brilliant as they claimed, why are they so easily kidnapped by Kisame and Itachi? Knowing that Itachi and Kisame have good judgement, they would probably drop the recruit instead of taking her back.

Furthermore, I don't know why all of you are convinced that I am automatically happy when a female is brought to our group. Being the only woman in the akatsuki hasn't bothered me before, and it certainly doesn't bother me now. Its not in my nature to immediately act "maternal" towards this girl, I simply do not care. Worse is when I have to behave like a jealous bitch who has nothing better to do than whine about the new recruit, look bad, and kiss the floor that Nagato/Deva path walks on. Look, I love Nagato, but I don't worship him…I am just very protective of him, he is all that I have left. We have a very mutual respect for each other.

Please make your stories more accurate, most of them are kind of pitiful,

Sincerely,

Konan