Disclaimer:I do not own anything to do with Harry Potter. In this story I only own the plot, otherwise I am just playing in J. K. Rowling's sandbox.

Story keys:

"Regular speech"

"Mind speech"

Thoughts, Spells

§Parseltongue§

Titles (Books etc.)

A/N: Hellooo folks! I'm sorry for the longer than last wait but I hit a snag in Slytherin's rooms. And please, take the time to read this A/N, it clears out some confusions regarding old vs modern stuff.

Now, before we get started I thought I'd address some points you made to me about my interior design; I know that Hogwarts was founded a long time ago and that things such as fancy glasses and nice woodwork and things like that did not exist - for the Muggles. My reasoning is that the foundation of what today is the purebloods' conviction in their own superiority comes from their being able to do just about anything at that time when muggles were indeed not so advanced. In my mind there is no doubt that you could already at that time shape a piece of glass, of conjure one, into a magnificent crystal glass, or make a great piece of wooden relief. Everything there is made from sturdy, natural materials (i.e. no plastic) and could in my mind be created by someone skilled in transfiguration and conjuration.

It has also been pointed out to me that even wizarding photos did not exist at that time, which is absolutely correct. What Harry saw on the mantel wasn't actually a photograph, it is merely described as such because that is what it looked like to Harry. I have been asked about it so I thought I'd explain it to all of you, that is after all only fair. The "photograph" on Slytherin's mantle is really a wooden frame carved with runes similar to those in a pensieve. A specific memory is then imprinted into the frame and replayed in between the runes. Now before you start in on me regarding pensieves, I couldn't find very much information on them, other than that they are old, made from stone and carved with runes. I've drawn my own conclusions from there and if you don't like it - tough luck!

Now! On to things more easily spoken of, I will (reluctantly) say thank you to my crazy but faithful "beta" MysteriaMalfoy for outlasting my agonized rants on conversation swamps. Love you, deary! :*

Since that is now finally taken care of (phew) - Chapter 3 everyone :) It's short and sort of a part 1 but it's what I have right now.


Chapter 3: Marvin

Last time:

In the painting, sitting on a leather armchair in what looked like a mirror image of the room where Harry was standing, stroking the head of what looked like a much, much younger basilisk, was Salazar Slytherin.


Harry could only stare. Slytherin looked exactly like the statue out in the Chamber; early-thirties, tall, slim frame, small goatee and mustache and low ponytail, intelligent and amused eyes and aristocratic posture. What took Harry by surprise, though, was the man's coloring. Harry had always pictured Salazar Slytherin with dark hair and black eyes, molding him as a predecessor of Snape the Creepy Dungeon Bat in a way. And while this man indeed had dark hair, it was not black – it was a deep red, a few shades redder than mahogany. And his eyes were a sparkling green that made Harry think of the snakes guarding the second door to the Chamber. Coupled with his somewhat tan skin, black slacks and waistcoat, white shirt and bottle green robes and cravat he cut a most striking figure.

§What... How... But... I?..§ Was the most intelligent comment Harry could make in his shocked state of mind. He slowly fell back down onto the sofa and was stuck there staring at Sytherin while the Founder chuckled at him.

§While I am most pleased with your... impressed, reaction to my prescence I cannot help but observe that you seem to be surprised to find me here. Why is that?§ Slytherin asked, not seeming at all surprised but more pleased that someone had just walked into his personal chambers for the first time in almost a millennia.

As Harry hastily gathered his wits about him by pushing his shock to the back of his mind, he cleared his throat and said,

§Well, that might be because I had no idea that I would find you here, Sir. You see, no one has managed to get into your Chamber for the past 50 years, and before that the last person to enter was, well, you. I entered two years ago but I haven't been back there until today. And the only reason I came down here today was to blow something up... but I've changed my mind on that...§ He trailed off at the end as he saw Slytherin's expression close off and take on a stonelike quality that told Harry that he should probably not say anything else just now.

§Explain.§

§Well, since you need parseltongue to open the Chamber...§ And so Harry talked. Starting with the biased opinion of parseltongue and parselmouths and continuing on to the public view of Slytherin as an evil wizard who had supposedly abandoned the school, the prejudices between the Houses, the attacks two years earlier and Voldemort's rise to power along with his confident claim to the title of Slytherin's Heir – at this Slytherin's eyebrows rose but he let Harry continue without interruption – and Voldemort looking for and finding the Chamber as a confimation to his inheritance and lastly, of the legend that was The Chamber of Secrets.

When he finally finished Harry's throat was sore and Sytherin was staring off into space while muttering profanities in parseltongue that would make even Uncle Vernon impressed.

After a few minutes of uniterrupted stewing Slytherin grew silent and switched pastime from swearing to staring, at Harry. And while Harry was used to people staring at him and had gotten very good (if he said so himself) at ignoring people staring at him, there was something about the openly calculating glint in the ancient founder's gaze that made him nervous. But if there was one thing he had learned from all the times Uncle Vernon and Aunt Petunia had screamed at him for being a waste of space, or Hermione was yelling at him and Ron for neglecting their education, or Snape was ranting about his father; it was patience. It was not always easy, Merlin knows most of the time it was dead hard! but he had learned. So now he sat there, waiting for Slytherin to finish inspecting him.

§Why did you only come down here to destroy something? While I will readily agree that it is a good place to rant and rave at unsuspecting idiots that was not its main purpose.§ Slytherin finally broke the silence with a suspiciously calm tone of voice. Harry let out a small sigh of relief, they had been staring at each other for almost fifteen minutes.

Harry decided that honesty was the way to go here. Lying always came back to bite him in the arse in the end and he thought it would be the pinnacle of rudeness to lie to the Founder in his own personal chambers – and say what you will about the Dursleys, but they did raise him to be polite.

§Well, let's just say that the level of idiocy in this place seems to grow with every year and it has just reached previously unvisited levels. I had to get away from the others before I blew someone up and since I am the only one inside the walls that can come down here I thought it was a good idea. Mind you, that was while the only part of the Chamber I had seen was the glamour/ illusion part. To be honest – had I not found this I probably would have blown the place to pieces.§

§Idiocy, huh?§ Slytherin arched an eyebrow and smirked. §Why, if I didn't know better I'd say that you had an unfortunate run in with the lions of the school. They usually are the perpetrators of idiocy around here. At least the kind of idiocy you seem to have fallen prey to.§

Harry just stared at Slytherin. He didn't seem angry or annoyed at all! He seemed, amused. As if it was a common and somewhat appreciated break in routine that Gryffindors did stupid things. Weren't Slytherin and Gryffindor the biggest of enemies? What the hell is going on?

§Well...§ Harry figured that he should just go with it at this point. He'd go back up to the dorm later and hopefully forget all about this wierd encounter by tomorrow. §Both yes and no.§ He said as he wondered at the wisdom of letting the Founder know that it was actually his House that was the worst, closely followed by the Hufflepuffs and only then the Gryffindors.

§It's actually... the Slytherins that are the worst. The Gryffindors are third in line, Hufflepuff is second.§

He quickly stopped speaking as Slytherin looked as if someone had just hit him over the head with something hard.

Slyherin narrowed his eyes. §What happened to the Slytherin House rules of looking after our own?§ His voice was dangerous and Harry almost sincerely felt sorry for Snape if this rule was supposed to extend to the rest of the school for any Slytherin that had already graduated and returned to teach. If Slytherin got a hold of Snape in this mood it looked as if they might as well start planning his funeral then and there.

§Oh, I'm sure nothing has happened to them§ Harry tried to assure the upset founder. §They're probably still fully functional,§ especially if Snape's actions towards any Slytherin at any given time is anything to go by. Harry finished the sentence quietly to himself.

§It cannot be if they have targeted you and made you so upset you had to get away even from them in order to have some semblance of quiet! The House common room and the dorms are meant for this precise purpose!§

He thinks I'm a Slytherin?! Harry just sat there with his mouth open... When did I ever make it sound like I was in Slytherin?

§Wait!§ Harry cuts off Slytherin's rant over dunderheads with no respect for their Housemates. Somewhere in the back of his head Harry registers with some amusement that the Founder used Snape's favourite derogatory term for all things non-slytherin in origin.

§I'm sure it still stands, it's just that I'm not in Slytherin so it wouldn't apply to me!§

§What do you mean you're not in my House?§ And he looks genuinely confused, as if it was a perfectly understandable confusion at a time like this.

§I mean that I am not in your House, I'm a Gryffindor.§

Big silence.

And then Slytherin starts to laugh. A loud, real, belly-ache laugh that makes Harry's own lips twitch a little as he watches the millennium old Founder laugh at the idea of Harry being in Gryffindor.

§It's true, Sir.§ Harry said and pointed to the clearly scarlet crest on his school robes.

Slytherin just stared at the crest like he couldn't believe it.

§By the stars, you actually meant it.§ Slytherin eventually got his tongue back and sat up straight in his chair before pinning Harry with a confused look. §What in the seven circles of Hades went wrong with your sorting?! Did Marvin lose his mind, did you bribe him? He always was a stickler for the rules unless you bribed him with something old. Something about spending all his working time in the heads of eleven year olds gave him a taste for the ancient, I think he said.§

This was not the direction Harry thought this conversation would go.

§Who is Marvin?§

§They got rid of Marvin?! That can't be right, I know I felt him just a few weeks ago.§ Slytherin wrinkled his brows together. §What happened to him?§

Harry was now thoroughly confused. Not only had someone by the name of Marvin apparently lost his mind and messed up Harry's sorting, but said Marvin was also supposed to be a personal aquaintance of Slytherin's which would make him as old as Hogwarts herself and... Something was really wrong here.

§Who is Marvin? And how could he have messed up my sorting? I thought no one could influence the Hat? Well, other then the person getting sorted that is.§ He finished as he thought of his own conversation with the Hat just over three years ago. But he also remebered the Hat being most displeased with putting him in a House where it did not think that he would reach his full potential, so how someone could have possibly managed to convince it to put him in Gryffindor while he was tellling the Hat to do so himself, and the Hat was still annoyed... He quickly shook his head. It didn't add up. He was missing at least a dozen pieces if he wanted to solve this puzzle.

Slytherin gve him an annoyed look and Harry couldn't help but think that the Founder seemed a lot more willing to let Harry see a bit of his actual personality now than when he had first come into the room talking about blowing up the Founder's precious Chamber. Huh, when I put it that way then maybe that isn't so surprising.

§I thought you said you didn't know anyone named Marvin. Why are you lying to me?§

§What? But I don't know anyone named Marvin!§ How had they gotten into this argument again?

§But you just said you got sorted by a hat!§

§Yes! But what does a Marvin have to do with any of it?!§ Harry was almost yelling out of frustration now, and the basilisk had curled up around the bottom of Slytherin's chair and was chuckling to itself in that strange way that snakes laugh.

§The Hat's name is Marvin!§ Slytherin finally threw out with an air of incredulity. §You mean to tell me that he is still sorting students, just like we tasked him, after 1000 years, but no one even knows his name? Now that is just ungrateful!§ Slytherin sank back down into his seat that he had vacated in the heated non-argument conversation with a huff.

Well, that explains a little... Harry arched an eyebrow §You named a hat Marvin?§

Slytherin sighed and rubbed a hand over his eyes, §No, Ricky named a hat Marvin. I tried to convince him otherwise but for some reason he said that the Hat was a Marvin and there was nothing he could do about it. Something I have never understood. Owen was after all the one with all the answers, not me.§

Ricky? Owen?

TBC...


A/N:So, like I said at the top this is sort of a Part 1, the rest of this highly strange conversation will be up... relatively soon, I'm kinda stuck in this unreasonably deep conversational swamp right now and swimming is turning out to be nearly impossible.

Anyway, I'm hoping for reviews and comments and questions from all of you (even if it's just to criticize my grammar) so fire away, y'all! :D

'Til next time

Yours faithfully

/ APotterPersona

Uploaded: 7 April 2014