I asked Dean what Clara meant by Destiel being canon, because I didn't understand the meaning of those words. At first, he said he didn't know, but he then kissed me and said that it was what the girl meant. I really didn't expect that. I've always thought that Dean didn't love me in that way. I didn't think Dean loved men in that way. Even though I am an angel, thus making me genderless, my vessel was still a man, so I would assume that Dean wouldn't like me in that way. He seemed the majority of the time angry at me for any reason possible. But it might've been in the same way as I was angry at him when he made me leave the bunker. Human emotions are very strange. Even if I've experienced humanity, I was still unsure of all the feelings that passed through me during that time.
But I knew that Dean was very important to me since the Halloween of 2008. When Samhain's seal was broken. I wouldn't have talked about my doubts if I didn't trust him. And the angels brought me back to heaven as I was trusting Dean over my brothers and sisters. But in the end, I chose him over them. And I've never regret my choice. Except for that moment when I lost faith in him as I thought he might say yes to Michael, which meant that I would die because I betrayed the other angels. But he didn't say yes and we won in the end. I should've talk to Dean instead of Crowley, and shouldn't have tried to be God, because it made a rift between us that was never really repaired. I betrayed him, left him in purgatory and didn't trust him with the angel tablet. There was no way he could forgive me for all my mistakes. Maybe if I'd stayed in the bunker, we could've talked trough, but I had to leave. And everything else happened.
And now he kissed me. The feeling of his lips on mine. Very soft. I felt something through my body. Like when I kissed April, but much stronger. He then pulled away and said that it was what Clara meant. The sensation, I wanted it more. I felt empty without it. So I turned his head and kissed him. Slowly at first, but faster as we continued. I was eager for more of him. He accepted my tentative tongue in his mouth and they danced together like they always belonged together. The kiss was passionate and neither of us wanted to stop it. My hands under his t-shirt, I wanted to touch the body I once rebuilt. His hands in my hair were more and more pulling as mine ran through his abs and torso. I broke our kiss to remove Dean's shirt, but my hunter was so pleading. "Dean, your shirts." He then removed his plaid layer and I noticed something on his harm that wasn't there before. The Mark of Cain.
"Dammit Dean!" I said as I pulled myself away from him. He tried to bring me back close to him, but it was too late. I've seen the mark.
"Stop it Dean."
"I said stop it! Why do you have that atrocity on you?"
"To kill Abaddon."
"DEAN!" He understood the gravity of the situation and looked down.
"I'm sorry Cas. The only way to kill Abaddon is with the first blade and the only way to make it work is to have the Mark of Cain. I'm so sorry." He started crying and I hugged him. We spent what felt like an eternity like that, him in my arms, his hands on mine, his head on my shoulder. At some point, I realised that he fell asleep, and even tho Clara removed the cage a long time ago and was able to flee, I didn't want to go. Not ever.
NA : Like I said in chapter 10, i'm in exam, so i will post chapter 12 on tuesday the earliest. I hope you enjoyed. And yes, i think that Castiel has the superpower to make Cain!Dean cry. And sorry if you wanted that to be the lemon chapter for Destiel, i just thought that the discovery of the MoC would be a cockblock