A/N: While writing my drabble for this week from Sam's POV (which will be posted tomorrow), I really wanted to get into Dean's head a bit. The fic is very short and all the italicized sentences are actual quotes from the show so I really didn't write a whole lot. LOL

The mark can be transferred to someone who's worthy.

You mean a killer, like you?


I know Sam is watching me. Neither of us has spoken since Crowley left us high and dry but I can feel my brother's eyes on me. Not that Sam is being obvious about it. I just know my brother….or my working partner, as he prefers to be thought of these days.

You're my big brother. There's nothing I wouldn't do for you.

Apparently that didn't include forgiveness.


I knew he couldn't be silent the whole trip.

"Dude, I'm fine. Quit staring at me."

"I'm not staring." He purposely looks out the passenger window.

"Well, sideways glancing or whatever the hell you want to call it."

I reach for the radio hoping he'll take the hint and I see my hand trembling. It's been doing that ever since I dropped the First Blade. I hope Sam doesn't notice but I can tell by his sharp intake of breath that he does. He decides not to confront me, knowing I'll just blow him off anyway.

Dean, you are quite the killing machine.

Well, thanks for noticing, Crowley, you son of a bitch. Like I didn't already have those thoughts floating around in my head, you have to go and confirm what I've been thinking for years.

Daddy's blunt little instrument.

I tortured souls and I liked it.

What I'm good at is slicing throats.

I'm a killer and there's no changing that.

I'm going to die with a gun in my hand, because that's what I have waiting for me, that's all I have waiting for me.

Okay, so maybe not a gun but a blade. Same difference.

I've always heard what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. If that blade doesn't kill me, it will make me stronger. I could feel it the first time Magnus forced it into my hand. The power surging through me was unlike anything I'd ever known. I can't help but wonder if that's how Sammy felt when he was all hopped up on demon blood. I can understand why he was hooked.

I can't admit…..no…..I won't admit to Sam how the blade made me feel. Maybe if he still considered himself my brother…...

I believe in you, Dean.

Yeah, well, I managed to screw that up royally, didn't I? Did I really think trusting an angel was going to end well?

Can't you see, I'm poison.

Which is the real reason for everything, isn't it? I have tried so hard to take care of him and I have always failed. Same as I've failed every other godforsaken person who's had the misfortune of knowing me….Dad, Bobby, Kevin…..god, Kevin…..he trusted me to keep him safe but instead, I'm the one who let the killer in...while trying to protect my brother.

Everything that has ever gone wrong between us has been because we're family.

I was only trying to look out for you, Sammy.

I had to look out for you. That's my job.

I had one job and I screwed it up.

What am I supposed to do?

I know what I'm supposed to do. The only thing I can. The one thing I'm actually good at.

With the mark comes a great burden. Some would call it a great cost.

I glance over at Sam. Our eyes meet for a second and I think I see concern there but I know I'm only kidding myself. I've lost my brother, there's nothing left for me to lose, no greater cost.

The mark can be transferred to someone who's worthy.

You mean a killer, like you?


Thanks for reading! Comments are always welcome!