Oh, what did they do to Pandaroo?
Kim comes home to find the unthinkable has happened to Pandaroo. Can she get to the bottom of it before someone gets hurt? KIGO
This story is not for profit. I was really bored one night and had a camera. This is the result. I'm just having a bit fun and bringing Disney along for the ride.
Chapter 1 – Soft Plush
The young hero came home exhausted after a long mission, an extra long mission thanks to her best friend and sometimes somewhat competent sidekick, Ron Stoppable. This was not one of his better days. Not only did Ron talk incessantly to and from the mission about a possible Snowman Hank reunion, he somehow lost his pants as he knocked over a vat of jelly like substance inside an insecticide factory, tipping the contents over the pair of them. The result was an uncomfortable two-hour ride home in an unventilated cargo plane, which made Kim feel like she was a walking, talking, giant mothball.
At the earliest opportunity Kim planned on jumping into a shower to rid herself of the unbelievable stench, and the sticky and uncomfortable film that coated her skin and infused her hair. She did not care if she bathed fully clothed. She had thought about burning her clothes in the backyard afterwards but they were probably still far too flammable and probably still would be after many rinse cycles.
She wearily climbed the stairs to her room and turned on the light. Her tired eyes did not take in the state of her room. Even being considered an adult by the state, with full voting rights, it did not stop her parents from haranguing her about her recent lapses in tidiness. She couldn't help it. She had other things occupying her mind. College was simply keeping her far too busy to worry about little things like tidying. The redhead prepared herself for her shower and started to undress. She reached down to her pillow to retrieve her pyjamas. And that's when she saw it.
Kim Possible's childhood and now adult toy, one definitely not found in a paper bag or to be blown up, was lying on her pink comforter definitely not as she had left him. The black-bodied plush toy, Pandaroo, was slightly turned to the side. His massive tan tail making it impossible for the toy to lie flat on his back. The shocking part was that he was not alone on the bed. Intertwined with Pandaroo was his fellow Cuddle Buddy, Otterfly. If it wasn't for the large hind roo legs hooking it in place, the very blue plush toy looked like it was hovering over Pandaroo. They looked very well acquainted.
"Oh, my goodness! Otterfly, where did you come from?" gushed Kim.
She was so excited to see the toy that she totally forgot about her smelly mission and her weariness. She had secretly wanted Otterfly for so long now and didn't mind that the plush before her wasn't the special edition version she had seen in Go City a few months back. The redhead rushed towards the bed and grabbed both toys. She wanted to hug them closely to her body, but she did not want them to make contact with her soiled clothing. Kim then raced down to where she had only greeted her mother moments earlier.
The Possible matriarch was seated in the living area quietly reading a brain journal with a large cup of tea in hand. Soft classical music was playing through the surround system. It was one of the rare moments of late that the gifted medical specialist and academic was at home, let alone had time for herself.
As Kim raced through the door, she called out, "Oh mom, thank you so much for Otterfly! I have wanted one for so long now. How did you know?" asked the redhead excitedly.
"What are you talking about, Kimmie?" asked Anne Possible glancing over the top of her journal in the direction of her daughter. She placed her cup on the side table and gave her daughter her full attention.
"You know, the Otterfly you left on my bed. It was the best surprise ever. And its not even my birthday," gushed Kim in a single breath.
"I'm sorry, Kimmie, but I still don't know what you're talking about. What is an Otterfly?" Anne's face furrowed in confusion, her blue eyes were questioning.
Kim plucked the blue winged toy from in front of her chest and presented it to her mother. "This is Otterfly. He is a Cuddle Buddy and I've wanted one for the longest time now. You know, to keep Pandaroo company."
Anne Possible raised a perfectly arched eyebrow. Her daughter reddened when she realised how childish she sounded. She suddenly became uncomfortable with revealing so much of herself, even to her own mother. She was a sophomore in college and was supposed to be all grown up and mature. College students were supposed to be concerned with boys, parties, and getting ready for the future, not gushing over plush toys that she should have outgrown by the time she was a preteen.
Before Kim could really start to squirm, her mother came to her rescue. "Honey, I know you have been swamped with school and missions of late, and I would like to say it was me that brought that beautiful smile to your face, but it wasn't," admitted Anne.
"Oh. What about dad? Do you think it was his doing?" asked Kim hopefully. As far as James Possible was concerned Kim was his little girl and nothing would change that.
"No. You know that he's been busy at the Space Centre trying to get his latest project to come online. It's been a massive undertaking. Lately, he barely remembers to eat or come home, so I doubt that he'll think to buy his favourite daughter an ... Otterfly is it?"
Kim nodded. Her mom was correct. Of late the Possible family patriarch was missing in action. Instead of dinners in the dining room, the Possible children, more often than not ate their meals in front of the TV whilst arguing over the remote. It miffed Kim no end that without the parents adjudicating, the twins outnumbered her each and every time. Instead of fashion and music channels it was all about science, documentaries and Beauty and the Geek. Go figure.
Who else could it be? The young hero thought about who could have left her such a thoughtful gift. Not her darling brothers that's for sure. They would never be so nice to their sister. They would also be loath to spend any money on her. This frugalness also seemed to extend to birthdays and Christmas. All of their available funds went to their mad scientist projects.
"Honey, what about Ron? Do you think he came over and put it on your bed when no one was home? Sometimes I think that boy lives here and considers this house like his second home," suggested Anne trying to be helpful.
The young hero instantly went bright red, the flush extending down to neck and arms. With the way her mother's eyebrow cocked instantly, Kim knew her reaction had been noticed.
"Am I missing something, Kimmie?" asked Anne.
Kim could not tell her mother the real reason why Ron would never come into her room in secret ever again, the time she caught him wearing her clothes, where she had threatened him within an inch of his life. It wasn't her proudest moment menacing her best friend like that but Ron had seriously violated her privacy. Goodness knows what the little pervert got up to when left unsupervised in a room filled with ladies intimate apparel. Kim was a lady at heart and liked silky things like all girls her age. Also, Kim was not sure whether Ron had accessed her real secrets including those located in a box hidden under her bed, wrapped in that green bow.
If the truth came out now, it would forever change how the Doctors Possible thought of her best friend and trusty sidekick. He would never be welcomed the same way into the Possible house again. So Kim did the only thing she could, she lied to her mom.
"Mom, you know how busy Ron is at the moment? He's behind in his assignments and trying to catch up before the end of the semester. Besides he has his hands full with Yori. He's trying to convince her to come here to live permanently, maybe even marry her one-day. She's worried she won't fit in with his 'American ways'."
Anne gave her daughter a look of disbelief but didn't question her explanation. "That's silly."
"I know, right?" said Kim with a nervous giggle.
Anne went back to reading her journal. When Kim did not move, the older redhead once again addressed her daughter. "Was there something else, Kimmie?"
"Ah, no, I'm just still stumped to how Otterfly got into my room."
"Kimmie, I wouldn't worry about it. I'm sure there will be an explanation soon enough and you can thank the giver then."
"I guess you're right. Thanks, mom. I need to go and have that shower now. I'm beat and I still smell and feel like a mothball," said Kim with disgust.
Anne laughed at her daughter. "I wasn't going to say anything, but yeah you do. At least we won't have to call the pest control man this year." Anne swiped her hand across her nose to indicate that Kim reeked.
"That's not funny, mom," said Kim rushing out of the room and in the direction of the nearest bathroom.
Days later, Kim came home after another trying mission. This one was without Ron. He was still trying to catch up with his assignments and was very apologetic to her beforehand. Accompanying her in Ron's place was the very uptight, very superior, 'I'm never wrong' and aggravating, Will Du.
The Global Justice agent was the most infuriating individual the young hero had ever come across. His condescending manner and penchant for following rules to the letter left Kim with a murderous feeling. She desperately wanted to have a swipe at that uptight git, Du, but he was Betty Director's pet project and it wouldn't have been proper for a hero to be acting in such a manner especially if said hero was hoping to work for the organisation full time post college.
Kim desperately needed an outlet. It was a pity that Drakken and Shego had decided to go straight after receiving their pardons. She had always found missions involving the pair to be fun and rather satisfying but after the Lowardian Invasion, the pair had simply vanished. Whenever Kim had broached the subject with the Global Justice head, she received the non-answer of 'it's classified'. The redhead often wondered if Shego had married Drakken and whether in married life she mocked and bossed the blue scientist around just as much as she did working for him. Probably. She also wondered if the green woman was happy.
The young hero threw her mission gear on the bed. Something was wrong. Where were Pandaroo and his new friend Otterfly? She had left them together in the centre of the bed after making it first thing in the morning. She got down on her knees and searched under the bed. Nothing. She threw open her laundry hamper. Empty. They were not in there. Clothes and other items long piling up had also been removed from the floor. The room was clear, literally.
Kim's eyes went to the armchair near the window. She spotted the tan tail of Pandaroo. She made her way across to the chair. The plush toys had been arranged on the chair. Otterfly was sitting up, his blue wings flush with the upholstery and Pandaroo had his face in the Otterfly's nether regions, well he would have if plush toys had genitals. The kangaroo tail was positioned high in the air. Kim's initial thought was that it looked like an erect tan penis. Otterfly suddenly didn't look so innocent either.
"Oh, bad, bad, Kim!" said the redhead chastising herself. "Maybe mom moved them while she was cleaning up. She does something nice and your first thought was in the gutter. I'm such a bad daughter."
The college student sat on her bed resting her head on her palms. Maybe she needed to get out more and meet more... people. She needed to do what normal students did to unwind, parties, dating, making out, and relationships. Kim couldn't remember the last time she went on a date. It might have been with Ron. Might have been? Now she was lying to herself? Its not like she accepted any dates recently. Of course it was with Ron and they hadn't dated in a long while. He moved on quickly and was talking marriage while Kim had remained stagnant in the love department.
Kim started rubbing her temples. She was obviously more tired than she realised. But then spending any time with Will Du could make anyone start hallucinating and having unproductive conversations with themselves about the sex lives of plush toys.
It was family night. The game of Scrabble the Possible family was playing was getting on Kim's nerves and not because it was dragging on. They were cheating. Kim was convinced of it. Was it her fault she wasn't a scientist or scientifically minded? Then why was she being punished for it? There had to be a rule that prevented science and technical jargon being used in the word game.
The redhead was bored and could not wait until it ended. She looked down at her own tiles. She felt she had nothing to contribute. Kim started to rearrange her tiles, T.E.D.I.P.O.R. Tedi por? Teddy porn? What the heck was teddy porn? Where did that come from? Pandaroo was too young to know what that was. Heck, she was too young.
Kim looked up at her family. She noticed that Tim, who was sitting next to her, was looking at her and smirking. She had been busted and her face started to flush.
"What?" Kim demanded defensively. "Stop cheating, Tweeb."
Tim's smirk got bigger as he replied, "As if you have anything useful. You're coming last."
When Anne Possible leaned forward and placed her tiles down on the board, spelling the word Q.U.A.R.K, Kim knew it was all over and that she had indeed come last.
"Triple word score, fifty-four points. I do believe I win," said Anne triumphantly. The three Possible males all groaned in response. Anne Possible ruled in Scrabble.
Kim silently fist pumped. She stood up and declared she was meeting Monique at the mall and needed to get ready. She ran up to her room to make a quick outfit change. She screamed as she spied the bed. She had jinxed Pandaroo. There he was, positioned with Otterfly in a sixty-nine position. Her precious toys had been violated before her eyes.
Kim's scream had alerted her mother and brothers to her room. "Kimmie, what's the matter?" Anne asked with concern. Kim pointed to the plush toys on her bed. Her brothers just sniggered but Anne's face showed pure confusion. She could not see what the issue was.
"Kimmie, what's wrong? What are you pointing at?"
"Mom, look! That's not how I left Pandaroo and Otterfly. I would never do that to them. I did not leave them having sexy time together like, like... They deserve more respect than that. This is not the first time I have come home to have them violated. At first I thought it was my imagination but this is proof the Tweebs are messing around with my Cuddle Buddies and I want them to stop!"
Anne did not look convinced. "Kim, I think you're blowing everything out of proportion. They're just toys sitting on top of one another."
The hero winced a little. She couldn't believe how silly her accusations had sounded out loud but now that she had started, pride kept her going. "They're not just toys. That's my Pandaroo and you know I can't sleep without him. Otterfly has become just as important to me. Make them stop, mom."
Anne turned to her sniggering sons. "Have you boys been touching Kim's toys?"
"We haven't ...," began Jim.
"TOUCHED Kim's toys," finished Tim.
Kim had always hated how they finished each other's sentences. This time was no different. She didn't trust those Tweebs. She didn't like how the word 'touched' was emphasised. That meant they were up to no good. How could she convince her mother?
"I don't believe them," said Kim, crossing her arms in defiance. "I know they've been up to something."
Anne wasn't buying it. "Honey, your brothers may be many things but they're not liars. Until you have anything concrete we have to take their word on this."
Kim was not happy but her mom was right. She could not accuse the twins on a hunch even if they did look guilty as hell in her opinion. "I guess."
"Now honey, aren't you meeting Monique at the mall?"
"So girlfriend, it's been too long. How have you been?" The fashion diva said leaning back on the upholstered backrest.
"I guess I'm okay, Mon," said Kim stirring her health shake.
"Ah-oh. I sense a sitch. What's up GF? School okay? Ron? Your missions?"
"Yeah, they're all okay. Except when I'm teamed up with Will Du. That man is an uptight prig."
Monique giggled. She knew exactly how Kim felt about the Global Justice agent. Their interactions always ended with Kim criticising everything about the man, even the way he glanced at his watch or even breathed. "So, why are you so flat?"
"Promise you won't laugh or think I'm crazy?" pleaded the redhead.
The dark skinned woman before her nodded. Kim decided she needed to get it off her chest so she began to tell her friend everything. To her credit Monique did not interrupt. She let Kim vent.
"Mon, am I going crazy?" Kim asked pleadingly, " I feel as if I am."
"Kim, I don't think you're crazy but I think maybe you aren't happy with your life and you're focusing your unhappiness on the Cuddle Buddies. Admit it GF, it's the most exciting thing happening in your life at the moment."
The hero directed her olive eyes to her friend, her face crumpled as she thought about what had been said. She knew that Mon was right. She was in a rut and the Cuddle Buddy sitch was the most excitement she had in a very long time. And even then was she making a mountain out of a molehill?
The fashion diva continued, "When was the last time you went on a date?"
"Not since breaking up with Ron," replied Kim unhappily.
"Girl, that was eighteen months ago. Have you been interested in anyone?" Kim shook her head to indicate that she had no contenders.
"At all? There has be someone cute that you could crush on?"
"No? Why not? My campus is full of hotties."
"I don't know!" Kim was beginning to feel like she was being interrogated. "I just haven't met anyone interesting, alright. I have been sooo busy, you know with my missions and school work."
"Really? That's different from high school, how? Have you even tried meeting new people? Guys?"
Kim reddened from her friend's scrutiny. She knew Mon was right. She hadn't made an effort at all. Sure, there were a lot of pretty faces at her college but the desire wasn't there and she was tired with the whole process. If she was really honest, she was just bored generally and was going through the motions, with everything.
''Aside from Will Du, how are the missions going?"
"They're okay but the villains aren't the same anymore. You know, since Drakken and Shego left and got married. This is going to sound awkweird but I kind of miss them."
"Mm ... And what do you miss about them, Kim?" probed Monique.
"They were fun. I never knew what to expect with Drakken's schemes. And Shego gave me a good workout."
"That's it? That's all that you miss?"
"Wasn't green and bad fun to hang out with?"
"Yeah, she was especially when she was Ms Go." Kim thought about what she liked about the green woman. "She could read me really well and would tease me to throw me off my game."
The fashion diva remained quiet as Kim spoke, playing with her straw. "She was a hero you know? I could never work out why she left her brothers and started working for Drakken let alone marrying him. I can't believe she actually married him. He was sooo whiney. She wouldn't even listen to his schemes and she was his sidekick. She didn't look like she loved him, kill maybe, but not love. Imagine their bedroom banter. Why would she do that, Mon?"
"I don't know, its something you need to ask Shego. Kim, answer me something honestly." Kim nodded in agreement.
"Is that what's really bothering you? The fact Shego gave it all up to be Drakken's wife and probably partakes in 'bedroom banter' as you put it and just vanished without saying goodbye?"
"Yeah. I've tried to find her to ask her about it but Wade and Dr Director are stonewalling me. She's too beautiful to end up with Mullet Man. Their children will end up being ugly!"
Monique started laughing at Kim's honest comments.
"Kim, I know you don't want to hear this but I think you are crushing on green girl. Maybe the Cuddle Buddies sitch is your mind projecting the real issue."
"Mon! How you can say that?"
"I'm just going on what you've told me. And girl, you didn't deny the crushing part."
Kim felt her whole body flush with embarrassment. "What do I do?"
"The first thing is to contact Wade to find out where that girl is at. You need to talk to her find out what exactly happened, whether she is married and if she is staying out of trouble. My guess is with a wicked woman like that, the answer is no. Maybe you could help arrest her if it makes you feel better." Kim giggled at Monique's suggestion.
"Second, stop reading into the 'teddy porn'. Unless you have something concrete to go on, don't waste your time. It could be all a coincidence. We humans have this unfortunate habit of looking for patterns into random events where there are none. And if it's really bothering you, maybe get Wade to help you with security."
The hero realised that her friend was right. She had a lot to think about. She got up and went over to her dear friend and hugged her close. "Thanks, Mon. I'm glad I didn't weird you out with this sitch."
Monique laughed and hugged her friend in return. "Kim, you know I have never judged you and I'm not going to start now. You're my best friend and I love you dearly just the way you are. Besides can't a girl live precariously through her friends especially when her life isn't the satin and sequins she imagined it to be?"
The fashion student released the hero and looked her friend in the eye. "You better keep me posted GF, otherwise there will be hell to pay."
The redhead laughed. "I promise and I love you too, Mo."
Monique smiled at her friend, "Now, when was the last time you saw Bonnie ..."
A/N:I'd like to thank the Campsie Chook Lady for her help with Scrabble. I've only played it a couple of times and she whipped my behind. I truly suck at it.