AUTHOR'S NOTE: Hey guys this is my first time uploading my fanfic to the site, this story will be multi-chaptered and I would appreciate if you could review honestly. :)

I DO NOT OWN ANY OF THESE CHARACTERS. THEY BELONG TO ABC.

"YOU ABSOLUTE SWINE. I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU DID THAT. I THOUGHT OUR MARRIAGE WAS STRONGER THAN THIS. TRUE LOVE'S KISS MY ASS."

Now those were some choice phrases Emma Swan never expected to hear from her parents.

She had just woken up, rubbing her eyes, to hear her mother hollering insults at her dad at a tumultuous volume. Wait, had she just thought of David as-her dad? Well that was a new development. After months and months of refusing to see him as her parent, it seemed she had finally accepted his role in her life. Not that she should have been surprised, since their return from Neverland, she had been bonding with David a lot more.

However, she couldn't help but feel it was too late. Her parents were planning on having another child, Mary Margaret's confession in the echo caves had shown that she didn't feel fulfilled as a mother. Emma wasn't sure how that made her feel. All her life, all she'd ever wanted was to feel loved, to have a mother, and now she had one, who didn't seem to know how to be one.

She was snapped out of her reverie by David snapping back with equal vigour, "YOU HYPOCRITE! YOU DID THE SAME THING TO ME NOT TEN SECONDS AGO."

Confused now, Emma pushed back the covers on her bed, slipped into her dressing gown and slippers, and head out into the living room. She was about to make a comment, but she was interrupted by a deep, smooth, and all too familiar voice.

"Trouble in paradise mate?" Killian stepped out from the bathroom in a towel wrapped around the bottom half of his body, the top half unapologetically bare. He hadn't completely dried off, so she could see several droplets of moisture trickling down his muscular chest and-

"Nah, just Mario Kart." Emma quickly jerked her head away from Killian's dripping torso to stare at her parents in disbelief.

"Mario Kart? Are you kidding me? You sounded ready to wage war." All eyes in the room snapped around to look at her, only just noticing her entrance.

"Morning Swan. Nice get up." He winked and looked her up and down hungrily, which made her feel giddy. "What's this 'Mario Kart' you speak of?"

"A game." Mary Margaret answered. "Wait, why are you even here Hook?" She asked with a glare that would have made most men cower at her feet.

But Killian just exchanged a glance with David, and Emma saw David turn sheepishly and slowly say "Okay, don't freak out." He looked at Mary Margaret with wide eyes.

"I won't if you don't give me a reason to." Mary Margaret said in a sickly sweet tone.

"Okay. Well uh-I kinda invited Hook to live with us for a while."

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. "WHAT?!" Emma thought back to that old Disney musical of Snow White and the Seven Dwarves, and realised it could not have been further from the truth. The real Snow White was terrifying.

"Yeah, well we were talking last night and-" Emma admired David's courage. Truly

"I don't care. Absolutely not. Completely out of the question. What about his ship?" Mary Margaret glared at Killian. He merely shrugged.

"You wouldn't want me being lonely would you love?" He looked out her with puppy dog eyes.

"Come on Snow, it's only for a while until he finds his own place, and you're the only one who minds."

Emma raised her eyebrows at that.

Mary Margaret looked extremely pained for a few seconds before she threw her hands up above her head in surrender and said with an air of exasperation, "You know what? You're gonna stay no matter what I have to say about it, so just whatever. Stay. Just don't touch anything." With that she stormed off.

Killian grinned a smile that spread from ear to ear and then suddenly went completely serious again and said "Can someone please explain to me what Mario Kart actually is?" He looked at Emma and David expectantly.

"It's a driving game." David answered as if it were obvious.

"Yeah but why were you and Snow getting all angsty and sweaty over it? I know you guys have some weird kinks but…"

David glared at him before rolling his eyes and saying with a smirk, "Mario Kart my friend, is the 2nd highest cause of homicide in the USA today."

"Oh? What's the first?"

David waited a few seconds, then this time, looked at Killian without a trace of a smile.

"Monopoly."