A/N. Hi, so this is my first SMASH fanfic and the first creative piece of writing I have done in a loooong time. I hated that SMASH was cut short and I think there's a lot more to play with in these characters. That being said, this story will not follow SMASH's original storyline too closely and some characters (particulatly Karen) are quite different. So on that note, I hope you enjoy chapter one! And thanks for reading.
Chapter one - I Wanna Be Loved by You
"I'm sorry, I don't know how to say this…" she hesitated and glanced down at her hands, fingers fidgeting with the edge of her shirt. She pulled at a loose purple thread and tried to keep her body upright and indifferent.
He was staring at her, deep blue eyes trying desperately to catch hold of her muddy brown irises. He grabbed her hand harshly to stop her pulling at her clothes and delaying the evitable.
"Just say it."
"I can't do this anymore," she sighed under her breath. "I'm really sorry to do this to you, I am. But we're just not working out. I know deep down you feel it to. We gave it a good shot," everything she had planned to say all ran out of her mouth at once.
He was stunned now she'd finally got the words out. He knew it was coming; she'd been avoiding spending much time with him for the last few weeks. She'd appear at his apartment late at night, they'd have sex and she'd sneak off with a different excuse each time. He just didn't know what had happened. She made it seem like it had been a long build up to an evitable end but Dev just didn't feel the same.
His relationship with Karen had been going great for the last five months. She'd been a challenge to pin down for sure; a wild spirit was how he described her to his friends. But they'd been fine and he was happy, very happy. Then boom! She started speaking to him less and less and he could feel her distancing herself. She'd text rather than call. And when he tried to plan evenings out, dinner or a movie she'd started to hesitate with an answer an skip every other offer he made.
"What happened Karen?"
"Dev don't, please just leave it," she said harshly.
"Look at me," he demanded, getting angry and worried that she really was doing this. She was really ending things so abruptly. "What happened? I thought you wanted this, you told me that you wanted us to be together. Karen I really care about you. I don't want to break up. Damn it I think I'm falling in love with you."
She was beginning to panic. Of all the break ups she'd been the instigator for this was fast becoming the most difficult. But it was time. It had to be done. And she knew just how to do it.
"That's the point. I don't love you!" she said clearly. She looked up to see the pain in his face and knew it was okay. He needed to get over her and move on. She pulled her hand from his grasp and moved away from his body slightly.
Dev was near perfect. He came from a lovely family, close and welcoming to her. He had a lot of friends. He had a solid job on the path to an impressive career beginning in local politics with the potential to take him to high places. He was a tentative lover, a romantic man, and he just told her that he was basically in love with her.
But it would never work.
"I think it would be best for me to go." Karen stood up from the couch and started gathering her bag and putting on her shoes to make a swift exit from his apartment.
He remained seated staring at the floor.
She slid the key he had given her only last month off of her key ring and placed it gently on the coffee table. That seemed to trip a stoic Dev into action.
"What the hell Karen. You can't just leave. You haven't let me say or do anything!" he shouted at her as she walked with purpose towards the door.
"I'm sorry," she said again.
"Stop apologising and tell me the truth. What's going on? Is there someone else is that it?" He rose to his feet and started towards her banging his knee on the small oak table in his rush. "Fuck," he spat out between gritted teeth.
"Goodbye Dev," Karen said with one final look over at him. She needed to leave now, before his lost puppy dog look pulled feelings of regret from the back of her mind. She felt like such a bitch as she slammed the door and all but ran from his building.
As she neared the subway station Karen pulled out her cell phone. It wasn't a tech savvy piece of equipment but it did the job.
She held down the number one on the keypad for a couple of seconds and then pushed the phone to her ear.
A voice answered within three tones.
"How'd it go?"
"Terribly," Karen sighed, shrugging her bag strap up her shoulder. She was lingering outside the station, waiting until after her call to head for the train. Signal on the subway was a nightmare. People were bustling passed her towards the steps.
"He'll get over it soon I hope," she said. "It was tough though."
She paused while the voice in her ear told her that it was for the best.
"What are you doing right now?" Karen asked. She waited for a reply.
"Meet me for a drink? I need one!" she giggled lightly at the response. "Meet you there" She said, hanging up the call and turning into the subway station at last.
Karen was mentally praising herself for wearing her doc martin boots today. She hadn't felt like dressing up for a break up and the trek from Dev's Upper Westside abode to downtown Brooklyn at speed would have been seriously impaired by the addition of heels. She pulled her jacket tighly around her; the early spring air had turned chilly all of a sudden as the sky deepened in colour. She could hear the buzz feeding out of the doors to SouthPaw. The bar was beginning to fill as evening fell and a strong martini, or three, was calling her name. There was a band playing and Karen was looking forward to the noise to stop her brain from trawling through the events of this day.
There are no velvet ropes and frills at SouthPaw, and that's just the way she liked it. She pulled her dress down as the wind blew and check her reflected in the bar window, fluffing up her wavy chestnut hair.
Karen entered the bar nodding thanks to the guy who pulled open the door for her as he exited for a smoke. She knew to head to Down South, the bar in the basement of the venue. She scanned the cellar room twice before spotting the back of the one person she couldn't wait to see sat up at the bar. Two glasses were on the bar, one full and one halfway down the hatchet. Karen smiled and shook her head.
She crossed the space between them before creeping up slowly and placing her hands on the shoulders of the person sat on the stool in front of her.
"That drink better be for me," she laughed.
A/N. Thanks for reading. Hope you enjoyed that, I'd love to hear what you think. Come back soon for more.
PS. I am a brit and although I've been googling my locations and geography, it might not be perfect!