October 21, 2014

Edward was dreading this since Jacob imprinted on Renessmee. He knew it would happen; Alice had foreseen it; and Rose and Alice had been planning ever since. Actually, I was indifferent. Jacob is one of my best friends; he's the one I talk to because he knows me. He was there when Edward wasn't; that bond doesn't go away. When I think about the perfect guy to marry my daughter, it would be obviously Jake.

My husband wasn't thinking like that. He was thinking like a father. He has spent many nights talking to my Dad—not sure what they talk about, but when Edward returns, he seems less anxious. But today, he knew it was coming-today.

I encouraged Edward to get his mind off the subject, and usually playing the piano helps him—not today. You could tell the mood of the house based on the music he was playing and lyrics he was singing. First, he played "Memory" from Cats, and he stressed "all alone in the moonlight. "Then, he followed with "Think of Me" from Phantom of the Opera—"think of me, think of me fondly when you say goodbye." Yikes, really? To add to his repertoire, he added a medley from Wicked of "I'm not that girl," "For Good," and "No Good Deed." And that was enough for me. Usually, I leave him in the music room unless he invites him, because that's his "man cave" or "sanctuary," but this had to be addressed.

"Edward?" He didn't face me. His hands were still on the keys. "If this is a poker face, it sucks."

"What do you mean?" It was not a question. It was telling me he wanted to talk.

"Do you really think no good deed goes unpunished? That would mean when you repeatedly saved my life, it was worthless."

"I didn't—"

"I know that, but Jacob is a part of this family whether you like it or not. He's been part of my family since you left me, and part of this family since he imprinted on our daughter and risked his pack and his life against the newborns and the Volturi." The mention of his abandonment is not a knife I use often, but he needed to see I had grown from aggravated to pissed.

Edward put his face into his hands. "I'm sorry, Bella. I'm just frustrated. We've had just only four years with her, and we're losing her. Our little girl will be a married woman and not ours anymore. It's just ….not….fair."

I slipped next to him on the piano bench. "Honey, we knew this was going to happen. Everything was in fast forward, but you need to see that she's not going anywhere. She may live in another house, live with someone else, and live her own life, but we will have her for more time that human parents would wish for. No, she's not a little girl, but it is a beginning."

Edward pushed the piano and stomped on the floor. "I DON'T WANT ANOTHER BEGINNING," and left the room. My friends, this was a guy temper tantrum. Who's the child now?