Dawn's POV

Dear Diary,

Today will be two things for me, Christmas and the start of my journey to find Kenny. I decided to stay with Kenny's parents until after Christmas dinner to brighten things up for all of us. My mom called, but she didn't try to stop me or bring me back to Cerulean, which I'm grateful for. I miss her, though I'll probably never tell her that. I miss how we used to have Christmas, just the two of us. Well, that started after I was three, when my dad disappeared. My mom never talked about him, so he could be dead for all I know. I feel like it's my fault he's gone, I heard about him from the neighbors and said that after I was born he started acting strangely. I still have some trouble every now and then accepting that I couldn't have done anything even if I had wanted to.

But I'm determined to find Kenny, seeing what his absence has been like for his parents and based on my feelings alone, it's like I don't even have a choice. When I find him, I'm going to tell him, amnesia or not. I've practically memorized the poem he wrote, which only makes sense considering that I look at it at least five times a day. I haven't shown his parents yet, I don't think they should know about this in case . . . until I bring him back. I doubt his mom could handle it, I'm not sure about his dad though. All I know is that I'm having a hard enough time handling it on my own. I still blame myself for all of this, no matter how many times someone says it's not my fault. I blame myself for Rubia, Kenny, my dad, and all the terrible events inbetween

Not so merry Christmas,


I checked the clock on the stand in the guest room. Seven in the morning, time to go downstairs. I slipped on my buneary slippers and shuffled down to the living room, stretching and yawning. I looked and saw a hastily made stocking with my name on it in pink, glittery, puffy paint. I smiled and curled up on the blue suede like couch, letting my thoughts run around my head.

I felt a hand on my shoulder, "Dawn?"

I looked up, "Good morning, Mrs. Smith," I greeted Kenny's mom.

She smiled at me, a sad gleam in her eyes, "Merry Christmas, go ahead and check you stocking."

Mr. Smith was slumped back on a cushy chair, his glasses askew on his face. He had fallen back asleep as soon as he sat in it.

I grabbed my stocking and sat down, looking through the contents. There were around ten packs of bubble gum(something I was absolutely addicted to throughout elementary), a key chain with little pokemon figures on it, their house key attatched, a new pokegear cover(my old one was shredded), and a pair of pink daisy earrings.

I hugged Kenny's parents, "You guys didn't have to buy anything for me, really."

"We only bought some of it, your old friends in TwinLeaf got you the gum, a girl named Misty sent you the pokegear cover, and another girl named May sent you the earrings," she beamed, "And we have some other presents from your mother and a few other people here for you as well."

I grinned back, "Well, I got you guys a few things as well!"

"Really, Dawn, we've told you not to get us gifts," Mr. Smith reminded, waking up from his nap.

"You're pretty much family, so it only makes sense to get you something, no need to worry!" I bounced up, "Let me go get them!" I scuttled to my room, grabbed the two boxes, and ran back, placing one in each of their laps.

Mrs. Smith opened hers first, her hands flying up to her mouth, "A tea set? But this must have been expensive!"

I shrugged, "I felt really bad about breaking your old one in second grade, so when I saw this on sale, I had to get it."

Mr. Smith broke into a grin, "Good choice."

It was several boxes of chocolates, I remembered his outrageously ridiculous sweet tooth from last year when Kenny had tried to give me chocolates, but his dad ate every last one of them.

"Now, go grab your presents from under the tree," she encouraged.

I picked a green one and read the tag, 'From Leaf, Gary wants to take some credit because he was too cheap to get anyone presents, so I guess him too.' I opened it to find a cute pink dress with a white sash around the waist and white sleeves.

Since Mr. and Mrs. Smith were passing presents to each other, I went ahead and opened more of mine. A pair of shoes I had been wanting from my mom, and a happiny from Ash.

"Dawn? There's someone at the door for you," Mr. Smith called.

Wondering who it was, I walked to the front door.

It was a Serena and Calem.

"Oh, hi guys," I greeted, a little confused.

"You guys can come in and talk with her in her room, if you like," Mr. Smith offered.

"Thanks," they both stepped in, following me to my room.

I sat on my bed, and they closed the door behind them.

"So, what brings you here?" I asked.

"Have you heard that Rubia disappeared?" Calem started.

"Yeah," I nodded.

"Well, we know that you're the last person she talked to before she vanished," Serena confirmed, "So we were wondering if you knew anything."

I blinked, "But didn't you two have a fight or something on the last day?"

She looked stunned, and suddenly cautious, "What are you talking about?"

"Well, she was super touchy when I saw her and you weren't there. She said it was complicated," I recited.

"When did you see her?" she interrogated, now sitting next to me.

"I don't know, after lunch?" I shrugged.

She looked into my eyes for a moment, then sighed, "I don't get it."

"Huh?" I felt like an idiot.

"She. . . Well, she - I got a little out of hand, and she actually talked to you afterward. To be honest, we weren't expecting her to talk to anyone for a week or two," Serena admitted.

"Serena got mad and left school early for vacation because of it, but when I caught up with her, she was turning right back around," Calem smiled slightly.

"But when I got to our room, Rubia wasn't there," Serena groaned, "I asked everyone! Well, that I could find anyway."

"In short, we want to make sure she's okay," Calem ended.

"Wait, what was the fight about?" I paused.

"Um. . ." Serena's ears were pink, "You answer our question, then we'll answer yours!"

"She was abducted half dead from lying on the floor in an intensive care room by the police to who knows where, and her name couldn't be found by facial recognition scans or DNA sampling," I summarized, "Now, talk."

"She was spacing out again, and she started mumbling things, like, 'Why hasn't it happened yet?' and, 'I'm beginning to have regrets for once.' So, I asked her what the heck she was talking about. Then she mumbled, 'Why aren't you and Calem together yet? My calculations match up so that everything occurs in a precise order, and the battle is in around an hour and a half.' If you can imagine, I had a reaction," her ears were pretty red.

"Yeah, she almost flipped the lunch table, but instead she did a spit take all over Trevor and stood up yelling interesting comments at her. No one had a clue what was going on," Calem smirked.

"So, he tried to calm me down, but I ignored him completely," she continued.

"I don't think slapping counts as complete ignoring," he interrupted.

"Close enough, anyway, she just looked up at me and said, 'It already happened then, I was right,' and I exploded completely on her. I forget what I said-"

"I'm pretty sure it was when you yelled, 'You're either bribing or blackmailing the school to get information for your precious matchmaking! You know everyone's pressure points be evaluating them like we're some kind of experiment, it's sick, like we're beneath you!'" he shrugged.

"Oh, yeah," Serena looked guilty and mad at herself, "To that all she had to say was, 'Then why would I still be here? If I'm so above you, why am I still here, taking all the hits? Why haven't I just taken you down or cried for a teacher to save me from this? Why am I letting you continue? If you see me as I scientist, I am the kindest one you'll ever have, because I actually care. But you don't believe me, because of mistrust, hatred, you trusted Calem, and now you suspect he's betrayed you, so you're taking it out on me. I will gladly take the hits, because it's better than watching.'

"She said it so calmly, and I just couldn't handle that. So I told her, 'I know he wouldn't betray me, but I've never been sure about you! You've always been distant, full of secrets you guard so closely that not even the teachers know your middle name, family, hometown, or pokemon. You've done things that go directly against what we thought of you, like trying to run away and coming back dripping in blood, and I'm pretty sure not all of it was even yours, flipping a kid for flirting, and don't even get me started on him. Don't act like you don't know who I'm talking about, Rubia. You've done all sorts of things that involve that person that defies any explanation, even from him.' She got really harsh and cold after that."

"She practically brought down the temperature of the room below freezing with the look she gave her and how she held herself. She said, 'You do not want to say another word. I'm telling you this now, before I lose it, because I don't want to do it.' Serena didn't listen though, she replied in just about the worst possible way, 'Should I be scared? Are you going to attack me like Calem and Gary? Should I be scared of the monster that's finally coming out of her cave and into the light? Should I be scared because I know something she won't admit to herself?' Rubia just simply responded with, 'You should be scared, but not of me, of yourself. Which monster is really coming out into the light of day? I hate exposing you in front of your boyfriend, don't act so surprised, I know you've been secretly dating, but I don't want to do that,'" Calem narrated.

"Wait, you guys were secretly dating?" I paused.

"It's not a secret anymore, apparently. I pulled what I believe may have been the last straw, 'You know what, I think I've found out why you're so invested in everyone else's love lives, because you'll never have one of your own, you'll never even have a normal life. You'll never be brave or strong or caring enough to step out of hiding and face the music. You'll never admit one thing to yourself, that you've been in love with N this entire time, and that all the crap that's been going on in this school is caused by you. You ruin everything as soon as you look at it, you can't even have friends you actually care about. You don't trust us, you lie, you manipulate everyone to go along with your sick soap opera, and you act all sweet and innocent. You're always the victim, even when you're the one who hurts them in the end,'" Serena repeated, "'I hate you, I wish you didn't exist, go run to our room and wither for all I care.'"

"What she ended with worried me, 'You aren't the first to want me to die, and you won't be the last. But look at me, I'm still here. I don't want a love life, and a normal life ended for me eight years ago. But since I am clearly unwanted here, I'll leave, I don't want to cause any more pain than I already have,' then she stood up, and walked away. Trevor and Tireno tried to talk to her, and Shauna wasn't there, but it didn't work. She didn't talk to anyone. We literally tried everything, but she wasn't anywhere. Then, the other day, we were going to check up on her at work, but she was gone. Everyone said that she just left after talking to a girl with dark blue hair, and disappeared," Calem sighed.

"Since she was pretty good friends with N, why didn't you just ask him?" I asked.

"He disappeared too," Serena admitted, "We're clueless. We don't know anything about her past besides that for some reason she hates fire, scared of water, knows a variety of martial arts, and has a really bad history with formal dancing with a partner. Also, she never takes her gloves off. Even for swimming, she has special gloves."

"You guys are her best friends, don't you even know her hobbies or anything? Like where she lives?" I went further.

"No, we barely know anything about her. Heck, we don't know her favorite color," Calem groaned, "We really sucked as friends, didn't we?"

"Well, sorry. I don't know anything more than you do," I apologized.

"Actually, you helped. If she disappeared with the police, and as far as we know has done nothing wrong, they probably put her in a witness protection program. After all, she got attacked a lot at school by people that no one knew," Calem thought.

"Attacked?" I blinked, "Why did anyone attack her?"

"We have no idea, just sometimes she would come into our room with bruises and cuts. She hid them pretty well though, but one time she walked into lunch with a split lip," Serena shrugged.

"Well, thanks, Dawn. Merry Christmas," they both stood up and left.

I walked back to the living room, "Sorry about that," I apologized.

"It's fine, something came for you. A redhead who said her name was Aurora said another girl named Rubia wanted you to have it," Mr. Smith tossed me a box.

Shocked, I struggled to catch it, then read the card, 'Sorry, I really suck at making judgments. If you want to know what happened to Kenny, he was possessed by Mewtwo, who knocked me out before he ran off. I'm really sorry, it's all my fault. I don't know where he is, but I'm sure you could research it and find a place. My fault, Rubia.'

I unwrapped the paper nervously, not sure what to expect.

No one seems to have read last chapter, from what I can see from reviews. Seriously, I think I threw you guys off when I combined a bunch of chapters. When I post chapter thirty two, I'm going to have to tell everyone to go back so they won't be majorly confused.

Thanks to you, my wonderful readers!