Hello my fabulous readers who I love so much for supporting meeeee!
I just wanted to thank those of you who leave me feedback and encouragement, you have no idea how much it helps me. So here's another update! I am finally at one of places I'm most excited about writing and Im sorry I keep leaving you all on cliffhangers for so long but thats what every single fanfiction I have ever read does to me so now it's my turn.
Well anyway I hope you like it.
Disclaimer - I still don't own Frozen or it's characters. It belongs to the company responsible for 99% of our childhood: Disney.
Breathe. Breathe. FUCKING BREATHE.
I inhaled sharply when I realized I had stopped breathing. My eyes seemed to have been taking up all of my brain's processing as I stared at my sounding alarm clock. "6:00am"… no "6:01am" blinked in bright red numbers. I didn't find the strength to move my arm to shut the alarm off until 6:07am. I felt strange and uncomfortable as I sat up in my bed. Every surface of my room was dusted in a thick sheet of snow I had conjured up in the short time I had actually I slept. I rubbed my temples as I stared at the frosty site. Today was my first day of university and my nerves were doing backflips. My body was shaking uncontrollably as I struggled to stand up hanging onto the side table to steady my wobbly legs.
Get a hold of yourself Elsa.
My walk to the bathroom felt like an eternity with my jello legs refusing to cooperate. I looked at myself for the first time in days, assessing the damage and what could be done to make myself look presentable. I turned the sink on and with shivering hands I tried my best to catch water from the sink to splash my face. I slapped my cheeks several times trying to snap out of my anxious state.
I hadn't been in a school setting since I was 5 years old. The memories of any and everything wrong I did in that time replayed in my mind and I gripped the counter to balance myself. I could hear the screams of the boy I had almost crushed under pounds of snow when I had made the snow storm by accident. I couldn't let something like that ever happen again.
In that moment I felt a sharp jabbing in my stomach causing me to dive towards the toilet and kneel over it. My throat burned as I retched into the bowl, it was mostly a colorless bile because of how little I'd eaten yesterday. I sited my nerves as the cause of the disgusting episode, but I never anticipated I would have reacted this badly. I was barely in command of my own body and this could only mean bad things for the rest of the day if I couldn't get myself in check.
When I was certain I wasn't going to hurl anymore I stood up and brushed my teeth to get rid of the awful taste. I was a mess. I was terrified. There are going to be people everywhere in that campus, I'll have nowhere to hide. I moved my shaky hands to my hair and undid my braid to comb my unusually light blonde hair, something I never understood. I've never seen a relative with hair as faintly blonde as mine unless they were old, then it was just white. I was always an outsider and today was only going to be a reminder of that. I looked at my reflection critically, my blue eyes were wide and anxious, the little color I had on my face had disappeared, leaving me as white as a sheet.
After showering, throwing on a couple layers of warm clothes and my favorite purple gloves, I was finally ready for school. I stood in the garage holding my messenger bag firmly to my side for what felt like an eternity, deciding whether it was worth it to leave. After some self-coaxing I climbed into the car my parents had given me. They had it shipped from Santa Monica so I could help myself. It was a classic black range ranger and I had probably driven it a total of 5 times, 3 of which were the lessons I took with my father and the other 2 were the times I took the actual test. It wasn't something I liked to think about. Looking at the fully equipped dashboard, I wished they had got me something less flashy. Wealth meant little to nothing to me, it couldn't buy me an escape or a new life, and instead it just made me feel guilty. There were too many people suffering when I had more than I needed. Another factor of the car was the fact that it was attention drawing, I didn't need anyone singling me out, but there was nothing that could be done about it now.
My parents really thought of everything because there was now a garage opener attached to my car keys. I clicked it and started the car, as the garage opened, snow began flying into the garage. I squinted my eyes as I drove out and paused in my driveway waiting for the garage door to close again. It was so bright and the excessive blankets of snow covering everything made it no better on my eyes.
I glanced over at Anna and Hans' house, everything appeared quieter than usual over there. It had been quite a few days since I last saw Anna after our fallout but I didn't expect any different, I was very harsh. Hans was oddly ok with everything or maybe she hadn't told him anything and still acted overly friendly whenever he saw me. He came back very late the day I babysat Anna, she fell asleep on my couch and he carried her out, thanking me way more than he should have. I knew pushing Anna out was the right thing to do yet it couldn't have felt more wrong somewhere deep inside of me where I refused to admit it.
I shook my head, trying to stop my thoughts from consuming me I had other things to concentrate on today. I pulled my emergency break down, put the car in drive and began my route to the school.
The University was probably the biggest school I'd ever seen in my life, mainly because it was one of the few I've been to. Being anywhere with a large congregation of any kind of people was something to be avoided at all costs. I was right about the stares. A couple students stopped in their tracks to ogle my vehicle. I could hear a group of boys who obviously knew more about the car than I did hollering comments loudly as I pulled into a parking spot. "DUDE! It's a fucking range rover!", "That's my dream car!" "Those rims are sick!"
I hopped out of the car quickly and pulled the hood of my thick jacket over my head in an effort to keep minimal eye contact with the students I would pass. I wasn't sure if any of the people who stared at my car had called to me because I was already half way across the parking lot making my way to the campus. The wind hitting my skin was cold but I felt colder. When I got onto the campus grounds I dug into my bag for the paper with my schedule. I tried to walk and read at the same time occasionally looking up at the numbers on the buildings. My first class was a computer programming class in building 23. All the buildings I could see were all in the single digits, it was all very confusing. I had a few minutes to get to the class and it felt like I was walking in circles.
Suddenly in my frustrated state, I felt someone slam into me hard and I held my breath as I fell to the ground, thanking God it didn't set my powers off. I looked up to see a girl with green eyes and ridiculously long golden hair staring at me. Her books were scattered all around us and our schedule papers were now blowing in the wind.
"Oh no no no!" the girl squealed springing to her feet.
I watched dumbfounded as she chased our papers, catching the attention of a few students who chuckled at this silly girl who had hair almost taller than she was, hopping around.
I covered my face in embarrassment, I had fallen flat on my ass, the pain slowly creeping up my spine. I gathered her books together mostly because she was doing me a favor by catching my schedule. I stood up and brushed the snow off of my clothes holding her books close to my chest. She caught them after a minute or two and practically ran over to me.
"Jesus! So sorry about all that, I wasn't looking at where I was going" she apologized fairly out of breath.
"Well I guess that makes two of us. I wasn't looking out either…"
We stood there awkwardly for half a second before the girl looked at my schedule and learned my name from it. "Here's your schedule back, Elsa." She held out the paper in my direction.
I almost twitched at the sound of another stranger learning my name but took the paper in exchange for her books "Thanks, and here's your books back ummm…"
"Rachel." She answered quickly. "My name's Rachel."
"Err nice to meet you Rachel." I replied. "Well bye!" I turned around and began walking.
"Wait! Where are you headed?"
Lord Jesus it's happening again.
She was sort of jogging to keep up with me.
Nope not again.
What did I ever do to deserve this?
"Oh my Gosh me too! What are the odds...?"
I forced a laugh "Yeah great…."
I'm going to kill myself.
I could hardly believe how ok the day turned out to be. My hands burned the whole time but nothing happened that was too unusual. I didn't speak to anyone but Rachel somehow ended up in 2 of my classes and she didn't stop talking the whole time. I leant she was a freshman and she had a boyfriend and she was an Art major with a minor in computer sciences, she wanted to be an animator of some sort since she believes old school artists tend to end up homeless nowadays. I didn't reveal anything about myself other than my name and she was ok with it. She reminded me of Anna in a way.
It took me a good 15 minutes to slip away from Rachel who had followed me all the way to my car and stood there talking with me. I had to tell her I had to meet someone about a part time job interview so she would leave. I had to be careful about avoiding this one from now on.
When I arrived home I decided not to park my car in the garage, my successful day at school encouraged me so I thought I would venture out to the supermarket and get some ingredients for a pie or something. I stepped out of the car into the chilly air and became instantly annoyed at the sounds assaulting my ears. A dog- Sven, no doubt- was barking ridiculously loud. I looked over at the house. Hans' police car was gone. He couldn't bark forever.
I hurried inside to check my pantry and refrigerator for what I needed. The barking didn't get any lower, in fact it sounded louder. More frantic. How in the world was he making so much noise? I felt an eye twitch I didn't even know I had as I made a list of ingredients to get at the store when Sven began howling so loudly I flung my pen across the room. That was quite enough.
I walked to my backyard and peered over at their backyard. Sven wasn't outside. The barking became louder. My head began pounding.
Do they not know how to fucking control their dog?
I marched to their front door and began knocking violently.
"Anna! I know you're in there! Shut that damn dog of yours up!"
There was no human response only more howling which sounded closer than ever. Sven must have hear me yelling because I could also hear him scratching against the door. She had to be home, it's the middle of the week and Hans' police car was missing, which means he's at work. She couldn't possibly be with him and she takes that damn dog everywhere. His yelping and howling were beginning to sound hysterical He jumped up against the window tearing down the curtains. When he saw me he began flipping out and ran back and forth down the hallway.
What in the hell is going on here?
"What the hell is wrong with you Sven?" I said, as if he could understand me. "Shut the fuck up!" I walked along the side of the house to another window. Sven howled and tugged at the blinds as if he wanted me to see inside. I could make out a broken lamp on the floor briefly as he tugged harder on the curtains until he pulled it down completely.
Nothing could prepare me for what I could now see through that window.
Anna lay motionless on the floor, her head covered in blood, a large puddle forming under her.
"Anna!" I screamed, pounding on the window "ANNA!"
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I'll try not to have you in the dark for too long.
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