A/N: Sorry for the delay, this chapter is short but it is so so important! Thanks for reading, please review!

You are at a bar, drinking yourself into oblivion. You are beyond frustrated, scared, hurt, angry, devastated. Annoyed. You want your life back; you don't want to feel like you are walking on eggshells, that you are dependent on your cell phone, that you ignore your son. You want

everything to go back to normal, and you want it desperately.

And you know it will never happen; because regardless of how this turns out the fact will forever remain that JJ has cancer.

And the horrible thought finally enters your mind, and even though you have been fighting to keep it away- you find yourself unable to fight it anymore. What are you going to do if JJ dies? What are you and Henry going to do?

You cannot raise him yourself, there is no way. You cannot possibly do everything JJ does for your boy; you don't know how to sing for him, or know when he needs to go see a doctor or if it's just a cold. You don't know how to make muffins in the morning, or pick out clothes that look nice but can hold up and take a beating.

It's overwhelming and tears sting your eyes as the thought stays with you.

You are sipping on your third beer when your phone rings. "Shit!" You curse to yourself as you pat your pockets for the device. You panic when you cannot find it, but a glowing light on the floor catches your attention.. but as you bend down to grab it, the floor seems to jump up at you and you find yourself eating the floor.

Your face hits the phone, and the thing shatters. And you sit there, staring at it; before you put your face into your hands. And cry.


You wander into the hospital hours later, you are swaying side to side, as the hallway seems to shift in front of you. You spent far too long at the bar, but you are feeling better; a lot better than you have in weeks.

"Hey Hotch!" You wave as you see the man standing outside of JJ's room.

"Will?" His voice is soft, different and he walks towards you.

"Hotch, man, I am so sorry, I didn't mean to be gone so long." You tell him.

"How much have you had to drink, Will?" He asks and you shake your head.

"Not much."

"Your drunk, Will." He tells you and his next movement sends your temper flying. He blocks you from entering JJ's room. "No. Go home, I will call a cab."

"What the hell, Hotch!" You try and push past him but he is stronger and much more coordinated than you right now.

"Will!" He raises his voice a bit. "Listen. Go home, you cannot let her see you like this!"

And you stop, his words hitting you like a train. "Wait.. what?"

Hotch smiles. "We've been trying to call you Will. JJ woke up. She's awake Will."

And for the first time in weeks, you feel you can breathe.