Paradise By Natalie Elizabeth


"Spike please don't make this harder than it already is"

"You're the one who is making this hard, Buffy I love you and you love me"

"Spike I don't love you"

"Don't, you mean wont,"

"I said don't and I mean it"

"Fine Summers if you don't love me I'll leave, I'll leave and never come back"

Chapter 1

It had been five long years since the night Spike left her, five years since she told Spike that she didn't love him, five long years of loneliness. It wasn't like she had lied to him; she didn't love him, completely any way. There were just so many things going on and she didn't need anymore complications. Not loving Spike was supposed to be easy, hating him even easier, but it wasn't. When they first met it was so simple, kill the extremely annoying vampire, and it wasn't as if he wasn't a vampire anymore, it was that his annoying quality was kind of endearing. Sure he got on her nerves but he was the only vampire who gave her a challenge. Every fight had a surprise and he kept up with her verbal sparing, a rarity amongst vampires. Knowing he would always be around was kind of comforting and not because it was fun to beat him up. He had really become a true friend, knowing her better than anyone. That is why it had been so hard to watch him leave, because it meant saying goodbye to a friend, forever.

A month after he had left a letter arrived at the Summers house addressed to Little Bit Summers, each month one arrived. Now standing in her hallway crying Buffy held yet another letter for Dawn from Spike.

"Hey Buffy, what's up" Dawn said bounding down the stairs full of excitement

"Umm nothing" she said wiping away her tears and hiding Spikes letter behind her back

"So did we get any more R.S.V.P's for the wedding, Willow says the hall needs to know the numbers straight away the weddings in two weeks"

"I know Dawn, I cant believe my little sisters getting married" she said throwing her arms around her sister.

"Buffy" she said holding her "I'm like 20 I am not a little kid anymore"

"I know Dawn, but your making me feel like an old spinster, getting married before me," she said pulling away.

"Buffy, you'll find someone."

"Dawn I am 26 who wants to marry me now. You went to L.A for like a week and met the man of your dreams, the man of my dreams went to L.A and stayed for a lifetime".

"Cheer up Buffy your making me feel bad for marrying Lucas, you do like him don't you."

"Of course I do Dawn, he knows what were are all about and he still loves you. I am yet to find a man who can deal with me not to mention the rest of the Scoobies. Its just this house is going to be so empty with out you here."

"Well Willow said you could move in with her and Tara."

"Hey Dawnie" Willow said coming through the door with Tara in tow "What did I say."

"That Buffy could move in with you guys when I go."

"Yeah sure we need a room mate."

"Thanks but I have told you guys I'll be fine," Buffy was starting to get sick of them worrying. This was her house and she wasn't going to sell it just cause she was lonely. She could get a roommate, maybe.

"Well ok, so Dawn have you got me a number for the hall or do I have to strangle you slowly" Willow said approaching her.

"Nope, Will I have it I have just one more I am waiting on," Dawn began to look through the mail by the telephone.

Buffy suddenly realised what Dawn was looking for and handed the letter to her. "Is this what your looking for, you know Dawn you haven't seen him for five years what makes you think he will come."

"It's only been 2 and a half years and he promised."

Buffys eyes suddenly widened "What do you mean 2 and a half years, when did you see him, was he here"

Dawn looked guiltily at Buffy "Umm it was when I went to L.A, that's why I was so eager to go"

"What, why didn't you tell me"

"He didn't want you to know, he thought you wouldn't let me see him"

"Oh" Buffy said disheartened. He went to L.A, he didn't want to see her "Well umm is he coming."

Dawn began to quickly read the letter, "Oh my god hes coming" Dawn said jumping up and down.

"Auntie Dawn, Auntie Dawn I'm here. Can we go try on the pretty dresses now?" Dawn looked down at the little girl who had just run in hugging her legs.

"Hey Jessica, hey Anya" she said to the girls mother coming in the door looking tired.

"Little girls can be so tiresome"

"Hey auntie Dawnie I have been practising my walking watch" Jessica began to walk around the room taking two steps then stoping to throw imaginary flowers.

"That's very good Jess but guess what?" Dawn said crouching down to the little girls level "Uncle Spike is coming to my wedding."

"Yeah the super warriors are going to be back together"

Buffy raised her eyebrows at Anya and Anya shrugged "Umm honey, super warriors"

"Yep mommy, aunty Dawn told me about aunty Buffy and uncle Spike saving the world, the evil monsters come and then hi yah the super warriors kill the monsters and save mummy and daddy" she said moving into a fighting stance.

Buffy glared at Dawn and she smiled sheepishly "What, come on lets get down to the bridal shop".

* * * * *

Buffy walked around the bridal shop, while Dawn and her friends ohhed and ahhed about Dawns dress, while the final adjustments were being made. Buffy had tried on her dress and was now looking at the bridal dresses hanging on the rack. This one is so beautiful, to bad I am never gonna get to wear one of these, she thought. Buffy began feeling the soft silk of one of the dresses when Willow came up.

"Hey Buffy you ok you look glum."

Buffy turned and gave Willow a weak smile "I'm ok, its just making me feel really lonely, you know, making me realise that I am never gonna get to wear one of these" she said flinging one of the garments.

"Don't give up hope"

"I am 26 who is gonna marry me, Xander and Anya are married, you and Tara are married sorta, you know that whole ceremony thingy, now Dawns getting married."

"Even Angel's married," Willow piped up then quickly regretted it

Buffy glared at Willow then smiled "Yeah who would have thought any one would marry Cordy, especially Angel."

"I am sorry Buffy I should have never brought it up."

"No Will its ok, I wasn't in love with him anymore when he reached his redemption, it made sense for him and Cordy, they were in love."

"And you're all alone."

"Yeah," she said looking down

"Hey guys what's up" Dawn said grinning in her wedding dress.

"Dawn you look gorgeous" Buffy said trying to smile.

"We were discussing your wedding, so umm how many people are coming to the ceremony." Willow said quickly trying to hide Buffys sadness

"Oh I told everyone that it was a family thing, so basically its just you guys and few of my friends, it was hard to find a church that didn't have a lot of windows, we don't wanna make Spike the confetti now do we."

Buffy and Willow raised their eyebrows at Dawn

"Hey you guys you have to be nice to him he is really looking forward to seeing the gang again."

"Yeah well we missed him right," Willow said elbowing Buffy

"Umm yeah can't wait," she said dripping with sarcasm.