A/N:Wow! I actually did a short story! O.o;; This is my first Cowboy Bebop fic, so er…be gentle! Just know that I adore the "Oh my God I love you oh so much!!" reviews JUST as much as the, "This is good, but you should work on blah, blah, blah" ones. I'm versatile.
Disclaimer:CB belongs to that EVIL person who decided killing Spike would be fun. Bittersweet my ass. I'm rebelling!
Dedication:To the one or two people who decide to review this. I love you! ;.;
"…I remember how I used to pretend that you were going to fall in love with me. You'd look at me one night, while I was sleeping on the couch, and think to yourself, "God she's beautiful!" and you'd realize how much you wanted me.
That never happened. You never got over her. You never quit loving her. You died to avenge her. I remember getting the news that you had died after a heated battle with Vicious. I remember the silence as the tears came out of my eyes, ruining my eye liner. I can recall exactly the way Jet's mouth dropped in horror, and every emotion I saw cross his eyes.
I remember wondering why I wasn't good enough for you. That night, I'd taken a good long look at myself and I changed. I changed everything about me. I became what you thought was the perfect woman. I don't know what I was thinking. I may have hoped it'd bring you back, if you knew that I was just as good…but I wasn't. It wasn't me. I couldn't keep it up for much longer before I went out and gambled all my money away again. That's just me thought Spike. The me you don't love. The me that wasn't enough to keep you here. You were the only thing that I really had and you're gone. You're gone.
I don't even know why I'm sitting here, talking to your grave like you can hear me. Maybe you can? I just…needed to tell you these things. These feelings I feel. I had to tell you. Even if I can't tell you where you can actually hear me. I needed to get this off of my chest. I just can't go much longer without you Spike. I can feel it. I'm strong. I know it. But what does one have to live for if they don't have love? That's why you left isn't it? So I'm leaving too. I don't know where I'm going to end up…maybe we'll meet each other? That'd be nice…"
She trailed off. She stroked the letters on the stone, and I could tell she was crying.
"Or maybe I'm standing right behind you, waiting for you to turn around and notice I'm here."
Her head swung, and she looked like she'd seen a ghost. Which, I guess she figured she had.
"SPIKE?!" she screamed out, before tackling me to the ground in her arms.
"Yeah," my voice came out muffled into her shoulder, "It's me."
"I thought…I thought…you were dead!"
"It's not the first time I've faked it you know. I had to stay away from things awhile."
"Then…who's body is in there? Why didn't you contact us? Wha…" she could barely finish her sentences.
"Well, I'm not exactly sure. Who's ever I put into the room where they do those things…to see if you're alive and junk…and I didn't contact you because I was…" I coughed out something that remotely sounded like afraid, and grinned, "As for your last question, the last letter you're looking for there is a t."
She looked at me, and it almost hurt. She seemed to want to kill me and kiss me, at the same time.
Luckily, she went with the latter, which left me wondering if she'd saved the killing for later. To prolong my time alive, and, of course, for other less crucial meanings, I kissed her back. I don't really know how long we laid there on the ground, making out in front of the tombstones. I only knew that this was happiness. I'd know a true sorrow, and now I'd know a true love. I could live now.