THE FANFICTION TIMES
April 6, 2014
NEW SERIES OF FUN?
"A new series is on the go,"
says private investigator
Cyrus Leal. "In fact, it's
another parody series,"
states his partner, Ray
Mora. We can only
hope this series will
stay for a long time.
Two private investigators sat in a sepia-themed parody of a 1950's PI office. Their two names were Cyrus Leal and Ray Mora, (totally not Cereal and Roy in disguise), sipped their drinks, waiting for a case. Cyrus was dressed in a red Hawaiian shirt with beige trousers and black shoes. He also donned some really cool Matrix-like black shades. Ray wore a tan fedora and tan trenchcoat, and tan trousers and tan, tan, tan, tan... Oh, his shoes were also tan. Cyrus was in the middle of sipping his coffee when Felina Feral, daughter of Commander Feral, burst in through the door. Cyrus spit out some coffee and choked on the rest, leading Ray to punch Cyrus in the back. Cyrus slapped Ray in response, leading them to get into a serious slap-fight until Felina screamed "Stop it" at the two. They froze in place and turned their heads to Felina. "Guys, I have a case for you two," she said, handing them a small-sized stack of papers. "Oh. Paperwork. GREAT." Cyrus whined. Felina gave him a death stare. He put on a smile. "Oh, paperwork! Yay!" Felina didn't stop staring. "I'm dead." He said quietly. "So, it's a murder case." Felina stated.
"Really? A murder case in Megakat? Honestly, even though the city is in constant danger, there was basically never a murder." Ray stated.
"That's why it's odd." Felina said.
"Hm... If we take this case, is there a chance we'll die like said victim?" Cyrus asked.
"Yeah." Felina replied bluntly.
"Eh, nothing to lose. I mean, we are the Private Investigators of the Fourth Wall." Cyrus said, taking the papers and putting his signature in the required spaces. They got in Felina's car and drove to the scene of the crime, in front of the Megakat Bank. They stepped out, well, Cyrus literally flung himself out of the car, but that's not the point. They crossed the police tape into the scene with all the cops taking pictures and things. The victim was covered in what they determined gunshot wounds with blood pooled around him. When all the hubub had passed, Cyrus turned the body over to where his back was on the ground.
"Gonna check his ID and things, Cyrus?" Ray asked.
"No, I'm seeing if this guy has a twenty." Cyrus responded.
"Oh. See if he has a five, too. I need a snack."
After searching the wallet, they in fact did find the twenty and five, and discovered his ID. The victim was Michael Blake Cinnamon, an author.
"Dammit! I loved this guy's works!" Cyrus and Ray exclaimed angrily.
"Welp, nothing we can do now." Cyrus stated, scribbling in his notebook.
"What are you writing down?" Ray asked.
"Hm? Oh, I'm training to draw highly detailed pictures of things in under 5 seconds upon meeting/finding them." Cyrus said, working intently.
"Well stop it, the chapter's over."