Hika-chan: Hi hi! I meant to get this up sooner but.. well I still don't have my own internet and I was too lazy to walk to the computer lab. (ok well I did a couple times but this either wasn't ready or I forgot to put it on a disk. More details in the rant on the bottom….
Oh yeah, in case you didn't know status for upcoming chapters for all my fanfics can be found in my profile.
-Little wing-ed Hika-chan claims no ownership of the characters involved in this story… the story on the other hand… : )
An Inuyasha Fanfic by Hika-chan
Chapter 8: See The Future, See The Past
It had come back to her when she was changing. She had forgotten again, the future-past had been lost to her memory while he was near. At the time when she needed to remember it most, Kagome had forgotten. Some peace came upon her though when she replayed the events in her mind, one strikingly obvious detail she noticed, something she had previously learned to identify was not in his eyes.
Sesshoumaru was not in love with her.
This thought brought her great joy and sorrow at the same time, for she was still convinced that were he to love her he would die. And though this logic meant his life would be saved, it was far too late for her heart. She put a hand to her side, the wounds upon her flesh were the least of her problems, the least painful. She had to leave, she should, she must...
He wanted her trust.
Of course he had it long before he asked it of her, though technically he did not ask, he just told her his want of it. Would he know he had it if she told him she wanted to leave, that she had to... After a few moments thought she knew it would not be a hard sell, but she had to leave, before they became closer than they already were. She made her way to the dinning hall, perhaps he would be there? If not she still needed to eat.
As it turned out Sesshoumaru was absent from the room, only Rin and Jaken were present. The toad seemed completely worn out from his long shift as babysitter. Perhaps she would spend some time with Rin today and give Jaken a break. The teen almost laughed at herself, she was beginning to feel sorry for Jaken! She really had been here too long.
Yes, too long indeed and she had to remember why. She sighed as she sat down, was she getting so air headed that she was going to have to write herself a note? Kami she had only been here what… ten days? "Hello Rin," she said. The girl simply responded with a wave of her hand as she was currently chewing what appeared to be more than she could handle. Kagome simply smiled at her and began on some soup as it was placed in front of her. "Rin, would you like to draw with me after we eat?"
Nodding vigorously the girl finally swallowed her food. "Yes Kagome-neechan I would like that very much."It had been a long time since Kagome had written with a brush, her strokes were a little bit clumsy, but still better than they used to be when she was young. She wasn't sure she had ever drawn with a calligraphy brush before either. She wished she could have shown Rin some crayons and pencils, but her pack was… well wherever her friends were. She smiled as she painted with Rin, her ominous note under her pile of rice paper mostly forgotten in the absence of the lord of the castle. After some time a servant came and informed the girls that it was time for Rin's bath. Kagome told Rin to go on ahead and she would clean up. She cleaned up the ink and stacked all the pictures, Rin's on top, hers on the bottom and the note between them. The Miko left the writing tools in the room, having already been told that a servant would see to them being put where they belong.
She walked down the quiet halls, somewhat curious of where Sesshoumaru had been all day, but she was not surprised that she had not seen him since she woke up. She sighed quietly to herself as she walked down the hall, she had to stop thinking about him so much, "Not that I can really do anything about that," she muttered bitterly as she opened her door.
The miko jumped at the deep voice, dropping the papers about her feet. "About my clumsiness apparently," she said to the youkai, carefully kneeling down to pick up the papers. "So what brings you around this neck of the castle Sesshoumaru-sama?" When he did not answer she turned her face up to look at him, surprised to see him descending. Is he going to help me pick all this up? "You don't have to help me Se-" She stopped he began to rise again, a single slip of paper in his hands, and a slight raise of his eyebrow.
"What is this?"
Kagome froze, instantly recognizing the paper he had picked up. Her mouth opened and shut a few times, but she had no words and her body would not let her lie when it was obviously not going to work.
Sesshoumaru saw that he had her, soon some of his other questions about her earlier babblings were about to be answered. "Death and I are mentioned on the same piece of paper," he mused matter of factly. "Why?" he asked not taking his eyes from the little note. 'I must remember, Sesshoumaru will die if he loves me.' After a few more seconds of Kagome's speechlessness he looked to her. "What makes you think that will come to pass?" Either my death or my love.
She was stuck, what could she say? There was no way around it. What lie could she concoct that he would believe? Oh she had been so stupid! If only she had written "he" instead of "Sesshoumaru" then she might've had something to go with, like a writing story. But noooo, she had to go and use his whole freakin' name didn't she? She looked up at him, surprised that she found no trace of anger or fear in his eyes. She couldn't quite decipher what she saw though, perhaps it was morbid curiosity? What does one feel when a portion of their fate lies before them to read in simple paper and ink? She could only look at him for a long time, a wide array of fearful and worried emotions upon her face. And all the while he just looked back, patiently awaiting her answer.
"Because…" she finally heard herself saying, "I saw it."
"I not only saw it," she muttered, barely cutting herself off from calling him koishii, "I lived it." The western lord simply raised a brow as a question. Kagome swallowed the lump in her throat. "If you would like to sit down, I do not know how long this will take to explain."
The two moved into the room and he did as she bid, a part of him content that she trusted him enough to tell him whatever it was she was about to share. Something he was sure that most people (and possibly even himself) would find crazy or difficult to believe.
"Two nights before you brought me here, I… had a dream or vision I suppose. But it wasn't an ordinary vision with convoluted symbols or anything. I lived it. Some things have changed though I'll admit. For example last time you took me I had walked off, angry at Inuyasha earlier in the day. I ran into you, which had to mean you were following us." Though he made no outward reaction Sesshoumaru was surprised to hear this, so far the miko was right. "I was still… suicidal at that point and I practically dared you to kill me and tried to stare you down." She laughed a little at herself, "And instead of waking up dead, I woke up here. If you even noticed, I'm sure you found it odd that I knew my way around your entire compound without asking." Indeed he had noticed, "Except of course for the last door on the third floor of the east wing, which though rather close to the frequented library is forbidden," She looked over at his slightly widened eyes and smiled, "One thing you told me then, that you did not now. Of course last time… well I guess we'll refer to it as a vision for simplicity's sake. In the vision you had to tell me about that, I kept trying to escape. My attempts to do so led me all around this bloody castle looking for anything that could help me escape, any tool I could use, so you made sure I knew it was not permitted. I'm not sure if you were more amused or annoyed, but you didn't kill me…
"But there was one time I was almost positive you were going to. I don't remember what led me there, whether it was idle wanderings or plans to escape or just seeking a quiet place, I know I didn't mean to go in, it was just a door I happened to open and I walked in."
"The room…" Sesshoumaru offered.
The miko nodded, "The forbidden room. I had expected it to be a treasury, an armory, a memorial… but instead it seemed more like a museum. In fact it was so unlike what I had expected that I didn't even realize I was in that room. I'm sure if you went there now you would not smell a trace of me, I haven't been there the whole time I've been here. But I looked at everything then, swords, armor, a kimono, and tapestries. Then I saw it, a tall mirror, taller than you I remember thinking. I touched the frame, the gold inlaid tail of the phoenix, and my reflection started to change, to ripple. There were shapes, that were slowly becoming clear…" she turned her downcast eyes up at the youkai before her, "That was when I heard you growling." She shuddered slightly and moved her arms to hold herself. "I'll never forget the moment I saw you. Your eyes were red, I could see the youki violently swirling around you. I thought I was going to die, I thought you were going to kill me. And for some reason in that moment, dying started to scare me again. And everything went black, I would not have been surprised then had I never woke up again." She paused and bit her lip, but looked up at him again before continuing. "But I woke up two days later with a massive headache. I don't know what you did, I didn't even see you move. And to be honest at the time I was too surprised to be alive to even think about it.
"After that, things started to change, I don't know when or how but…" She laughed, "Next thing I knew we were… friends, and then." Shy eyes turned to the youkai lord, but quickly turned away, "And then we were more than that.."
She laughed at the expression Sesshoumaru gave her, obviously very surprised that in any world they would end up together. But then again was it so hard to believe? I mean he already like her, for a human of course, but still as a potential mate? Or… he glanced curiously at the miko. No he wouldn't even ponder whether or not they had mated in her vision.
"All in all I was here a month before Inuyasha and the others showed up." She continued, skipping the details, "However before anything could be cleared up, hell before things even got all that violent between you two… Naraku showed up. The fight… the fight was hard. And…we all," at this point the miko's voice kept getting caught in her throat and her eyes began to burn. "We all were hurt some. I… I had a cut on my leg… and I wasn't moving all that well. Naraku he lunged at me and… and Inuyasha was too far away and…" The first of her tears broke loose and traveled down her cheeks, "And you jumped in front of me. Naraku's claws cut into your chest… and you were slower now and… the next minute I saw the two of you with your hands in each other's chests.
"You killed him Sesshou, you won the battle for us but…the miasma, it was too much Sesshou... You died. You knew it. I held you, and you told me to be strong. You told me you loved me… and you died. Just like that you died." She looked up at him tears blurring her vision. "We buried you. Why did you die on me Sesshou?" The youkai was perhaps too surprised to move as the human girl flung herself at him, striking him in the chest once before pressing her face against him. "Why did you leave me Sesshou!? Why did you die!?" She choked on a sob, "Oh god, please tell me this is real. Please tell me I haven't gone insane. Sesshou?" The girl pulled back far enough to look at him, "Tell me the truth please, are you really here? Are you really alive?"
Sesshoumaru nodded, almost automatically, "I am living and here before you Kagome."
She smiled at him, though sadly, "Today would have been the day I looked in the mirror." The inu youkai simply nodded in response. The two sat there for neither knew how long, the miko half in his lap. Then one of her hands moved to balance herself on his thigh while the other went into his hair. Finally she leaned forward, taking his lips with her own. She poured everything into the kiss, every moment of pain and joy she could remember with him.
For a moment Sesshoumaru gave no reaction, in fact given what he experienced in their last kiss he reacted less then he would have thought. Maybe it was all the information she had told him. Maybe it was the idea that he would die, or the idea that he could love her. Or was it that when he opened his mouth he could taste tears on her lips? The youkai lord's eyes opened barely an instant after they had shut. Gently he pushed her back by her shoulder, expecting to see her close to tears for his rejection. However he was surprised to see a reminiscent smile upon her face. "You should rest," he said carefully, "It has been a very stressful day for you."
She nodded and backed away, "It's good to know you are real Sesshou. That means you're really alive."
And that seems to be all you really want? He wondered.
"As long as you're alive Sesshou…" she seemed to give up at that point, as though finishing it with anything would make her sound too pathetic. And some part of her knew there was no way to end that sentence that would be wholly true.
The first place Sesshoumaru went after leaving the miko was to the room where allegedly everything had changed. It was odd to think of, a place where everything changed, but it hadn't happened yet. In fact it seemed it would never happen now at all. But it seemed as though some things were still fated to occur, such as him bringing her to his home. When he opened the door he could tell that none had done so in months and her scent was, of course, absent. Hmmm… he thought for a moment About twenty days until Inuyasha comes to collect her. The youkai lord stopped in front of the mirror, the miko had been right it was taller than himself. Twenty days until an altercation with Naraku... The final confrontation? One top and side of the ivory frame was the design of the gold inlaid phoenix and the other half was a silver inlaid dragon, a few gems dotted the frame, on the eyes of the creatures and the tails of the phoenix. Ivory, he thought, reaching out to touch the solid white mass, mother's fangs.
Suddenly curious the youkai lord touched the phoenix tail where, given her height, he assumed Kagome had touched. He waited a moment…
As though to try and add some truth to her story Sesshoumaru ran his fingers along the frame, searching for some sign that the woman was not slowly going insane. He knew she had not been lying, she truly believed what she told him. Why make such things up? He thought, Why even fool oneself into believing them? As if to answer his question the mirror rippled as his fingers touched the claws of the dragon. Wide eyed the western lord watched and waited to see what would be shown to him. He saw what appeared to be the inside of a dilapidated building at night. Two men walked in wearing foreign clothes, as they spoke it seemed as if their voices were masked. "She should be in here," one voice said, the man who was not as far in, "the other side of this warehouse if I remember."
"This isn't the kind of thing you forget ," the man's name was horribly distorted and unidentifiable to his ear, and both spoke in hushed tones.
"You mean you can't sense her ? I thought you could at least do that."
The one in the lead stopped and turned, seeming to give the other a look of some kind. "How can you joke about that now? This is serious!"
"Lower your voice," the first one said, "You'll startle her."
"Keh," the point man said half under his breath. For a while there was silence as the two men went further into the building. Then they came upon a form curled up in the corner. Sesshoumaru received a surprise as he heard the first name spoken "Kagome… Miss?" The one knelt beside her, he reached out to her and she cringed back "Miss are you alright? I'm not going to hurt you. Please let me help you." After a moment Kagome was crying into the man's shirt, "Shh.. shh... don't worry you'll be ok." The one picked her up before the other spoke again.
"We're too late."
"Yes, but you knew we would be didn't you?"
"Take her to the hospital, I'll find the scum who did this."
"Better not do anything to him without me there," the point man reminded.
"I won't now hurry and get her help." The one holding her nodded again as the man with the deeper voice come closer. A hand placed itself tenderly on her forehead. "Sleep," he whispered.
Then the image rippled the two men were standing before a third, their eyes glowing dangerously. The third at this point had already been roughed up and the taller of the two reached over and picked the man up by his throat. Another fade, this time to his past when Sesshoumaru punished the rapist in the town, then quickly the image went to Kagome.
She was outside, the background was fuzzy, but there was lots of movement and she held her bow in her hands, he noticed blood on her right calf. Suddenly a mass of white rushed towards her, then it showed Naraku dissolving before his own bloodied frame in a mass of green and red smoke. Kagome ran to him as he fell, there was no sound as he watched her cry, watched himself reach out to her. That seemed to be all anyone was doing at that point. Watching. Even in the background he could see Inuyasha watching without a trace of satisfaction. My death…
Sesshoumaru blinked, closing his eyes for a fraction then he saw himself as he was in the mirror. Kagome was walking in behind him, looking aimlessly at the various items in the room. He turned to say something, somewhat annoyed, but was greeted with an empty room. The mirror-Kagome walked through his image and touched the glass, she seemed to look up at him and smile. Then she began to inspect the mirror. By her reaction it was easy for him to pinpoint the moment in which she had activated it. Why did it take this human girl to unlock both my parent's treasures? But... she hasn't yet. Then he noticed he had changed, no longer was it his true reflection but the fear inspiring image the young miko had explained to him earlier, she turned, frightened and suddenly the image went black.
Sesshoumaru was slightly annoyed that it had ended there as the mirror returned to normal. Something important happened after he had shown up, and somehow he did not think it had been anything he had done. Had he simply knocked the miko out she would not have slept for two days. So why did she have a headache when she awoke? Whatever happened directly affected her head, or perhaps her mind… He glanced at the phoenix tail where she had touched.
Or her soul perhaps?
He scowled as he turned away, There are too many unknown factors. Too little to go on than just mere speculation. He stopped at the door looking at the mirror, I expect you to be more cooperative when I return.
Hika-chan: What can I say? I was tired of Sesshoumaru being in the dark. I know I know this chappy's as short as all hell too. And to be honest most of this stuff I made up as I was writing it. I have no idea when the next chapter of this story will come out as most of my writing time (when I do anyway) is going to be focused on finishing Once In A Blue Moon (Chapter 16 is about half finished as I'm typing this and I know what almost the entire rest of the chapter is going to consist of). And I know I originally planned on having more stuff involved with the present (the Detective and maybe Mrs. Higurashi) but I forgot about that a couple chapters back and now I have no idea what I was gonna do with that. So might or might not pick that up again.Kagome: So you're saying the next chapter is completely blank right now.
Sesshoumaru: and you have no idea when you'll get to it.
Inuyasha: and you don't give a damn with what the rest of us are going through trying to find Kagome?
Hika-chan: Well… it's not that I don't care.. it's just not important to the story and I don't have the energy to-
Inuyasha: You're saying I'M not important!?
Sesshoumaru: Well I have to agree with her on that point
Inuyasha: Goddammit It's MY name on the damn show! And my name at the top of each chapter!
Inuyasha: See!? Look! "An INUYASHA Fanfic!" Where's my screen time goddammit!?
Hika-chan: Ok ok! I'll fix it next chapter I swear!
Inuyasha: You damn well better!